(Minghui.org) My cultivation state has not been stable for a long time because I relaxed, and dealt with issues as though I were an ordinary person, not a practitioner.
My situation improved after I began reading articles on the Minghui website every evening. Afterwards, I reviewed the day's events. By comparing my behavior with practitioners I read about, I thought about where I could improve. Even though I improved, I felt it wasn't enough.
I began to memorize the Fa by reciting Zhuan Falun every morning, and memorizing Teacher's poems and other articles. I memorized Zhuan Falun one paragraph at a time. As soon as I memorized a paragraph, I went to the next one without reviewing what I had finished.
My mind wandered when I was first memorizing the Fa, and I just memorized the words. Then, I told myself that my main consciousness had to learn the teachings. I didn’t care about the quantity. I focused on memorizing one word at a time and I did it slowly. As I recited each word they appeared before my eyes. I could feel that every cell of my body was assimilating to Dafa. This time my mind did not wander.
Teacher exposed my attachment to jealousy when I memorized the section on jealousy. I understood how dangerous jealousy was. It could cause one to become irrational, have negative thoughts, and lose compassion. I gained a new understanding of Teacher's Fa.
Master said,
“Jealousy is a serious problem since it directly bears on whether a person can achieve spiritual perfection. If you can’t rid yourself of jealousy it will undermine all of the work you have done on your character.” (The Seventh Talk, Zhuan Falun)
“Now that I’ve explained this to you, who are practitioners, you really need to stop this folly. You must be free of jealousy if you want to ever reach heaven. And it is for this reason that I’ve singled it out.” (The Seventh Talk, Zhuan Falun)
Whenever I encounter conflicts, I think of Teacher's words:
“In our discipline you are the one who gains spiritually by working through challenges...” (The Eighth Talk, Zhuan Falun)
I no longer want to be my former self, getting upset when others treat me badly. I no longer feel wronged. I always remember that I'm a cultivator. When conflicts arise I am able to identify my attachments that surface and eliminate them. I keep getting hints from Teacher in the process.
I used to have a bad habit of figuring things out when my mind was free. How should I do this thing or that thing? I thought about all kinds of things. I fell twice because I was so absent minded.
My mind has become clearer and cleaner since I began memorizing the Fa. I memorized the Fa whenever I walked. I've now finished memorizing part of Hong Yin III.
To stop my mind from wandering while I memorize, I focus my mind on each and every word. This is very helpful in strengthening my main consciousness.
While I memorized Teacher's poem “Why is human life always so difficult?” (“Honor Permits No Looking Back,” Hong Yin III), I no longer treated “difficulties” with ordinary people's notions and avoided them like I used to. I compared my difficulties based on the Fa's principles.
In the process of memorizing the Fa, I identified the problems that existed in my Fa studies all these years. I had always focused on quantity and speed, and I did not internalize the Fa, therefore I could not understand the deeper meanings behind the words.
Teacher said:
“So now you know the two reasons why people might not get results with their practice: one is that they can’t make spiritual progress if they don’t have the higher guidance of the Way; and the other is that they won’t get higher energy if they don’t work on themselves or strive to perfect their character. These two reasons sum it up.” (The First Talk, Zhuan Falun)
When one doesn't concentrate on the words when one is reading Master's teachings, one is being disrespectful to Teacher and Dafa. The inner meanings of the Fa at different levels will not manifest themselves. Only when one sincerely studies the Fa can one internalize the Fa, and it will guide one's cultivation.
Memorizing the Fa changed my cultivation state. I didn’t know how to look inward, but now I do. I didn’t know how to cultivate, but now I do. I now know how to talk to people about the persecution. Studying the Fa well truly made me more efficient in doing everything. Only by learning the Fa well can one break away from human notions and walk towards the divine.