(Clearwisdom.net) There have been extensive experience-sharing articles about eradicating our fundamental attachments in several recent Clearwisdom Weekly magazines. I was truly inspired after reading them. For quite some time I had neglected what Teacher has asked every disciple to do well - the three things - because of my lack of diligence in cultivation. The evil old forces exploited my weaknesses, and my body experienced tribulations such as fatigue. For quite some time I could not study the Fa with a tranquil mind, feeling sleepy during Fa study, even to the point of falling asleep while holding the Dafa books. While sending righteous thoughts, I could not concentrate, or even experienced pain, especially in my legs. Most of the time, I could not do the lotus sitting position while sending righteous thoughts, and would usually end up just sitting with my legs extended. On some occasions I had a less-than-righteous state while sending righteous thoughts, such as having very bad thoughts or feeling drowsy. I could not guarantee doing the five sets of exercises each day, and a uterine cyst that had been cured reappeared. Making the situation more complex, I had earlier noticed that I was followed occasionally. My cell phone would receive calls or instant messages even if it was turned off. This situation lasted close to three months. I felt terrible in my heart, yet I could not get out of this mess.
After I read fellow practitioners' articles on eradicating our fundamental attachments, I settled down and looked within myself. I found the factors that stopped me from cultivating diligently, and dug up these fundamental attachments. I had tried to use Dafa to protect myself. I did not want to suffer any illness tribulations, or the pain of karmic cleansing. I felt that once I practiced Dafa it was like getting a guarantee that I would never get sick again. At the same time, I also had the attachments of rivalry, jealousy, showing off, and lust. I was overly concerned about whether my skin appeared smooth, firm and glowing. I was unable to take criticism, and was attached to seeking comfort. With such heavy baggage, how could I cultivate diligently?
After reading an experience sharing article by fellow practitioners on reciting the Fa, I suddenly realized that I had always treated daily Fa study and exercises as rituals and formalities. I could not ensure that I could study the Fa with a tranquil mind, as I did not put Dafa in the most prominent position. After I identified these fundamental attachments, I resolutely decided to begin learning to recite the Fa again, as I had tried earlier but had soon given up. First, I sent forth righteous thoughts to cleanse from my thoughts the fear of difficulty, trouble or hardship, the fear of being unable to memorize, as well as various bad thoughts that prevented me from memorizing the Fa. I also asked Teacher to strengthen my righteous thoughts. In this way, I first memorized Teacher's new article, "The Closer to the End, the More Diligent You Should Be." Surprisingly, the results were outstanding. I did not feel drowsy during Fa study, my spirit was very upright during righteous thoughts, and basically I could ensure doing all five sets of exercises every day. Even more unexpectedly, my child's electronic piano recital test was marked "Good," while before, the tests were all marked "Average." My child began to seize the time to study hard, having not paid much attention to it before. All homework was graded "Excellent."
I realized that this must be Teacher encouraging me, so I started to memorize Zhuan Falun. Before, it had taken me three hours to memorize one or two paragraphs, but now I could memorize two to three paragraphs in an hour or two. Even though my progress was still gradual, I had made up my mind. I will never give up memorizing the Fa. Now I do not feel sleepy in the evening, and I can finish sending righteous thoughts at 12 midnight before going to bed. I wake up at 4:20 a.m. to do the exercises. I believe that through persistently memorizing the Fa, I will definitely break through the despondency, eradicate interference from the evil old forces, and start doing the three things well again as a Fa-rectification period Dafa practitioner should.