(Minghui.org) I started practicing Falun Dafa in 1998 and I am in my 70s. Since the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) began persecuting Falun Dafa in July 1999, I have been arrested one time after another and incarcerated for up to 14 years in brainwashing centers, detention centers, labor camps, and prisons.
After I was released from prison at the end of last year, I reflected on my cultivation and the persecution I’ve endured. By memorizing the Fa and seriously looking inward, I adjusted my cultivation state and steadily do the three things well. Now, I will report my cultivation experience over the past year to Master and share it with fellow practitioners.
After surviving three years of relentless torture in the prison, I returned home, only to be told about the death of my husband, who was also a practitioner. We had been married for decades, and he had always been taking care of me and the household affairs. I couldn’t even cook. Although my son’s family is not far away, I can’t visit them often. Now, I have to live independently.
I have to learn doing everything myself, from grocery shopping and cooking to fixing things around the house. Feeling lonely and longing for my husband, I felt sad and helpless.
Due to my repeated persecution, my family, who initially supported Dafa, changed their attitude. My son and daughter-in-law didn’t allow me to bring up the topic of Falun Gong or go out to talk to people about it. When I went to their home for dinner and tried to clarify the facts to their guests, they deliberately changed the subject to stop me. My sister and her family also told me not to go out and just practice at home.
At the same time, I also faced severe financial difficulties. While I was in prison, my sister, who was addicted to mahjong gambling, not only lost all her own money but also withdrew all my savings and lost everything. I gave her my bank card to hire a lawyer for me, but she spent it on gambling.
A few days after I returned home, the Social Security Bureau sent me a notice, demanding that I return the 50,000 yuan in pension payments that I received during my prison term and that my future pension payments would be reduced to 750 yuan per month.
What hurt me the most was the misunderstanding and rumors spread by fellow practitioners. In the past, whenever I was released from prison or labor camps, fellow practitioners would come to visit me and ask how I was doing. This time, even those who were previously close to me didn’t come to visit me, and some even avoided me. For the few practitioners who came to see me, they talked to me in a stern tone and used sharp words.
Facing these unexpected challenges, I felt lost and miserable.
I looked at Master’s photo in Zhuan Falun. Master’s smile lifted my spirits. I asked myself, “Am I a Dafa disciple? What is the mission of a Dafa disciple?”
I understood that this was another tribulation set up by the old forces. I could not get stuck in it. Master has repeatedly emphasized the importance of Fa study, so I decided to study the Fa well first. I believe that Dafa can change everything.
I had memorized Zhuan Falun in 2008. With a good foundation, I started to memorize the Fa again. Although I am already in my 70s, it didn’t take long for me to memorize one lecture in two and a half hours and finish memorizing the entirebook once a week.
When studying the Fa, no matter how long it was, I always sat in double lotus position. Because I had not sat like this for many years in prison, I felt severe pain shortly after crossing my legs. But no matter how painful it was, I wouldn’t put my legs down. Because of the pain, my clothes got soaked even in the winter, but I persisted. After a while, I could sit in the double lotus position for hours.
In addition to studying Zhuan Falun every day, I also read other Dafa books. After memorizing Zhuan Falun for a while, I began to hand copy it. It took me three months to copy the whole book. In addition to studying the Fa, I also read fellow practitioners’ sharing articles on Minghui. Their touching stories inspired me to catch up and not slack off.
After I started cultivation, most of the time was spent in prison, and there was very little time for me to calm down and study the Fa. I had lost so much time over the years. I must cherish the time that Master has extended for us and catch up in my cultivation.
I slept only three hours daily and got up at 3 a.m. to do the exercises. I never missed a day. To save time, I prepared two days’ worth of food at one time and heated it up in the microwave. Sometimes, I would rather skip a meal and sleep less to make up for the time I spent studying the Fa.
Master taught us:
“For a cultivator, looking within is a magical tool.” (“Fa Teaching Given at the 2009 Washington, D.C. International Fa Conference,” Collected Teachings Given Around the World Volume IX)
A great deal of studying and memorizing the Fa has enabled me to rationally review my cultivation. I looked within to find my attachments and shortcomings. What was the reason for my repeated persecution, and why did fellow practitioners look at me that way? I thought about the problem that a fellow practitioner pointed out to me, including attachments to reputation, showing off, elation, and jealousy.
Looking back on my cultivation experience, I did have the desire to validate myself when clarifying the truth and distributing materials. I was complacent every time after distributing materials. I would tell fellow practitioners how much material I had distributed that day, and I was happy when they praised me. Isn’t this showing off, elation, and seeking fame? When I heard that some practitioner was very good at distributing materials and clarifying the truth, I would feel uncomfortable. Isn’t this jealousy?
I also found my desire to doing things and strong Party culture in the ways I did things. After digging deeper, I found a lot of human attachments; all these are reasons for the old forces to persecute me.
The rumors and negative views of fellow practitioners about me were both a test for me and an attempt by the old forces to create a gap between us. I must pass this test well. I didn’t try to explain or clarify things for myself. If some practitioners asked me about it, I would explain it in a few words. If they didn’t believe me, I wouldn’t argue with them or resent them. Half a year later, they invited me to a group Fa study, and now I’m even closer with them than before.
As I studied the Fa in-depth, my kindness increased. I was not swayed by the attitudes of my relatives towards me. No matter what they did to me, I treated them kindly. I remembered their birthdays and sent them gifts every year, something I had neglected to do before.
I told my son and daughter-in-law, “Your father’s untimely death was caused by the persecution, not by Dafa. We are all good people, and you have seen for yourselves. If I had not been persecuted so many times, your father would not have become ill from worrying about me. And if I wasn’t jailed, I could stay home to take care of him. You should thank Master Li for protecting me from being tortured to death in the prison, otherwise you would not only have lost your father, but also your mother.”
I also told them, “Falun Dafa has always been legal in China. It is the CCP that violates the law by persecuting good people. We are only telling people the facts.”
They saw how skinny and frail I was when I was released from the prison. After studying the Fa and doing the exercises for some time, my health improved significantly. I was in good spirits and full of energy. I look younger than my age. In particular, my successfully reclaiming my pension showed them the lawfulness of practicing Dafa and the perseverance of Dafa practitioners.
Slowly, they changed their attitude and supported me in my cultivation. They also reminded me to clarify the truth wisely and to be careful. Once, a prison guard called my son and asked him how I was doing. My son replied, “She is doing well as long as you don’t bother her.” The guard asked for my phone number, but my son refused to give it to him.
I also went to the community offices to clarify the truth, successfully persuading the staffers to quit the CCP.
In this way, by earnestly studying the Fa, reciting the Fa, looking inward, and cultivating diligently, I changed my family environment, eliminated the gap between me and fellow practitioners, and helped some government workers understand the facts.
I did not passively endure the financial persecution, but used the process of seeking reinstatement of my pension as an opportunity for truth-clarification.
With the help of fellow practitioners, I sent letters to the district Social Security Center and Human Resources and Social Security Bureau. A few days later, the Social Security Center sent a written reply, rejecting my request.
While I knew that I should try to talk to the officials in person, I was worried about being reported and arrested again, since I had just been released from prison. Then a voice echoed in my mind: “What are you afraid of? You have Master!”
I looked at Master’s picture and asked Master to help me in my heart.
I got up at 3 a.m., did the exercises, and then sent forth righteous thoughts. I memorized one lecture of Zhuan Falun, and out I went.
At first, the director of the Social Security Center was very firm that I would only get 750 yuan a month as a basic living allowance. He also said to me: “You are so old. Why don’t you stay home and enjoy your retirement, but instead you are doing this? If the government doesn’t allow it, don’t do it.”
I wasn’t affected by him. I looked at him and said with a smile, “Young man, I have to tell you the facts today. From the legal point of view, we are innocent and did not violate any law. Falun Gong is not one of the 14 cults identified by the Ministry of Public Security. The Chinese Press and Publication Administration has lifted the ban on Falun Gong books. And no law criminalizes Falun Gong in China. My three-year sentence is unjust, and it is also illegal and unconstitutional to withhold my pension.”
The director first said it was impossible [that the persecution didn’t have a legal basis] and then said they didn’t care about that.
I continued, “You have the right to know the facts. The policy issued by the Ministry of Human Resources and Social Security that you referred to when withholding my pension contradicts Chinese labor law. The CCP is just using you as a tool to reinforce its persecution policy.”
I also told them about the torture I suffered in prison. They were shocked and could not believe me.
“Do you think I would lie to you?” I asked them.
“No, we don’t think so. You are kind and reasonable. We can’t believe you are in your 70s, with such a sharp mind.”
They were impressed with how articulate and knowledgeable I was about the law and assumed that I had a college education. They were in disbelief when I told them I only went to elementary school.
I explained, “I used to have very good grades in elementary school, but because my father was labeled as a right-wing activist, I was not allowed to go to junior high school. Falun Dafa gives me wisdom.”
The director was touched by my story and agreed to give me 2,000 yuan a month.
I further clarified the facts to them. They all agreed to quit the CCP.
After clarifying the truth at the Social Security Center, I continued to clarify the truth to other government agencies, including the Human Resources and Social Security Bureau, the Women’s Federation, and other departments, by mailing letters to them and visiting them in person. The truth-clarification went very well and they eventually agreed to give me 3,000 yuan a month, only withholding a little as a gesture of following the [persecution] policy.
After the pension issue was resolved, I wrote to my former workplace, asking for the reimbursement of my living allowance and holiday condolence money during my prison term, totaling more than 10,000 yuan. After several rounds of truth-clarification between my workplace and the Political and Legal Affairs Committee (an extralegal agency tasked to oversee the persecution), my workplace agreed to reissue several thousand yuan by the end of this year.
In this way, my financial difficulties were relatively well resolved, which not only benefited me in doing the three things, but also changed the attitude of my family and friends towards Dafa. They initially thought this was mission impossible, but I did it by clarifying the truth.
One week after I was released from prison, I began to go out daily to clarify the facts, despite the initial objection from my son. Now I can persuade over 20-30 people to quit the CCP every day. But I always hope to do it with fellow practitioners and I believe the effect would be much better that way.
I met a fellow practitioner named Yu, a retired teacher in her 60s, who had just taken up Falun Dafa a few years ago. She was also looking for a practitioner to clarify the truth with together. So we teamed up and thanked Master for his arrangement.
The first time we went out, we decided to go to a Farm Fun House. That morning, it rained heavily. I was hoping the rain could stop soon, so that we could go out to save people. A few minutes later, the rain indeed stopped. It was my first time working with Yu, and we were very much in sync. We persuaded 21 people to quit the CCP that day.
Shortly after, Yu and another practitioner, Jie, in her 50s, invited me to clarify the truth at a summer resort in a neighboring province this year. It’s a popular tourist site with as many as 300,000 visitors from around the country. In fact, my last prison sentence resulted from being arrested at that summer resort, after being reported for clarifying the facts there a few years ago. I did not let the persecution experience haunt me and readily agreed.
The three of us stayed there for more than 20 days. We got up at 3 a.m. and did the exercises. After sending forth righteous thoughts and finishing breakfast, we left at around 7:30 a.m. We walked around and clarified the truth to anyone we encountered. When we returned, we studied the Fa until 11:30 p.m., and we went to bed after sending forth righteous thoughts at midnight.
During this period, we persuaded more than 300 people to quit the CCP. Although they are both new practitioners who started to cultivate in 2019, they are diligent and have greatly helped me. I was really moved by Yu’s heart to save people. She came across a retired teacher, and spent over an hour to eventually persuade him to quit the CCP. I truly admire her persistence.
Jie initially sent forth righteous thoughts while Yu and I were talking. After a few days, she broke through her fear and was able to talk to people herself. One morning, she persuaded five people to quit the CCP. One person was so touched and grateful that he wanted to offer her 500 yuan. She kindly turned it down.
Not long ago, a fellow practitioner who was just released from prison asked me: “Why were you able to adjust your cultivation state and catch up with the Fa-rectification process in such a short period?”
I told her that it’s the strong sense of duty and urgency to save people that push me to seize the time to do well.
As I continued to study the Fa with a calm mind and improve my xinxing, some obstacles and difficulties were easily resolved. I could do the three things more smoothly, and my results in saving people got better.
Falun Dafa is truly amazing and truly omnipotent. In the future, I must cultivate steadfastly and do the three things well to live up to Master’s compassionate salvation.