(Minghui.org) Greetings honorable Master! Greetings fellow practitioners!
Even though I read Zhuan Falun and watched Shen Yun's performances for five or six years, I only truly began cultivation in 2021.
When I was still in high school in 2008, I took the U.S. college entrance exam and was accepted at five universities. But shortly after the 2008 Beijing Olympics the worldwide economic crisis hit. My father, who was one of China’s first international traders, couldn’t escape. I saw his hair turn grey overnight, and I lost the source of my financial support to study overseas.
In early 2009 to save on costs, I only applied to art schools in China. Out of tens of thousands of students, I came out 5th in the entire country. I enrolled in the director program at a Theatre Academy, where I met my girlfriend, who is a Falun Dafa practitioner.
I started working before graduating college, and every film that I worked on was a major production worth tens or hundreds of millions of dollars. I had my own chauffeur, assistants, directing team, and hundreds of people at my command. I was only in my mid-twenties but I was already smoking and drinking heavily. I used profanity like it was punctuation in whatever I said. My ego was swollen by endless fame and wealth. I was hypocritical—on the surface, I was humble in the face of those who I could use to make money. On the inside, I was knee-deep in the cutthroat competition with ordinary people.
It was during this time that I witnessed the process of the CCP (Chinese Communist Party) persecuting my girlfriend’s mother for practicing Falun Dafa. I didn’t try to discourage my girlfriend when I learned that she planned to give up her career in China and head to Canada to make truth clarifying films. But this was out of a selfish notion, thinking that I’d keep making money in China, and she could go establish Canadian residency. If we end up together, this would just be part of my overseas investment plan.
Due to the nature of my profession, in my study and work environment, I’ve met many women who were very attractive. Most of them kept contacting me, trying to be included in my projects. But they were worlds apart in moral standards compared to my girlfriend. I grew accustomed to being sought after by these people. After seeing her off, I dove headlong into worldly pursuits. Looking back now I can clearly see the ultimate end of my life: I was headed all the way down into the pit of destruction. Filthy as I was, Master Li (Falun Dafa’s founder) scooped me up from the mundane world.
I flew to Toronto to visit my girlfriend in early 2018, who was working at New Century Films. At that time, many practitioners told me miraculous stories after Falun Dafa was introduced, but as an ordinary person, I was skeptical and considered them merely stories. The practitioners suggested I watch the videos of Master’s Lectures in Guangzhou. Having watched the First Lecture, I found it quite acceptable and continued on to the Second Lecture. I soon fell fast asleep, and only woke up near the end of the lecture. Fearing that others might ask me about the content of the lecture, I tried to save face by rewinding the video to the point where I fell asleep. Amazingly, I clearly remembered every sentence Master said. Full of human attachments, like ego, I didn’t find this curious. I thought it was because I remembered it from having previously read Zhuan Falun.
I decided to step outside for a cigarette. It was wintertime, and the temperature was low, and I had to make several attempts before getting one lit. A moldy, bitter taste immediately spread from the tip of my tongue into my mouth. I thought, “Gosh, this cigarette is stale, this foreign stuff isn’t good quality.” I put out the cigarette and headed back inside to watch the last bit of the Second Lecture, and it was then that Master talked about this part in Zhuan Falun:
“ A few of you might fall asleep during the class, only to wake up after I finish my talk. That happens because there was something wrong with your head, and it needed to be put right. You needed to be anesthetized so that you wouldn’t feel anything. Yet in some cases the faculty of hearing isn’t affected, and you won’t have missed a word even if you were sound asleep. ” (The Second Talk, Zhuan Falun)
I realized Master had started adjusting my body. In the next few days, I tried to smoke several times, but the taste was just not right. I had poor enlightenment quality, and in no time after returning to China, I was back to smoking one pack a day.
When I was a child I found alcohol distasteful. But soon after I started high school, I got drunk every other day. It got worse after I started studying theatrical arts, as I was surrounded by heavy drinkers. Alcohol became a daily habit, and later a necessary part of my art creation: If I was sober, I could hardly produce a single page of script, but when I was drunk and almost to the point of losing consciousness, I could easily write tens of thousands of words overnight. So naturally, alcohol—and certainly strong liquors—were essential for me. A bottle of strong liquor would accompany me at all times.
During my three visits to Toronto to see my girlfriend, I always had ample time to talk with practitioners at New Century Films. The miracles of Dafa and the practitioners’ high moral standards always impressed me. Despite being an ordinary person, and not knowing why people need to quit the Party, I clarified the truth about the persecution to almost everyone around me back in China, simply out of deep respect for Master. I’m grateful to Master because the dozens of people I’ve clarified the truth to, all have a correct understanding of Dafa, and later on, almost all of them quit the Party—among them were some of the most prestigious figures in China’s film and entertainment circles.
My frequent overseas visits and my girlfriend taking the lead role in several films produced by New Century Films frightened the CCP, and so I eventually caught the attention of the National Security Bureau. On January 18, 2019, the day after I returned to Shanghai from Toronto, the Shanghai police launched a city-wide operation to arrest me. They found my film crew, and even tried to locate me with the assistance of a renowned director. When I called my girlfriend she told me to get out of China fast.
My journeys to Canada clearly showed me the brutal nature of the CCP and its persecution of Falun Dafa, even if I didn’t have a deep understanding of the teachings. Strangely, I was very clear-headed then: I had this thought that by leaving China, I could become a righteous man, but I would continue to lead a despicable life if I stayed. I booked my tickets, turned off my phone, wrote on my hand the two flight numbers, and started my 4-hour escape.
I experienced miracles and Master’s arrangement as every person who helped me get to the airport that day were the people I had clarified the truth to. Thank you Master for your protection! When I got on the plane, tears ran down my cheeks as I thought: “Master, if you help me get out of China I will definitely quit smoking and drinking!” Looking back now, that thought was disrespectful to Master. It was as though I was bargaining with Master. I was so ignorant! But from that day on, I got rid of those habits. Thank you Master!
Just like that, I was back in Toronto—only 48 hours after I returned to China. I didn’t even say goodbye to my family. Shaken and stressed out, I arrived safely in Canada. But that was just my first step on my path of cultivation.
Back in China I made a handsome salary and owned real estate. In pursuit of greater wealth, most of my money was handled by a finance manager, so I carried little money. My girlfriend was a volunteer at New Century Films and needed my support. After paying for my plane ticket, pre-paid by practitioners in the crew, I barely had two pennies to rub together. It was impossible to get cash out of China, as I would have to go to the bank in person with an ID to do so. I lost my assets, career, family, and friends in one night. To this day, more than three years later, I haven’t had contact with my family. All the fame, profit, and relationships I enjoyed were reduced to zero overnight.
At that time, I felt like I had lost the meaning of life. Deep down, I blamed my girlfriend for the loss of my career and all my grand dreams. I wasn’t too happy to see fellow practitioners either. As my resentment grew I blamed everyone on the project. What I believed to be great deeds seemed less so as I grew pessimistic in the face of tribulations.
But Master never gave up on me and was compassionate even as I struggled with those negative thoughts. For two nights when I dreamed small red rings were connected to every joint in my body, with a string pulled on the rings. At one point, the rings would suddenly burst, and I would be pulled upward to a high plane. There I could see my own body from every angle, and the earth was small and far below. Then I sped downwards to earth. During those nights, I also saw my parents, friends, and anyone I wanted to see; I could see their thoughts and how they went about their days. I wanted to talk to them, but they couldn’t hear me. The dream always ended with me seeing the “me” that left my body, falling slowly back down and merging with my body sleeping in bed. At that moment I always woke up. Because I grew attached to that amazing feeling, it never happened again. But I was grateful to Master. I saw those I yearned to see, and I felt at peace.
When I felt that I was at my lowest point, practitioners suggested I marry my girlfriend. I was reluctant, believing that I had no way to provide for her. All those struggles boiled down to me being broke—I had to borrow to pay for my lawyer to apply for refugee status. How could I afford a wedding?
But practitioners at New Century Films held a simple yet memorable wedding for us. They helped me look for a restaurant and prepared the wedding banquet. The expenses were shared by every practitioner on the crew. Compared to the extravagant weddings held by people nowadays, ours was simple, yet warm and solemn. Best of all, the atmosphere was grateful to Master and our oath as Dafa disciples. It was the most extraordinary wedding I could have hoped for. Thank you, Master!
I was judgmental of the practitioners around me for a long time. But as time went by, I realized that not only did they not bear me any grudges, but they were also even more caring and understanding of my attachments. We share our thoughts and experiences twice a week, and these are heartwarming experiences. During these discussions practitioners always search within unconditionally. Even as selfish as I am, I am touched and admire their openness. I want to become just like them.
Miraculously, those practitioners, who I found lacking in artistic appreciation, suddenly seemed enlightened and exceeded my expectations. More miracles emerged in the project—in a matter of three years, the crew produced close to 50 films and won hundreds of international film festival awards for best directing, best short film, best original song, best costumes, best actress, best actor, best cinematography, and best editing. This was nothing short of miraculous!
I worked behind the scenes for some time on the project using the stage name “Freeman.” I was reluctant to show my face, and even more so to be an actor. This was partially out of concern for my family back in China, and partially out of the twisted notions of hierarchy and profits I acquired as an ordinary person. I’ve known many actors and actresses and I have met hundreds more on a daily basis. But apart from those prestigious or capable individuals, most actors were really just nobodies, who had big dreams but just lived from day to day. They had no rights or choices in life, still less any power. While they appear glamorous, the truth is, whether they stay or leave, it’s all up to us directors and the investors. I could never imagine myself living in such a passive state.
One evening, as we were close to the end of a weekly sharing, I raised my hand and said, “I want to be the male lead.” I had no idea why I blurted out those words. The other practitioners and I looked at each other and started laughing.
Yet three days later, the silent film “A Simple Pamphlet” went on the floor, and I really became the male lead. Perhaps Master saw that, in the past, I made truth-clarification films to fight against the CCP that persecuted me, out of anger and competitiveness but now I had a genuine wish for every sentient being to learn the truth about Dafa, including those still at work within that system. Master gave me a chance to make that wish come true.
Finally, I’d like to point out that I am 30 years old this year, just as the world celebrates the 30th anniversary of the spread of Falun Dafa. I don’t know what I had to go through in my countless lifetimes before I landed here. I have no idea how much Master has endured, or what he adjusted, and arranged for me. I want to say to Master: It’s clear that I still have myriads of attachments and selfish notions, but I want to be a Dafa disciple and a true cultivator.
This is my cultivation sharing, please kindly point out any shortcomings.
Thank you, Master! Thank you fellow practitioners!
(Presented at the 2022 Canada Falun Dafa Cultivation Experience Sharing Conference)