(Clearwisdom.net) I have been translating and polishing articles for about two years, and during that period have been able to improve in my cultivation. At first I did not realize it but much later I recognized the fact that most of the articles I received contained something that directly related to my attachments or the current issues I had been dealing with. I am sure there are still many attachments I need to get rid of and unfortunately I have not been able to handle all of them well. I also hope that some day I can manage to find my deeply rooted attachments.

The following are just some of the things I realized while working on these projects and wanted to share with everyone here today.

At first when we were asked to write down our experiences, I did not know what to share and thought there was nothing to share on my part, but then I translated an article and suddenly I knew what I could write about. Here again was another article that had helped me to recognize my attachments.

I have noticed just recently that I only like articles that are well translated and "easy," so to speak, to either polish or translate. When I encountered difficult articles that I thought were not well translated, I got angry inside. When I could not understand some of the more complicated translations, I experienced negative thoughts toward the translator, even though I did not know that person and still don't personally know any translators. Hopefully, today I can meet some of them, as it is always beneficial knowing the face or person behind a name.

Generally I am able to understand most translated articles by reading them over more than once and from the perspective of a practitioner, but other times I am at a total loss as to what the translator is trying to convey. Even though I realize how difficult it must be to translate from Chinese into another language, I still had these negative emotions that rose up within me. I did not like this and was very uncomfortable even experiencing these emotions, because I knew that a cultivator should not react this way, and I asked myself, "Am I truly compassionate!?"

Since I also do translations, I truly understand that it is not always easy to translate something so that it is meaningful and understandable to people that read the article. Not only practitioners but also everyday people need to be able to understand what we are saying, thus helping them to comprehend certain things about and in their lives. As practitioners, we have the ability to understand other practitioners and what they are trying to tell us, but looking at it from the point of view of a non-practitioner, I personally feel we need to put it into language that everyone will understand, since our articles should be a guide for non-practitioners as well as for future generations.

Most of the time I manage to stay calm and try to do my best, but when I am not able to understand something and have two or three more articles waiting to be polished and/or translated, I get nervous and lose my patience, which keeps me from remaining focused. Thus my xinxing is lowered, and I have to endure more pain during meditation in making up for this self inflicted loss!

Usually when my mind can no longer focus, I take a break and return later. This has sometimes helped me to calm down and clear my mind and be able to focus again, which has surprisingly helped me understand more afterwards. I then apologize in my mind toward the person I held negative feelings against previously.

After returning to my work, and if I still do not understand or can't figure out the meaning, I simply highlight the paragraph or sentence and add a note, so that the editor or coordinator can forward it for clarification. I found this to be a better solution than getting upset due to being unable to comprehend something.

I also noticed that when I did not remember to remain calm, many bad thoughts and feelings surfaced, and then I felt very bad afterwards, because I realized that I should not have been moved but should instead simply do the best I can. I also failed to communicate with either the coordinator or the translator, thereby probably not helping these people, either. Usually due to being under pressure, or I should say, putting myself under time pressure, those are the times when mistakes happened. I know it was my own fault and I brought it upon myself, because I took on too many things at the same time. Then afterwards, when I realized that my actions were not according to Dafa and filled with many human notions, I regretted it and made a point to do better in the future. Sometimes, I succeed, but other times I fall right back into the old trap.

Through sharing with other practitioners I enlightened to the fact that it is more important to do less and do it correctly instead of wanting to be involved in everything, which is impossible, and thereby not doing a very good job and possibly leaving a negative image of Dafa.

I also realized that I wanted to do my Dafa jobs perfectly, being one of those people who cannot accept anything less than perfection. While I realize that this is not always possible, I sometimes become upset with myself, and consequently project it onto others.

This also happened when I did translations. At the beginning I was not doing very well, but with time and more experience as well as help from other practitioners, I improved. I also realized that I was not paying enough attention to certain issues and did not take the time to look up better writing styles or grammar, which could have helped improve some of my translation skills. I used the excuse that it was too time consuming, and that I needed to finish this work because these articles needed to be published.

I wasn't realizing how important it is for Dafa practitioners and everyday people to have a good impression of our articles.

When I was still employed, I always did the best job I was able to do. Later I realized that by not doing the best job I could possibly do with Dafa projects, it affected not only how people formed opinions about us and consequently Dafa but it also might have affected those people's futures.

I remembered what Teacher said in "Fa Teaching at the 2007 New York Fa Conference" when he talked about the New Year's Spectacular:

"If this was to be done well, then it must achieve the best results and truly save and rescue people. Only then would I do it, and this had to be achieved. So I couldn't do things as before. Before, Dafa disciples were doing the show part time, and now, if it was to be done, it had to be high caliber. Of course, some people said, 'Whatever Master does is sure to be done the very best.' True! If it were not the best, I wouldn't do it."

Therefore, I thought that since our teacher only does things that are the very best, I should do that, too, as should other practitioners. Then I realized that we are not perfect as long as we are here in this human world and being confronted with human notions on a daily basis. Of course, we can do things to the best of our abilities and constantly improve, thus raising our "xinxing."

I have been working hard not to let anything upset me and doing the very best I can, including taking the time to communicate more with fellow practitioners. Even in human society and regular working environments, it is important to communicate in order to resolve conflicts or issues that need to be addressed. I know this but have not always applied it in my own cultivation environment.

In the past I got upset when I read articles on Clearwisdom and found errors, then submitted the errors to the editor and did not receive a confirmation or acknowledgment. I then realized that this was also an attachment to showing off or a know-it-all mentality, wanting everything to be perfect. Even though I am far from perfect, I thought I was doing it solely for the image of Dafa.

Sometimes, even my husband pointed out that I wanted to be perfect, and I replied that I was far from being perfect. I later realized that he had simply pointed out my attachment.

Since that realization, I no longer become upset, and now can handle feedback after submitting something for correction. I am also no longer overly critical when I read articles and find typing errors, and my corrections are now being accepted.

Amazingly, I always receive articles, either for translation or polishing, that somehow depict my own attachments, and I cannot help but smile and be thankful to Master for pointing out my attachments while doing Dafa work.

I also used to get upset when an article quoted from Zhuan Falun but didn't mention the location of the quote. Sometimes the article referenced a quote in a particular lecture in Zhuan Falun, but because it did not specifically state the sub-article I had to search for it, which took more time than I wanted to spend. I also informed the coordinators a few times about this issue, and some practitioners agreed with me, while others did not, and said I should be able to find it, which of course added fuel to the flame, so to speak.

But later I realized that they were right. I should be able to find it as easily as others and put forth the effort, not just take the easy way out. Every now and then these thoughts still pop up in my mind, but I realize it immediately and tell myself that I should no longer react like this. I should act as a cultivator with compassion and tolerance.

I promise to do better, not be too critical, and have more compassion toward everyone I interact with, be it in Dafa work or otherwise.

Thank you for letting me share my thoughts. Let's help each other to do better by communicating and interacting more.