(Minghui.org) I was very fragile when I was little, and my mom always took extra good care of me. I treated everything very lightly—that is, I didn't think too much about things.
I was born with heart disease (an atrial septal defect). I should have had an operation to correct it, because the doctors said that the problem would surface around age 20. Before I graduated from college, I experienced heart attach symptoms. I didn't tell my mom about it when I finished my studies and returned home.
My mom had just started practicing Falun Gong at the time. She only knew that the book Zhuan Falun was good. She hoped that I would read it before I went out into society to get a job, in order to improve my xinxing and character.
My mom asked me to watch Master's video lectures with her. I sat down to listen to them and quickly fell asleep. In order to make my mom happy, I read Zhuan Falun . I didn't notice that my heart problem had disappeared.
My thoughts were still quiet--I didn't think much about things. I spoke to my mom about this. At the time, she and I were busy going to work every day; we didn't find time to study the Fa and do the exercises well and consequently missed many precious cultivation opportunities.
The persecution of Falun Gong started on July 20, 1999. Because I was rarely in contact with other practitioners, I wasn't aware of many things that happened at that time. All the state-run media slandered Falun Gong.
Employees were organized to watch the news on TV. Everyone had to write a criticism article, and Falun Gong books had to be turned in. My mom and I didn't listen to them.
However, after these things took place, I became a true practitioner. My mother and I had the thought at the time that if any practitioner called us, we would go to Beijing to seek justice for Master and Dafa. We would ride a bike there if necessary.
At the start of the persecution, the truth-clarification materials we had to inform people about Falun Gong were seriously deficient. And because it was too risky to photocopy Master's new articles in a shop, we had to pass around the few that we had.
In 2001 my mom suggested buying a computer and other equipment to make our own materials. I knew nothing about these things at the time. My biggest shortcoming was my reluctance try anything if I didn't understand it. But my mother didn't care. These things were expensive at the time: we spent over 8,000 yuan for a good computer and other equipment.
Practitioners' cultivation experience sharing articles often say: “As long as you have the heart to do it, Master will arrange everything for you.” How true that is. Once the computer arrived, my mom went to see an uncle, a practitioner who was just released from a forced labor camp. He called another practitioner a little older than I to teach me to use the equipment we purchased. I started by learning how to use the mouse.
We contacted another practitioner, who sent Minghui articles to us regularly. After we downloaded the articles, my mom and I read them first, then selected some of them and designed the layout. Then we printed them for other practitioners to distribute.
One day when we downloaded articles, Master's photo demonstrating how to send forth righteous thought appeared. We were very excited! There are no words to express it; we immediately pressed our palms together and bowed to Master.
When the persecution was severe, every complany held an exhibition to slander Dafa. They made everyone go see it. I really didn't want to see it, and I hoped other people would also fail to see it. The next day when I came in, the pictures had all fallen on the floor! I didn't understand at that time that it was Master strengthening my supernormal ability. I went home very happy to tell my mom about it.
An exhibition to slander Dafa was once held in the local stadium. I went home and printed self-adhesive posters to stick on a notice board at a bus station across from the exhibition center. As I was doing it, someone came up and asked what I was doing. I handed one to him and said, “Here it is--you can read it yourself! Then I left on my bike. Master is truly alongside us, and as long as we want to clarify the truth, Master protects and strengthens us!
At the time, because there were not many materials production sites, we were very busy making materials. Because we left Fa study, doing the exercises, and sending forth righteous thoughts behind, the evil forces took advantage of this loophole, and my mom was arrested.
It was really hard when my mom wasn't there. I had to do everything myself. I had to buy groceries, cook, and wash clothes. In the past when I encountered sickness karma, my mom was there, my tribulation was small, and I could pass it with just a little effort. After my mom was arrested, without her to help, I passed a major sickness karma test.
My employer arranged for us to have a health exam every year. Five years ago, a doctor told me I had a swollen kidney; I didn't take it seriously. The following year, a doctor told me that I had a kidney stone causing the hydronephrosis. I still didn't take it seriously, nor did I tell my mom about it. Although I didn't accept it, I didn't pay attention to rejecting it. After my mom was arrested, I suddenly had pain in my abdominal area. The pain spread to my entire back and my private parts. I also had blood in my urine. It lasted for half a month, but I still ignored it and endured the pain to go to work.
One evening, I was in so much pain that I couldn't stand up. At that time, without Master's strengthening, I absolutely wasn't able to ride a bike, let alone ride a long way home!
As soon as I got home, I wanted to read Zhuan Falun . But I was too weak to hold the book. There was no one to talk to. Nobody could help me. But I still held one thought: "If I can't read, I can listen; I believe in Master!"
I went to bed and put the MP3 earphones in my ears. I listened to Master lecture all night. I was half asleep and half awake. All night I felt my body floating up to heaven for a while and then back down, floating up and down all night. The next day, I felt that the enormous pain was almost gone--there was only a little left. I went to work as usual. Two days later, a fingernail-sized stone came out in my urine. Since then all my symptoms have disappeared. At this year's exam, everything was normal.
When my mom was being persecuted, I passed a big tribulation. I went to work every day, and didn't take any days off. Without Master's merciful protection, how could I have overcome this tribulation in such a short time? I knew a few people who had kidney stones that were treated for a long time and took a lot of medicine but still weren't any better. They even stayed in the hospital, but weren't cured. I had Master looking after me; how happy I was!
After my mother was released, we looked inward to find our attachments and loopholes. We understood this Fa principle: “Cultivation is serious, ...” (“An Explicit Reminder” in Essentials for Further Advancement)
We decided that, to give me more time to study the Fa and do the exercises, my mom would rarely ask me to do anything except validate the Fa. We produced pamphlets, DVDs, bookmarks, and self-adhesive posters. Whatever practitioners needed, we would produce. Sometimes we temporarily had to produce extra materials when the police damaged other production sites.
My mom and I produced materials for several years. We can say that we didn't have the attachment of fear. Dafa efforts were the most sacred issues in our minds, and we completely committed ourselves to it. Master said:
“The old forces don't dare to oppose our clarifying the truth or saving sentient beings. What's key is to not let them take advantage of the gaps in your state of mind when you do things.” (“Teaching the Fa at the 2002 Fa Conference in Boston”)
Through Fa-study, we understood that we didn't solidly study the Fa, thus we didn't completely believe in Master and Dafa, and our efforts did not display Dafa's mighty virtue. That meant that the strength of our efforts to save people wasn't great. We only did things like it was a job; we slacked off in our Fa-study and in our cultivation. Many human attachments were created from time to time. The key is that saving people is a sacred issue, but we put more weight on how many things we as practitioners did and did not consider saving people in our first thought. We just did things for practitioners' needs. Because of this, the old forces certainly took advantage of the loopholes.
When we studied the Fa earnestly, we found that Master repeatedly reminded us in many lectures to: “... study the Fa more.”; “... study the book of Fa well.” (“Teaching the Fa at the Fa Conference in Australia”); “You must study the Fa, ...” (“Fa-Lecture at the Conference in Florida, U.S.A”) and “... no matter how busy you are you have to study the Fa.” (“Touring North America to Teach the Fa”)
Master said:
“What I'm saying is, during your cultivation you have to seize the day and cultivate yourselves well. No matter how busy you are or how many things you have to do, you can't neglect your own Fa study and cultivation. It's the fundamental guarantee that you'll do well in validating the Fa, and it's also a guarantee that you'll be able to make it to the last step.” (“Teaching and Explaining the Fa at the Metropolitan New York Fa Conference”)
We shouldn't be like a machine that only knows how to work--we must truly cultivate ourselves.
My mom and I now study the Fa solidly. We have started to understand what cultivation is and the solemn nature of cultivation.
Again, thank you, great Master. I cannot find the words to express my gratitude for Master's compassionately saving my life.