(Minghui.org) During the summer break, several of us practitioners decided to systematically study Master's Fa lectures given outside of China.
One day I read:
“As long as you’ve obtained Dafa your illness will be cured, but the goal isn’t to heal you. He didn’t want to cultivate according to our Dafa’s requirements, nor did he want to be a cultivator. He only wanted to get rid of his illness. But could this solemn Dafa be imparted to him for the purpose of healing illness? No. So he also knew, “Oh, as long as I don’t mention treating illness and don’t ask Teacher to heal me, Teacher will surely cure my illness in due time.” You see, he didn’t say it verbally and he might have even stopped mentioning his illness to anyone, but after a long period of time he was still thinking deep inside, “As long as I do the exercises Teacher is sure to heal me in due time.” He was still thinking about it like that. That tiny deviation made for a real, fundamental difference. That tiny bit of deviation revealed his true nature: He was still concerned with getting healed.” (Teaching the Fa at the Conference in Europe)
I asked myself, “This issue was common among practitioners at the time. Then are we all okay in this regard now?” So I started to examine my own cultivation and was surprised to find that I harbored many such thoughts that this teaching touched upon.
Because of the Chinese Communist Party's (CCP) persecution policy, I was fired from my job. To make a living, my wife, who is also a practitioner, and I opened a convenience store. At the time, we often drove to the nearby villages to tell people the facts about Falun Gong, and having a convenience store seemed to be a hindrance to such activities. Fellow practitioners shared with us their understanding that, as long as we took saving people as the top priority, Master would arrange everything for us and the convenience store was bound to be profitable.
With such thoughts in mind, we spent half a day doing Dafa activities and half a day at the store. I always said to myself at the time, “We have put Dafa in the most important place, so Master will certainly help us make more money with minimal time while spending the saved time on saving more people.”
After some time, however, our store did not do well and we had to sell it. I was puzzled, but I knew I must have fallen short of the Fa in some regard. After reading this paragraph, I finally enlightened to it. We opened the store to earn a living while doing Dafa activities at the same time. But in the process, I had not been able to let go of my attachment to making a decent living. On the superficial level, I had seemingly put Dafa as the top priority. But I was hoping Master would take care of us and our store in turn. How was I different from the practitioner who was thinking of his curing illnesses? I did not achieve the level of truly entrusting everything to Master and not worrying about my personal interests.
The same issue came up in many other forms. For instance, one practitioner was concerned that others could enlighten to the Fa from reading the book while he could not. Others then told him that he should not keep in mind the pursuit of becoming enlightened to certain Fa from reading the book. As Master taught us, “Keep in mind: One should gain things naturally without pursuing them.” (“Learning the Fa,” Essentials For Further Advancement)
When he heard this, he reminded himself not to be attached to pursuing things while still thinking, “Master will grant me the enlightenment as long as I am pursuing it.” After a long time, he still did not get any enlightenment and thus became doubtful of Dafa. Others could all see that his attachment was never truly eliminated but hidden more deeply. How could he see the Fa he was eagerly trying to pursue?
This issue was also illustrated in the form of overcoming illness karma. A fellow practitioner suffering illness knew that he must search within. As Master taught us, “Remove your human thoughts and evil will naturally die out” (Don't Be Sad, Hong Yin Vol II)
So he said to himself, “I must look inside for my human notions and Master will then rectify everything for me.” Then he found some attachments and thought, “I have done my part. Master will surely take care of me.” After a while, he was disappointed that his illness was not cured. He started to waver and became doubtful of Dafa. Thus his illness became even more severe. No matter what he thought or said, he did not eliminate his attachment to having Master cure his illness. The bottom line was that he did not let go of his attachment to his illness. Looking inside was done in the hope that Master would solve his problem of illness. It was not true cultivation. How could Master resolve it for him?
Another issue was how to help fellow practitioners who are in illness karma. Most of us have the good intention to help our fellow practitioners overcome their illnesses and would tell them they should search within. We were trying to change others but not ourselves.
Then, as practitioners gained more and more experience sharing with those practitioners in illness karma, most of us seemed to realize that fellow practitioners' illnesses were meant for our own cultivation. The consensus was that, if we all looked inside ourselves and cultivated well, our fellow practitioners' illnesses would be cured. Then what was the purpose of our cultivating ourselves? To help the fellow practitioners cure their illnesses? Was that true cultivation and a pure intention to change ourselves?
I think we should not focus our efforts on solving the problem of illness karma but on the uplifting of our cultivation level as a whole group, including the ill practitioner. We are here to cultivate and assimilate to Dafa. If we all have a pure mind and improve as a whole, whether the illness karma exists or not does not make a difference. The incorrect situation will be rectified naturally.
As Fa-rectification nears the end, I have found some practitioners still harbor the attachment to achieving consummation, although it is not very obvious. Practitioners have been busy every day and strive to do the three things well, because we have all heard Master's Fa on not achieving consummation without doing well the three things. One practitioner thought, “OK. I will just do the three things. When the time comes, I will certainly achieve consummation.” So he put all his time and effort into doing the three things and had a packed schedule every day. When he heard others talking about consummation, he would say, “Why are you concerned about that? If you have done the three things well, how can Master not have you reach consummation?” In fact, he had not eliminated the attachment to achieving consummation and the purpose of his doing the three things was consummation. In other words, the attachment to consummation drove him to do the three things. This was not true cultivation, nor was it the three things Master wanted. Master taught us,
“Then is being attached to reaching Consummation an attachment? Isn’t it also an attachment born of human desire? Would a Buddha be attached to reaching Consummation? As a matter of fact, those cultivators who are truly approaching Consummation don’t have this attachment.” (Eliminate Your Last Attachment(s), Essentials for Further Advancement II)
We have all heard Master say, “Thus, Falun can save oneself by rotating inward and save others by rotating outward.” (Zhuan Falun)
When this is manifested in our Fa-rectification period cultivation, it is cultivating ourselves and assimilating to Dafa, helping others out of good will, and saving the sentient beings. Our true nature is such. Therefore, we should act according to it, regardless of whether we are faced with illness karma, abduction or other persecution, or conflicts among practitioners. We should stick to it no matter how the environment changes. We will be able to rectify everything that needs to be rectified, which will be the true manifestation of the power of Dafa, each and every Dafa particle, and our true selves.
This is my personal understanding at my current stage. Fellow practitioners, please point out anything that falls short of the Fa.