(Minghui.org) I have been cultivating Falun Dafa for over 22 years. When I first began practicing, I did not know how to cultivate myself and almost lost my chance. But Master guided me step by step and helped me become what I am today. I am deeply grateful for Master's saving grace!
Before I began to practice, I cared a great deal about my reputation and what others thought of me. I enjoyed helping others and their positive feedback. After I had cultivated for a year, I began to run into tests to eliminate those attachments.
A friend asked me to take a computer exam for her nephew who had a great job opportunity. I turned her down immediately. I did not like cheating like that even before I was a cultivator. I knew it was not right, and told her that I practiced Falun Dafa now and could not do such things.
A young fellow in my office overheard our conversation. He knew that I did not want to do it but that I also did not want to let her down. He volunteered to help. I turned him down but he insisted. I thought that since he was not a cultivator, it might be alright. So I called my friend and gave her the option.
When I had lunch that day, a fish bone got stuck in my throat. I tried everything to get it out, but nothing worked. I remembered what Master once said:
“I hold that there’s no such thing as “natural phenomena,” as all things are ordered—coincidence doesn’t exist.” (Teaching the Fa at the Conference in Europe)
I realized immediately that I had made a mistake. I went to Master's picture and apologized, and admitted that I’d done wrong. I felt that Master had helped me, but I was not sure, as my throat still hurt. I thought I should let go of the fear and doubt. And guess what, the fish bone was gone!
I realized that this was an opportunity for me to improve, but I was afraid to offend my friend or affect my reputation. I was trying to protect myself, even at the cost of letting my colleague generate karma. I realized that I could no longer behave like an ordinary person. As a cultivator, one has to meet the standard.
I decided to tell my friend that neither I nor my colleague would be able to help her nephew. To my surprise, before I got a chance to call her, she called me and said she no longer needed help with her nephew's computer exam.
This incident made me realize that cultivation really is a serious matter.
Because I did not pass the first test well, I soon faced another test.
A classmate of mine from college called me one day. He was going to be promoted and asked me to help him with two dissertations, which were the prerequisite for his promotion. I realized this was a test, so I told him that I could not help. But he insisted and kept asking me to help him. I agreed.
I called one of our college teachers regarding the dissertations. To my surprise, he said he could prepare them for me right away and asked me to pick them up the next day! I did not know what to do. If I didn’t go, I would be sorry that I wasted his time; if I did, I’d be violating Dafa's principles again.
I ended up picking up the ghostwritten papers and failed to pass the test.
When I did the exercises one morning after this incident, I saw through my celestial eye that a door to the teaching building that had always stayed open was locked. Why did I notice that?
I realized that my cultivation was in major trouble, but I didn't know what to do.
I went to a fellow practitioner's home to study the Fa together every day. I measured myself against the Fa teachings in everything I said, did, and thought. My xinxing improved little by little.
One day when I was doing the exercises, I again saw the locked door of the teaching building, but it was different. The door was still locked but there was a key in the lock. Several days later when I was meditating, I saw a set of keys in my hand! Tears ran down my face. I knew that compassionate Master had not given up on me, and that he wanted me to open the door of cultivation myself once again!
The standards of behavior have gone downhill at a terrible pace and I had gone along with it instead of behaving like a cultivator. Thanks to Master's reminders, I learned how to handle such situations while maintaining the standard of a cultivator.
As a cultivator, one cannot go with the flow and follow social trends. One has to measure oneself with the standard of Dafa.
When my daughter was about to graduate from college, she was very worried about her future. She complained that I did not love or care about her and that I did not use my connections to help her find a good job like many other parents do.
I told her that as a cultivator, I could not go along with something that was not honest. “We follow the course of nature – if it is yours, no one can take it away from you, and if it is not yours, you won't get it even if you fight for it, ” I said.
My daughter knew some Fa teachings, but she was not yet a cultivator. Her worry and anxiety about her future worsened her stress and made it hard to reason with her at times. One day, she came back with a form – her school offered several jobs openings but we first had to pay 60,000 yuan.
I knew that this occurred to test how solid I had cultivated. I could not let sentimentality get the best of me. I was determined to do what was right. I told her that I wouldn't support finding a job like that. My daughter was upset with me and stormed out of the house. She went to find her father who’d divorced me when I was being persecuted and sent to a forced labor camp. Her father was also concerned about her future, even though he had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and was short of cash. He offered her the payment anyway.
It was difficult, but I had to calm down and talk to my daughter. I told her that her father was terminally ill and that he might need the money for his treatment. She began to cry. I told her that she had been born into a cultivator's family, that cultivators are blessed, but that we have to meet the standard. I reminded her of the many miracles that had happened to me as well as to her over the years and that Master had always protected us. I said that we should let go of the worry, be considerate of others, and do what is right. She calmed down, too, after our talk.
Two days later, my daughter shouted with excitement in her room. She showed me a text message from her school that said she’d been recommended for a job interview. She landed a great job without paying a penny!
I am deeply grateful for Master's compassionate protection over the past 22 years. Master reminded and inspired me whenever I was not clear about the Fa teachings, and guided me back on the right track. I cherish this opportunity and I will cultivate solidly and diligently on the last leg of my cultivation path.
Thank you, Master! Thank you, Falun Dafa!