(Clearwisdom.net) Sickness karma is a fatal test we must pass in our cultivation. Owing to various reasons, some practitioners are unable to break through this test, and they have been suffering from sickness karma. Some practitioners simply cannot let go of the thought of "being sick," so they suffer all kinds of tribulations. They think their sickness is inevitable, and they develop a passive and pessimistic attitude. When their condition gets serious, it even affects their belief in Dafa. Some practitioners even die, which is a loss for Dafa.

Not long ago I attended a small experience sharing meeting. During the sharing one practitioner talked about her experience in conquering her illness. It was very inspiring, so I wrote it down and hope practitioners who are suffering from sickness karma can learn some lessons from it.

The practitioner, a woman of about 50, looked very healthy and fit and exuded energy in how she talked and acted. No one could believe that she had had a terminal illness just a year ago.

In the autumn of 2008, she developed serious symptoms. She was in pain, could not eat, and could not sleep well. When her family took her to a hospital for tests, she was diagnosed with "terminal liver cancer." The doctor said, "At most she has three months to live." Her family began to prepare for her funeral.

After learning the news, local practitioners went to see her. Most of them thought that she was dying, so they only went there to comfort her. Some even advised her to go to the hospital where at least her pain could be eased. Since she was influential in the local area, other practitioners worried that when she died, it would bring losses to Dafa. In short, there were all kinds of thoughts, but it seemed that no one thought she could pass this test. During her tribulation, fellow practitioners not only failed to give her any support but caused her interference. She was very disappointed.

She thought to herself how she had always been in good health and had always done the three things Teacher asked of practitioners. Some might say she was not that diligent, but she had never skipped Fa study or doing the exercises. Then why would she suffer such a tribulation, and what loopholes had the evil forces taken advantage? She looked inward but failed to find the answer. Although there were some xinxing issues, they should not cause such a big problem. One day she suddenly recalled that, about six months before, she learned that a chicken farm was culling its chickens. They were fairly cheap, so, she bought over a dozen. Since practitioners cannot kill lives, she went to the market and paid a butcher to kill them. At the time she thought that something was not right so she felt a kind of uneasiness. However, she tried to comfort herself, "I did not kill them. They were killed by someone else, so it is not as if I were killing them." But now she realized this had been purely self-deception, and it was really her own sin. Employing people to kill was no different than killing them herself, as she was the one really responsible for the deaths of those chickens. She knew that, for her own personal desire, she had employed someone else to kill in an attempt to shift the blame. That thought was even worse and would double her sin. She suddenly realized her sickness karma had something to do with the killing of those chickens. Her creditors had come to her to demand payment as well as lives. In the meantime, the evil forces also took the advantage and began to persecute her.

After realizing the root cause of her sickness karma, she felt very relieved. At the time she bought the chickens, another practitioner went with her and also bought and had some chickens killed. This other practitioner also developed serious symptoms of sickness. Therefore, she phoned the other practitioner and shared her understanding of the issue.

Also, whenever she sent forth the righteous thoughts to eliminate the evil forces, she clearly told them, "It's my fault that you were harmed. When I reach consummation, I will settle the issue benevolently and make a good arrangement for you. But for now, you'd better leave." She knew that the symptoms were a false appearance that served two purposes: to re-pay the debt and to be upgraded in the Fa. She sent a very strong thought from the bottom of her heart: "I must pass the test, and I can pass the test! I am not afraid of death; however, I cannot die like this because it would reflect negatively on Dafa. What's more, I haven't fulfilled my mission, and I have a lot of things to do. I can bear the responsibility of causing this karma, but I cannot die like this." At the time, she was only concerned about Dafa and did not think about her "sickness." At the same time, she held a steadfast belief in Dafa, and she faintly thought that it would be an opportunity to validate the Fa. She believed that a miracle would happen, and Dafa would give her the strength to help her to pass this tribulation of life and death.

Since her family worried about her "sickness" and fellow practitioners also brought interference, she simply left home to work in other parts of the country. She was very busy every day, and whenever she had time, she would study the Fa, practice the exercises, and clarify the truth. Only her job took time away from her doing the three things. Upon returning home four months later her health had been fully restored. She also had earned 5,000 yuan. She returned to the hospital for a check up. Indeed, her cancer had disappeared, and all the tests indicated she was normal. The doctors were very surprised at her recovery. Through her tribulations, everyday people had witnessed the miracle of Dafa.

This practitioner did not provide details of her suffering during those four months. She only calmly said, "I had to pay what I owed and endure what I had to endure!" One can imagine that those four months were definitely not smooth sailing and that her suffering must have been enormous. In that time she lost 30 kilos (66 pounds). Yet, despite those four long months of suffering, she always maintained very strong righteous thoughts. Had her righteous thoughts not been that strong or had she slacked off a bit, maybe she would not have passed the test or the test would have been longer. This practitioner truly let go of life and death, and her steadfastness is admirable.

Regrettably, the other practitioner that bought chickens with her failed to pass her own test of sickness karma, and she died. The two practitioners had faced the same issue of killing and then suffering from the same sickness karma; however, different thoughts caused very different results. Cultivation is really a serious matter.

Teacher said in "Teaching the Fa in Manhattan:"

"As for some isolated issues that have come about, I prefer not to say anything more, for you have gained composure and know that nothing is by chance, that there is a reason. My hope is that your righteous thoughts may be a bit stronger, that you may be a bit more diligent in your cultivation, and not allow the evil to exploit your gaps. If our Dafa disciples can manage to do this, you will suffer less harm. Clarifying the facts at this point in time very much requires manpower, and if sentient beings are to be saved, it will take participation from more people. More people need to be involved in the variety of projects that aim to snuff out the evil's persecution. In this light, then, a great deal of strength is lost when there is one less person, and a great deal of strength is gained when there is one more set of hands. So I don't wish to leave a single person behind, nor do I want to lose them or let them depart too soon. There is no more question of Dafa disciples achieving Consummation. However, were you to depart early, it would undermine what Dafa disciples are trying to achieve, and it would amount to allowing the old forces to exploit your gaps. This is a time when manpower is really needed. Don't allow that kind of loss to happen. I would like to see everyone try his best to do well, have ample righteous thoughts, and avoid any losses."

My personal opinion is that, during the final stage of Fa-rectification, the evil forces are rampant. They will take advantage of every loophole the practitioners may have to persecute them, aggravate the sickness karma, and drag away practitioners whose righteous thoughts are not that strong. However, Teacher clearly stated in his Fa lectures: When our righteous thoughts are strong and we really believe in Teacher and the Fa, we can discard human notions, let go of life and death, and we can pass this test.