(Minghui.org) I read Minghui articles daily, and some of them describe how fellow practitioners overcome tribulations. One such article today helped me greatly, because it targeted my problem. The article was titled Active Cultivation or Passive Cultivation? I am grateful for Master's hint and the fellow practitioner's sharing.
I recently experienced illness karma, and it got worse today. My abdomen really hurt. I was in a cold sweat, felt dizzy, and was out of breath and nauseated.
My abdomen started aching several days ago. It seemed like menstrual pain. At first I took it lightly and had only one thought, “I began practicing Falun Dafa two years and two months ago, so I am still a relatively new practitioner. This is the first time I have experienced karma elimination. Is Master eliminating my karma?” However, as soon as such a thought surfaced, my abdomen ached worse than ever.
I was aware that I was holding onto a wrong thought, so I immediately sent righteous thoughts to eliminate the bad elements. I felt much better at night. But my abdomen still hurt. I talked to my abdomen, “Go ahead and continue aching. I am not going to pay any attention to you.” I walked faster than ever, and the pain in my abdomen lessened. I came to realize that such pain was not karma elimination. It was actually persecution from the old forces.
Though I constantly negated it, the pain worsened as time went by. I thought, “There must be somewhere that I didn't do well.” I kept looking inside, and finally identified many attachments, including lust, comfort, greed, and competitiveness. I sent righteous thoughts to eliminate them. I felt better, but my situation did not fundamentally change.
The practitioner who wrote the article “Active Cultivation or Passive Cultivation?” said that he had been busy for several months working two jobs, and had no time to do the three things. As a result, his cultivation state worsened. He was sleepy in the evenings and couldn't study the Fa well. He later became more diligent in doing the three things well. He began studying the Fa and practicing the exercises no matter how tired he was, and he didn't skip any of the four global times to send forth righteous thoughts, no matter how busy he was. Two months later, his situation had changed fundamentally.
This hit home, because my cultivation state had not been good since the Chinese New Year. I was always sleepy at night while studying the Fa, and I couldn't get up early in the morning. Additionally, my mind was not clear when sending righteous thoughts. When it was time to send righteous thoughts, I always fell asleep and slept for at least one hour.
For a long time I didn't do the exercise movements well. I couldn't complete the first four exercises in the morning. I was interfered with at work, as I was always busy.
After reading “Active Cultivation or Passive Cultivation?” I realized what was happening—I didn't do the three things well. I had been harboring the notion that I could do those things well only after my cultivation state improved. But actually, that's not right! I was confusing cause and effect. Dafa practitioners can reach a good cultivation state and have strong righteous thoughts only by doing the three things well.
Though I told myself dainly to keep righteous thoughts and a clear mind, it was of no use because I used human means. However, the old forces are gods. If we don't improve to the level that we should reach, the old forces are able to interfere, no matter how hard we try to keep a clear mind using human means. As Dafa practitioners, our only path of cultivation is doing the three things well. All other efforts are in vain.
I believe now that I was actually being persecuted by the old forces. The old forces are very persistent in interfering with us when we don't do the three things well. How evil they are! I now understand why Teacher constantly tells us to negate the old forces. Only by doing this can we truly cultivate in Dafa.
The Fa-rectification has now entered its final stage, and new practitioners are joining regularly. I would like to tell them, “Although we are new practitioners, we could enter into Dafa during this final stage only because we had predestined relationships. We shouldn't acknowledge the evil arrangements by the old forces. Let's put 'doing the three things well' in the first place, cultivate diligently together, reach consummation, and return home with Teacher.”
If you find anything inappropriate, please kindly point it out.