(Minghui.org) The practitioners who obtained the Fa before the persecution began and who were in their 40s or 50s then, are now in their 70s or 80s. Looking back at almost 30 years of cultivation, each practitioner could write a book about their cultivation journey.
There’s an old saying in China: “Time reveals a person’s true character.” After the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) started to persecute Falun Dafa, a large number of practitioners were afraid to continue practicing, and dropped out. Many of those who persisted until now have undergone life-and-death tests—whether it was petitioning the provincial capital city, going to Beijing to petition, or facing repeated illegal harassment, arrests, brainwashing, detention, and persecution by the CCP. Those who completely trusted Master and the Fa, and remained unwavering in their faith, are truly remarkable. Most of us have stumbled and struggled, yet walked through under the compassionate guidance of Master, who constantly encouraged and awakened us.
A few days ago, I heard some practitioners discussing an issue⸺that a number of practitioners have stopped practicing. Although I’m not familiar with the situation in other regions, I’ve noticed that things don’t look optimistic around me, either. Although not everyone can climb to the top of a high mountain, it makes me feel a bit sad.
Over the years, with Master’s guidance, I worked hard to create opportunities for other practitioners to access Minghui.org online. This allowed them to enlighten and cultivate themselves by reading articles from other practitioners worldwide. These practitioners were diligent in their cultivation and in doing the three things to save people. Such practitioners also submitted their own experience-sharing articles to Minghui.org each year. During that time, I was particularly busy helping to edit their articles, typing them into electronic files, and submitting them to Minghui.org. It was a busy but fulfilling time.
Due to interference and destruction by the evil forces, the overall environment for group Fa-study in our area has been lost, and there are very few materials sites left. And some practitioners passed away after being persecuted repeatedly. Because the evil’s Internet censorship has intensified since last year, other practitioners who were already fearful, gradually stopped trying to break through the Internet blockade and no longer visit Minghui.org, let alone write experience-sharing articles! Seeing this, I suddenly realized that I was also becoming lax. I was treating studying the Fa, practicing the exercises, and doing the three things as mere tasks to complete.
In June of this year, Master published two new jingwen in succession. On the surface, they seemed unrelated to Dafa disciples in China. But were those jingwen only meant for Dafa disciples abroad? Master said in “The Ordeals Our Spiritual Discipline Faces:”
“The truth is, we shouldn’t expect to not face ordeals as a spiritual discipline just because we are in a certain location; it’s just that they assume different forms. And during these ordeals, lives are being chosen to either remain or be sifted out in the end, and just as much is at stake for our Dafa practitioners.”
It is very clear that Dafa disciples in China are also being chosen for whether we “...either remain or be sifted out in the end...” Only those who are gold can remain. Master is truly worried about the muddled state we disciples are in right now. As a veteran Dafa disciple, I must awaken and be diligent.
I looked inside myself: Why are various negative conditions appearing among the practitioners around me? How is this related to my cultivation, and how should I cultivate going forward?
Master specifically wrote a section in Zhuan Falun about the mentality of showing off. This shows how important it is to eliminate this mindset and how widespread it is.
Before July 20, 1999, a veteran practitioner once reminded me: “...whose exercise movements look better also like to show off.” (Lecture Six, Zhuan Falun) That was during the third exercise when a practitioner couldn’t coordinate her two hands: one hand was going up, while the other hand was just starting to go down. I kept demonstrating the movement to her, showing her how to move one hand up and the other hand down at the same time. I also told her: “If you don’t do it right at the beginning, you might throw off the energy mechanism.” When we studied the Fa together as a group and read that line in Zhuan Falun, some practitioners glanced at me, hinting at this. Back then, I didn’t look within and thought, “I’m doing this for her own good!” and so on.
Over the years, as I helped other practitioners, my mentality of showing off kept growing with their frequent admiration, praise, and even flattery. At first, I felt proud of myself. Everywhere I went, I felt like I was there to help others. Other practitioners said I was smart, capable, and cultivated well. They even said that for someone my age, my eyesight was still great. I enjoyed hearing this. I felt proud of myself for learning all the technology over the years, transitioning from a computer novice to someone who could help other practitioners access Minghui.org. I felt like I deserved their admiration. I even started bragging about how well I had learned those skills back then…, and now I have the ability to help everyone thanks to my self-study skills.
The wisdom and abilities were granted by Master for me to help other practitioners, but I unknowingly started to attribute them to myself. How could I not fall in my cultivation? Moreover, the abilities I have now, though earned through hard work and study, are the result of the joint efforts of technical practitioners and other practitioners in my area. Yet, I became arrogant and took credit for them, putting Dafa in a secondary position.
Recently, I read an article on Minghui.org titled “Some Thoughts on the Attachment to Oneself,” which talked about the danger of being arrogant. The author wrote, “I wondered why I was so busy before I was arrested. Why couldn’t I stop? Was ‘doing things’ my only attachment? I also wanted to show off: ‘See how capable I am, I can do so many things so fast, I can do practically everything except fix the machine.’ When others praised me, I felt good about it. All the attachments reinforced each other, making my attachment to self grow bigger and bigger.”
“Driven by my attachment to myself, I became increasingly busy and unable to extricate myself, and I had less and less time for Fa study. When I sent forth righteous thoughts, my mind was filled with things I felt I needed to do, and I couldn’t calm down. I always failed to look inward and correct myself.”
What the practitioner described in the article fits my negative state as well.
Fine! You’re smart and capable, so you end up doing everything! Because of this, some practitioners who used to help others started relying on me, even complaining that no one was teaching them. Some issues needed my personal intervention to coordinate and resolve. I ran around addressing them without complaint, wearing myself out both mentally and physically. I couldn’t find enough time to study the Fa and do the exercises, let alone look within or cultivate myself.
As a result, some practitioners who had the ability to access Minghui.org were still hindered by the evil’s Internet blockade and couldn’t break through. Their computers could never connect to the Internet for system updates, and they even put them up on the shelf. They had computers, but they confidently and justifiably continued to ask me to provide them with materials. For example, when I told them that Master had published a new jingwen, they immediately extended their hands, saying, “Give it to me!” They expected me to supply them with printed copies of the new jingwen, while they could do it themselves.
I kept providing them with Master’s new jingwen and other materials. And I spent a lot of time preparing audio files on USB drives for them. After looking within and comparing myself to the principles of the Fa, I realized that my constant indulgence and doing things for them was preventing them from walking their own paths in cultivation.
Everyone has a tendency to seek comfort, to be a bit lazy, and to take the easy way out. But as cultivators, if we only rely on others, how can we elevate and improve? Master wants all of us to cultivate ourselves to become selfless beings who think of others first. If everyone relies on others to serve them, then who will serve others? This attachment is something every practitioner must eliminate, and it’s also why Minghui.org has encouraged “Flowers Blossoming Everywhere” and practitioners to have material production sites.
I cannot let my strong desire to show off block other practitioners from walking their own cultivation paths. After realizing the serious consequences brought by my desire to show off, I began to address these problems. While providing practitioners with service, I repeatedly engaged them in discussions about this and we shared based on the Fa principles. After they realized their problems, I helped them access Minghui.org and produce their own materials.
I was delighted to see that after our sharing, some practitioners have improved, and they felt genuinely happy and grateful to Master!
I must follow Master’s teachings and always remind myself, in every situation, that I am still a low-level cultivator with many attachments, and I must constantly reject and eliminate my desire to show off.
I did things slowly, and at times even procrastinated. When I helped practitioners with technology-related things, it took a lot of time and effort because I was not skilled in technology and learned as I went. I often left home early in the morning and did not return until nine or ten at night. At first, to avoid troubling other practitioners, I brought my own lunch, and sometimes lunch for the practitioner and their family.
I initially brought food like buns and frozen dumplings. As my financial situation improved, I started bringing more elaborate items, such as various prepared dishes, semi-finished meals, fruit, and so on. The original intention was to save cooking time so we could do more Dafa work together. But gradually, the situation began to change. Some practitioners lived with family who were not practitioners, and they thought I was bringing them gifts rather than just food for our meals; they preferred to save the food I brought for themselves and cook a different meal for us. This took more time and ended up wasting time, instead of saving it, and my presence added more work for them. In cases where we ate my food together, the practitioners and their non-practitioner family members began to comment on which dish was tastier or which wasn’t as good.
When I didn’t have time to prepare food the day before, or the shops I usually bought food from weren’t open early in the morning, I would arrive empty-handed. This led to conversations about what foods were good to eat and why I didn’t bring any... It seemed that I had “nurtured” cravings in other practitioners! I realized that my approach to the food was wrong, and my path in cultivation was starting to deviate.
Master said, “...it’s cultivation—whatever happened to being “free of gaps” (wu-lou)? There are no little things.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2015 West Coast Fa Conference”)
Thus, even something like meals is no little thing. The problem was my sentiment for other practitioners that I hadn’t let go of. I often felt that some practitioners had difficult living conditions, some had been repeatedly persecuted and suffered greatly in prison, and everyone was busy validating the Fa, leaving no time to cook for themselves. So, I felt it was acceptable to enjoy some good food together when we met.
A more serious example was when I visited a practitioner who lived alone. I brought all kinds of food—chicken, duck, fish, and meat—and not only brought ready-made food but even cooked more food there, providing a whole table of dishes. Anyone would have thought it was for a group of people. Seeing ourselves enjoy the meal, and hearing continuous compliments and thanks, my vanity was greatly satisfied. I don’t think we acted like cultivators. Moreover, everything Dafa disciples do in validating the Fa is to leave something for the future. How could this behavior serve as a reference for the future? The attachment to sentiment for other practitioners is what I must eliminate; it cannot be left as a reference for the future.
I realized I was also attached to food. Master gave me a hint about this. For example, I loved eating water caltrops and chestnuts. However, they were difficult to digest, so I only ate a little at a time. But a few years into cultivation, and especially in recent years, if I ate even just a little, my stomach and abdomen swelled, became painful, and felt unbearably heavy. Recently, it got to the point where I constantly needed to use the restroom. After that, I stopped eating those foods. Now, I eat whatever is at home, including leftovers that my family doesn’t want or food that has been sitting for a while. And when I go to help other practitioners, I just bring food that is light and simple.
When I recall how we’ve weathered the evil persecution and made it up to today, it’s all because everyone was helping each other, truly letting go of everything, as Master said, “...to mutually save and help one another...” (“Stay Far Away From Peril” Team Blue Translation) During the years I was imprisoned, none of the practitioners in my residential area visited me even once. Yet, the practitioners from other areas, despite the rampant persecution at the time, risked their safety to visit me in prison. Some even brought me Master’s new teachings. Without Master’s Dafa, I couldn’t have made it through! I felt that not being able to read Master’s teachings was the most painful thing... That’s why I absolutely will not stop learning technical skills!
Because I recently slacked off in my cultivation and have been undergoing long-term sickness karma elimination. I need to put in my best effort. I do not acknowledge the false illusion of physical and mental exhaustion caused by years of repeated illness-karma elimination. I will continue to help the practitioners who once risked their lives to help me, as well as other practitioners, ensuring they can access Minghui.org as usual.
We “veteran practitioners” all know that Master already pushed us into place before the persecution started. Master cherishes us. The beings in heaven who couldn’t come down to obtain the Fa envy us. The beings in our heavenly kingdom are eagerly waiting for their king to cultivate to consummation and return. We absolutely must not stop progressing at the final stage of assisting Master in the Fa-rectification period.
Master said, “You’ve already made it through tens of thousands of trials and tribulations—don’t get tripped up at the last moment.” (“Wake Up”, Team Blue Translation)
Let’s all persevere in eliminating all attachments that block our return to heaven, fulfill the grand vows we made in our previous lives, and let Master be rest assured!