(Minghui.org) Nothing much worried me, and I handled cultivation issues rather well a while ago. That is because some of my attachments had not had an opportunity to surface yet. However, I met with some interference recently, so I had to look within and improve my cultivation state.
For a practitioner, some attachments are obvious. Others are deeply hidden and only appear when conflicts allow us to see them and let go of them.
I realize now that I was walking an incorrect path because of my vanity, as well as attachments to showing off, fame, zealotry, saving face, etc. Those attachments prevented me from moving forward diligently.
People considered me to be someone with talent. I was attached to a lot of surface things such as my voice, my handwriting, my appearance, my clothes, etc. Those things kept magnifying my vanity, even though they are actually external things and nothing to brag about.
Master said,
“To tell you the truth, the entire cultivation process for a practitioner is one of constantly giving up human attachments.” (Zhuan Falun)
Whenever we see an attachment, we should let it go. All attachments are obstacles on the path of cultivation, and we should eliminate them.
I developed some bad habits to the point where I didn't even realize I was doing them. For example, our classmates had a reunion in the summer. We hadn't seen each other for many years. Several days after the reunion, I was still thinking about who had really made it to powerful, high-ranking positions, and who was very wealthy. I talked about these people to my colleagues and relatives. I couldn't help myself. I wanted to show how capable my classmates were. I later realized that this is a kind of showing off. I was doing it to build myself up. I knew that I should eliminate the attachment right away.
I talked more than I should at work and got told off by a supervisor. I was upset and didn't want to have anything more to do with that person. A few days later, my father scolded me at a wedding. I felt embarrassed in front of my relatives.
I can't handle it well when others criticize me, so I have to continually face the same kind of test. I know I must let it go, regardless of how bad I feel.
In Dafa, we cultivate ourselves and rectify ourselves so that we can return to our true home.