I am 77 years old from China. I have never heard
Teacher lectured in person. I am a
practitioner who has obtained the Fa twice. The first time when I obtained the
Fa was at the end of 1998. I began to practice cultivation with the
encouragement of my overseas relatives.
At that time, many factors greatly affected my
cultivation; such as my old age, limited ability of understanding, various
notions that had formed throughout my life in ordinary society, and various
attachments such as playing mahjong, drinking liquor and watching television. My
understanding of Falun Dafa was at a very low level that of limited to healing
and fitness. Shortly after ten thousand practitioner's appealed on April 25th,
1999, I gave up cultivation because of my fears in the belief about the negative
reports from the official media.
On the second day when I arrived in Singapore in
November 2000, I was fortunate enough to attend the 2000 Singapore Falun Dafa
Cultivation Experience Sharing Conference. After listening to the practitioners'
excellent speeches and their dramatic physical and mental changes, my heart was
shaken. I also learned that Falun Dafa had spread in more than 50 countries all
over the world including Singapore. Falun Dafa is not only legal but also gained
recognition and respect in all these countries. People are free
to practice in the open environment. The practitioners with different
nationalities and races study the Fa and practice the exercises together. The
harmonious and peaceful environment forms a striking contrast to the controlled
environment in China that is filled with
false propaganda. I once again felt the solemnity and magnificence of Falun Dafa
from the bottom of my heart. So, I finally returned to the road of cultivation
practice in Falun Dafa.
Over the past one year, because all my family
members are practitioners, I gradually understood many principles through
constant study of the Fa and taking part in experience sharing activities. My
understanding of Falun Dafa has been upgraded from the perception to
rationality. I have truly experienced Dafa's profundity and immensity.
Shortly after I began to practice cultivation, I
experienced the rigorous test of life and death. On one evening at the beginning
of this year, when I was taking a shower, I suddenly felt my chest suffocating,
and lots of blood gushed out of my mouth. I vomited and had diarrhea. I
immediately fainted and tumbled on the floor. After a long time, I came to my
senses. My head had minor wounds, I felt dizzy. My limbs had no strength, and I
could not stand firmly. From then on, it was very difficult for me to take food.
If the food was slightly hard, my stomach would suffer severe pain. Sometimes, I
felt my whole chest was very painful; I could only have one meal per day. I
could not relieve my bowels easily, and only moved my bowels once a week or once
every 10 days, which made my lower abdomen protrude prominently. Because I ate
little and often spat blood, I was very weak and lost more than 10 kilograms. My
relatives in China were all worried about me and persuaded me many times to see
a doctor or to go to back to China for treatment.
During this period, when I suffered from severe physical pains everyday, my
mind wavered. Sometimes, I wondered
if Teacher still took me as his disciple who once departed from Dafa, and I also
thought that I was so old and the time for me to cultivate would not be enough.
It would be better for me to go back to China to have a treatment. However, my
relatives around me are all practitioners, they repeatedly explained to me from
the perspective of the Fa. Finally, I realized the reason why I suffered a lot
was to eliminate the karma that has been accumulated during my previous lives.
My relatives also encouraged me to practice and study the Fa with them everyday,
and read other practitioners' experience sharing articles to strengthen my
righteous thoughts.
Teacher said in his article,
"Sickness Karma," "Why does a new student who has just
begun studying the practice, or a veteran student whose body has been adjusted,
experience physical discomfort in his cultivation, as though he were seriously ill? And why does this happen once in a while?
I told you in my Fa lectures that this is to eliminate your karma and to improve
your enlightenment quality while eliminating the karma from your different
previous lives. Besides, this is also to test whether you are determined in
following Dafa; this will continue until your cultivation reaches
Beyond-Triple-World-Law. This is putting it in general terms.[Essentials for
Further Advancement]
This tribulation lasted for half a year. It is
hard for me to describe how much I have physically and mentally suffered. After
that, my health began to recover little by little. Then another test set in. I
slipped on the floor and fell. The cut from the concussion on my head was 2-
centimeters long. But I recovered soon. If this had happened to an elderly
person who did not practice cultivation, one would suffered from the side
effects of cerebral concussion. Ten years ago, my stomach had a massive
hemorrhage, I was sent to the emergency center in the middle of the night. At
that time, I had to stay in the hospital for one month. I had suffered everyday.
I was on medication, and required daily transfusion and gastroscopic
examinations. These made me feel very painful. After I left the hospital, I
continue with the medicine and physical checkups. Why? Because
at that time, I was only an everyday person. An everyday person will suffer from
birth, old age, illness and death. But this time, I could eliminate the root of
my illness. All this is attributed to Falun Dafa. Dafa saved me and gave me a
second life.
Another miracle was that my hemorrhoids,
lowerback and leg pain also disappeared. One loose tooth became tightened and I
felt no pain any more. I had become healthier and more agile than before I
studied the Fa. Falun Dafa is very good, and I hope all the people get to know
it.
Once the test on my physical body was over, the
heart nature test began. All six members of the family practice Dafa, four of us
are retired. A series of conflicts occurred one after another among us four
elderly people. On the surface, all the conflicts resulted from trivial everyday
matters. Two members of the family have different backgrounds and habits.
Conflicts or unhappy things sometimes occurred. This has already affected our
work for Dafa and our cultivation environment. Teacher teaches us: "Without
conflicts arising or opportunities to improve your xinxing, you cannot make
progress. If everyone is nice to one another, how do you practice
cultivation?" (Zhuan Falun)
When I recalled the whole process, I find that
actually, I did not act as a true practitioner. When the conflicts arose, I
always found fault with others, seeking external reasons but not searching
inside of myself for the reason. When I had failed to pass the previous test and
my xinxing had not been improved as it should be, the next test came up. The
tribulations became bigger and bigger. So I have a deeper understanding of that Teacher said:
"While one is in a conflict, the clashes
between each other even surpass the physical pains. I would say that the
physical pains are the easiest things to endure, as they can be overcome by
biting the teeth tightly. When a conflict takes place between one another, the
mind is the hardest thing to control." (Zhuan Falun)
I have realized passing the xinxing test is more
painful than eliminating karma, you cannot eat or sleep well because of it, and
you cannot swallow and endure it either. You become distressed the whole day
long. While passing these xinxing tests, I again thought of going back to China
to avoid this environment. But the fellow practitioners often pointed it out to
me, "Escaping from conflicts and difficulties is not a practitioner's
behavior. We should make a good use of this environment to improve our xinxing.
What we suffered cannot be compared with what the practitioners in China undergo
in the forced labor camp, in the detention centers or in the jails."
Through studying the Fa and looking inside for
the reason, I found that each time the conflict arose there was something I
needed to improve in myself and there was a need to let go of my attachment. The
major reason was that I could not tolerate. The second was I had the attachment
to fame and self-interest. I enlightened to that only on following what Teacher
said, " When you take a step back in a conflict, you will find the seas and
the skies boundless" and looking inside for the reasons, can we pass the
test on xinxing. Now our family environment is gradually improving.
Teacher said, "When human
beings come to this world, they come with nothing.... when you leave, you still
leave with nothing. What last forever? Only when you give the Fa to others can
it last forever. So that is the most precious thing. ... engaged in spreading
the Fa is most sacred." (unofficial translation of Lecture at the US
East Coast Conference)
Clarifying the truth is to offer salvation to
people, and clarifying the truth to people in China is Dafa practitioners' most
important thing to do. I would like to share some of my understandings of doing
this work.
Part I.