(Minghui.org) After a failed spinal surgery, I was nearly paralyzed for 16 years until I was introduced to Falun Dafa. I became completely functional after I started to follow its teachings. My life was filled with hope once more.
A routine hospital exam revealed a fluid-filled cyst growing inside my spinal cord. A top neurousurgeon told me that I would be paralyzed in 10 years if it wasn’t operated on right away. I didn’t want to have surgery, but he urged me do it as soon as possible. He left me his phone number and told me that he would be happy to do it.
In 1996 out of nowhere, a local brain surgeon called me and told me that there were experts wanting to operate on my spine. I eventually agreed, reluctantly, after the doctor and my friends tirelessly encouraged me to have it done.
The five-hour-long brain surgery was worse than hell. I could feel everything even though I was anesthetized. As the drill penetrated my skull, I could feel the vibrations, like someone throwing rocks in my head.
Twenty days later the experts came and asked me to get out of the bed and move around. I couldn’t. A year later I took my MRI images to the expert to see where the problem was. He claimed that the surgery was successful. When I told him that I couldn’t even get on a bus by myself, he told me that I would’ve been paralyzed if I hadn’t had the surgery. At that moment I knew that I had been deceived into being his guinea pig in a trial surgery.
I gradually lost my motor functions. My muscles got weaker and weaker and started to waste away. My neck was stiff and my shoulders twisted. I could barely do the simplest daily activities such as get dressed and eat. I refused to socialize and lived alone, full of resentment, regret, and pain.
I learned Falun Dafa in 2012 from a relative. I regained my health and let go of my resentment. I knew that all my suffering was not a coincidence and that it was the result of all the bad things I did before. Also, the suffering had led me to Falun Dafa.
“Having heard the Dao in the morning, one can die in the evening.” (“Melt Into the Fa” from Essentials for Further Advancement)
All the complaints, regrets, and grudges I'd harbored over the past dozen years disappeared in no time. I was determined to be a steadfast practitioner.
One night I was awakened by my alarm, but I was shocked to find that it didn’t have a battery installed. When I looked at my watch and saw it was 3:20 in the morning, I knew that it was Master who woke me up to do the exercises. He’s always there to help me.
I learned how to use a computer in 2015. In July, I typed up and submitted a complaint against Jiang Zemin, who started the persecution of Falun Gong in 1999. By December I knew how to download and print out fliers that were used to clarify the truth. I even knew how to fix my printer. I couldn’t even dream of doing any of these things before. Master and Dafa endowed me with these abilities to help with Fa rectification.
In the past five years I have read Zhuan Falun at least 300 times and memorized it twice. Memorizing Zhuan Falun was the most difficult thing I'd ever attempted. It took me ten months to memorize it the first time and I soon forgot it all. The second time it took me four months. I also read other lectures as I looked within to improve myself.
Last year my daughter and son-in-law brought me two shirts and wanted me to pick one. Neither one fit me and I was annoyed. I told my daughter to give them to her mother-in-law. My daughter insisted I keep one because my son-in-law had bought it for me. The next day a friend stopped by and I told her, “They always get me clothes that don’t fit. I don’t know anyone who wants it.” That afternoon I was mad about it and I began to recall all the things that annoyed me in the past. My anger spun out of control.
Suddenly I recalled a passage of the Fa teachings:
“Do you realize that as long as you’re a cultivator, in any environment or under any circumstances, I will use any troubles or unpleasant things you come across—even if they involve work for Dafa, or no matter how good or sacred you think they are—to eliminate your attachments and expose your demon-nature so that it can be eliminated, for your improvement is what’s most important.” (“Further Understanding” from Essentials for Further Advancement”
Everything was suddenly clear to me and I knew that Master was using this incident to improve my xinxing. I found my attachments to showing off, jealousy, and wanting to save face. I apologized to my son-in-law and thanked him for his kindness.