(Clearwisdom.net)
Recently I realize that many things are all related with the fact that I do not study the Fa well. This includes the problems and troubles that I have come across, the fundamental attachments that I have found but have not completely removed after a long time, the low efficiency in doing Dafa work, and the long-lived stubbornly held behaviors and postnatally acquired mentalities that have not been detected and eradicated.
Many times, it looks like I am very busy, but actually this kind of busyness is to have the trivial things of the ordinary world occupy my life. What's more, when I study the Fa, I am either sleepy or have an unsteady mind. When I start to study the Fa, there are always clumps of bad matter attacking me, separating me from Dafa, making my mind unclear, and causing the illusion of being muddleheaded. When I waver, I put down the book and stop studying the Fa. This kind of thing often happens.
I know very clearly that as a Dafa disciple who has obtained this precious Great Law of the universe, which is hard to come across in millions of years, it is very painful if one cannot see the inner meanings of the Fa. Recently I started to look inside and I realize that I have a big problem. I have human mindsets, therefore I am interfered with and manipulated; I have unstable factors and am thus moved by the illusion of the human world. I recalled that when facing the evil persecution, many Dafa disciples possessed a pure heart and rock-solid determination. So with Fa study, shouldn't we also manifest the indestructibility of Dafa disciples? Only if we study the Fa solidly can we have righteous thoughts and righteous actions in validating the Fa; only if we solidly study the Fa will we reduce losses to the whole body; only if we study the Fa solidly can we eradicate many of our own essential problems and deviations; only if we study the Fa solidly, can we freely apply the wisdom and abilities that the Master has entrusted to us and fully play the role of Fa rectification period Dafa disciples.
When I again picked up Dafa books to read, I strongly determined that nothing could move my heart, and I insisted on reading without being interfered by anything. Unintentionally, I read three lectures in a row. At the beginning I realized that I was removing the external interference and strengthening my will to study the Fa, yet later on I didn't know why all those factors had vanished. I then understood that they are removed during the process of Fa study: those remaining corrupt things are in fact nothing, however, they have restricted us for so long.
It's actually not hard to change this tough situation in Fa study; what is difficult is that our hearts are moved by the outside world when we let the situation be rather than eradicating it. If we start from the Fa and strengthen our hearts, the situation will change and everything will harmonize accordingly.