(Minghui.org) I have been working recently with two other practitioners in a project to educate elementary school students about moral values. I’m responsible for planning and making the content, and the two other practitioners help with proof reading, and looking for things to improve.
Before our first meeting, I told myself that I must let go of the attachment to taking criticism.
Master told us,
“But normally when a problem arises, if it does not irritate you psychologically, it does not count or is useless and cannot make you improve.” (Lecture Four, Zhuan Falun)
When we first met, the two practitioners immediately brought up where things could be better and asked whether the content design would work. My heart felt out of order, but I kept reminding myself that the practitioners were trying to help the project and I need to be thankful and look within.
I asked myself why I was like that, and realized that it was because I didn’t get praised or encouraged by the other practitioners, and instead was strongly criticized. On the surface it also seemed as if the practitioners’ suggestions didn’t really help much, but magnified my attachments.
Master said,
“…so as to attain the righteous Enlightenment of selflessness and altruism.” (“Non-Omission in Buddha-Nature,” Essentials for Further Advancement)
Dafa practitioners are watched over and cared for by Master. Master arranged for me to be in this position, and thus there must be attachments that needed to be exposed. One such attachment I realized I had was a self-centered mentality, and I really wanted to get rid of it. Just then, I happened to read a sharing article entitled, Becoming Divine Is Difficult if Attachments Are Not Removed, which included the following:
“Although these practitioners do the three things every day, they are not cultivating their xinxing when validating Dafa. Rather, they focus on the number of people they saved, and look at that as being cultivation. Sometimes they even brag about how many people they have successfully convinced to quit the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) a given day, and feel complacent.”
Reading this made me realize that cultivation is eliminating all kinds of attachments when doing the three things. I felt much better when I was able to think through this.
My apartment building has a security entrance door and I recently noticed several times that residents didn’t lock it. I realized this was a hint for me that there were holes in my cultivation, but I couldn’t figure out where.
I then realized that I would always complain that residents had forgotten to lock the door. I was very happy I found this attachment and tried to eliminate it. The door was then locked.
Master told us,
“…with those people that you run into by chance, who you run into in daily life, and the people you run into at work, you should all clarify the truth to them. Even when in your daily life you pass by people so quickly that you don't have a chance to talk to them, you should still leave them with your compassion and kindness. Don't lose those who should be saved, especially those with predestined connections.” (“Teaching the Fa at the 2003 Atlanta Fa Conference,” Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. IV)
At my current level, my understanding is that I should clarify the facts in any environment I’m in. Every person I meet has a predestined relationship with me and I should try my best to tell them about the beauty of Dafa.
For many people, the predestined relationship with me may only result in a single encounter. When there is an opportunity, I try to give people a hand-made paper lotus flower, let them know “Falun Dafa is good; Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good,” and tell them about Falun Dafa.
During my internship, I often got to talk with patients and their families. I once had a conversation with a family member of a patient, and I felt very sympathetic about how she had to work very hard to take care of her family. But I didn’t remember to tell her about Dafa. I was determined that I would tell her if I saw her again. Every time I went to work I really hoped to see her, but she never came. I regretted this a lot and wished I had told her about it the first time.
I learned that I must always keep the truth-clarification issue in my mind. I asked Master to help me see her again because I really wanted to clarify the facts to her. On the last day of my internship, she again appeared at the ward. I told her about the beauty of Falun Dafa, and gave her a little lotus flower.
It was probably because I was so excited, but she seemed to feel a bit awkward when I was talking to her. However, she still nodded and accepted the lotus flower.
Now thinking back, I realize that I need to work on not having any attachments when clarifying the facts, even when I feel very excited inside.
While taking a train I met a gentleman who was in his 50s or 60s. He was holding a plastic bag with some simple clothes in it, and was staring out the window the whole time. I was a bit sleepy at the time so I took a nap. When I woke up, he had not moved. He looked very tired, but he was just motionless.
I thought about talking to him and giving him a lotus flower, but I had several bags that day, The lotus flower was in my backpack, and it was a little troublesome for me to get it. So I hesitated. But then I thought, maybe this would be the only encounter we would have, and I did not want to regret it later. So I got a lotus flower. We started talking, and I found out that he was a good person.
He told me that his wife passed away three months ago, and he couldn’t get rid of the sadness, so he was going to visit his daughter. I gave him the lotus flower, told him that I was a Falun Dafa practitioner, and that I hand-made it.
Even though he was wearing a mask, I could tell that it truly made him happy. He said he would hang the lotus flower at home and keep it well. I was very touched, and I was glad that a sentient being didn’t miss the opportunity to know about Dafa due to my laziness. We really need to use every opportunity to leave our compassion with sentient beings.
I sometimes looked at other young practitioners and felt that their cultivation was much more relaxed than mine. Then I would have bad thoughts such as, “Why do I need to try so hard? I want to be like them.”
I knew this mindset was not good, but I could not let go. I now understand that it is due to lack of Fa study.
I have realized that I’m not cultivating for other practitioners, but for myself and the sentient beings I need to save.
Master told us,
“There are no role models in cultivation. You can't watch how others cultivate, and you can't just fix your eyes on others--‘If you do well, I'll do well. If you don't do well, then I'll forget about it, too’--having no independent thoughts of your own at all. Tell me, when it comes to those students, how am I supposed to guide your cultivation? Are you the one cultivating? You're always foggy headed, and your words aren't genuine. In cultivation you can't watch others, you can only cultivate solidly on your own. How do you cultivate? Just study the Fa a lot, and don't watch others.” (“Teaching the Fa at the 2003 Atlanta Fa Conference,” Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. IV)
Master’s Fa really touched my heart and I felt it was precisely the issue I had. It told me that I should not watch others.
Whenever I was diligent, I would feel time is running out and I must hurry. On the other hand, when I relaxed, my will for saving sentient beings would weaken. When I noticed it, I tried to study the Fa more, and read or listen to sharing articles to strengthen my righteous thoughts.
There are so many things in ordinary society that can lure us away, and we could be dragged off our cultivation paths if we don’t pay close attention. I hope that in the future I will always be able to stay on my cultivation path and avoid detours.