(Minghui.org) Both my parents died when I was little. As a result, I spent a lot of my youth by myself, living a wandering, solitary life.
I started to practice Falun Dafa in September of 2006 and things began to look up – good things began to happen one after the other.
I used to be very irritable and aggressive. My life was spent fighting, competing with others, and being jealous. It was as if I was living to prove a point to someone or to save face. If someone beat me at something, I'd make sure to beat them twice over; I was vengeful.
After I began to cultivate, I gradually understood the principle of karmic retribution. The animosity inside of me melted away as I learned to be considerate of others. As my mind became more open, my relationships with people became more harmonious.
Before, my body was very weak and I had a variety of health issues. But after cultivation, my body became purified. I have been cultivating for over ten years now, and have not needed to take a single pill or any medicine.
Soon after I started to practice Falun Dafa, I felt blessed. I got married and had a stable place to call home. My husband is a gentle, kind, honest, and reliable man.
When I was pregnant with our son, I often studied the Fa. In my mind, I hoped that the small life inside me was learning the Fa with me. And since his birth in 2008, my son has been blessed with Master Li Hongzhi's protection.
In elementary school, most of the students in the class had gone to prep school before. The average first-grade student knew one to two thousand words, while my son only knew two hundred. But without getting additional tutoring, he quickly caught up.
He made excellent grades in language arts, math, and English. When he first learned to write essays, his writing ability far exceeded that of his classmates. He was able to complete a two-thousand-word essay in one go, which amazed his elementary school teacher.
Now, he is in sixth grade. He has beautiful handwriting and is good at drawing and painting. I don't have to worry about his academic performance at school at all. He is kind to others and always willing to help; he was even elected the class representative by his classmates. After finishing his homework, he studies the Fa, practices the exercises by himself, and often helps me clarify the truth.
My husband is the breadwinner in my household. We both came to the city from the countryside, so it was a sharp rise in the cost of living for us.
In 2009, he earned a bonus, so we moved to a bigger house. After that, house prices suddenly started to skyrocket. We were very fortunate.
In 2016, we needed to replace the car that we had been using for 13 years. We identified a favorite model, but the price was a little over our budget. As if by coincidence, my husband's employer suddenly offered him additional compensation – just enough to cover the cost of the car.
Soon after I obtained the Fa, I lost contact with other practitioners, which left me cultivating on my own. During this cultivation process, Master arranged for different practitioners to meet me, and each time, my cultivation progressed one step forward.
During my pregnancy at home, I read Master Li's (the founder) Fa-teachings and came to understand the responsibility and mission of Dafa disciples during the Fa-rectification period. I knew that I should listen to Master and go out to awaken people. But at that time, I didn't know how. Through reading other practitioners' sharing articles, I learned how to compile simple truth-clarifying fliers. I printed them out at home and got them distributed.
Master then arranged for me to meet a practitioner who gave me a copy of the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party as well as software to get me around the Great Firewall. After reading it, I began to access blocked sites and learned how to print things out. I went out to purchase printing materials and distributed the Nine Commentaries at supermarkets and in people's mailboxes. When I met this practitioner the second time, he gave me a Shen Yun DVD, so I began to distribute Shen Yun DVDs as well.
Once, when I was sitting on a bench on my way home after distributing Shen Yun DVDs, a practitioner came over and started to clarify the truth to me. I was very happy and we had a good exchange.
From the next day on, I started to go out and clarify the truth face-to-face. Since then, during my work and daily life, I have been doing my best to tell people the truth. I've gotten several thousand people to withdraw from the CCP's organizations.
One day in 2014 on my way to work, a row of the CCP's propaganda bulletin boards caught my eye; they slandered Master and Dafa. It was located at a place with a lot of traffic, and what's more – across the street was a row of shops that faced the bulletin boards. These boards were in plain sight for the shoppers to see.
That was the first time I'd ever encountered this situation, and I was at a loss. But I thought that this tumor must be removed.
The company I worked for was pretty far from home, and I had to take care of my child at night. Plus, I was not able to drive. So I had to take care of these boards during the day.
I was terrified at the thought at first since the location was so conspicuous, but I reminded myself of Master and the fact that I was a Dafa disciple. I then made up my mind to break through this fear.
One day at noon, I spray painted over the boards and then calmly walked away in front of other people. But soon after, the boards were replaced with a new canvas that had the same content.
With a hint from Master, I realized that I needed to form one body with other practitioners and work together to eliminate the evil forces. I started to collect and compile a list of phone numbers of the relevant CCP units and sent it to Minghui.org, asking overseas practitioners to call them and clarify the truth.
One night, I went to the location again with my son and covered up the content with spray paint. Although I could hear the roaring of police cars among the hubbub of noises, my son and I were protected and returned home safely.
Not long after, I noticed some propaganda content smearing Dafa on a school's bulletin board. I removed it and then compiled a list of phone numbers of the relevant participants. I passed the list on to Minghui.org. With the collective efforts of Dafa disciples, the propaganda has completely disappeared.
Before cultivating Dafa, I was unwilling to socialize with others. Even now, when I speak with ordinary people I would still feel tense and uneasy and be afraid to speak. If it wasn't for telling the truth and necessary communications, I'd prefer to be alone.
Prior to practicing Falun Dafa, I was also very grumpy and got angry almost every day. By following the requirements of truthfulness, compassion, and forbearance, I gradually became better and better. But at home, it was still easy to relax and get upset when I was not paying attention to my mind. My family members often felt that I had a bad personality, and my husband would resent me.
Many relatives and friends believed in the CCP. Every time I tried to convince them otherwise, we would often get into arguments. I was anxious and felt helpless.
At those moments, the Fa would come to my mind: “As a practitioner, the first thing you should be able to do is to not fight back when you are beaten or sworn at—you must be tolerant.” (Lecture Nine in Zhuan Falun)
Once I was reminded of the Fa, I felt that I did poorly as a cultivator, even worse than an ordinary person. With my weaknesses I found that it was impossible to achieve sustained improvement.
I had been looking inward over the years, but I wasn't able to find the root cause. Sometimes I would make excuses for myself, since I was alone without other practitioners. After a period of time, gradually, I got used to such a state.
Recently, there was a problem with the electricity at home that made our TV signal unsteady. An electrician checked and did not find anything wrong. I felt that this was a manifestation of my cultivation state; if I changed, the problem would be resolved.
I calmed down and thought through my cultivation thus far. When I looked at myself through the eyes of a cultivator, the truth was suddenly clear to me, behind the layers of mist.
On the surface, I was very confident and did many things well, but the sense of self-deprecation had never been touched, and I had always been afraid of it being touched. Superficially, it looked like I firmly believed in Master Li and Dafa, but I was too obsessed with these illusions that looked and felt real.
I came to realize that I had been looking down myself all this time and letting my righteous thoughts be suppressed by interference. That's why I was not able to maintain a diligent cultivation state.
Just then, my husband came over and told me that the electricity was resolved; the TV signal was back to normal. I knew it was Master Li who was enlightening and encouraging me. I'd finally found the answer!
As I am writing now, I am very grateful. After going through so much, I believe that, at this final moment, as long as I truly believe in Master and Dafa, I can overcome my ingrained inferiority, truly cultivate with diligence, and accomplish a practitioner's mission.