(Minghui.org) Since January, my cultivation status has been at a low point. I couldn’t concentrate when I read the Fa (teachings) or when I sent forth righteous thoughts. I was deeply moved when I see fellow practitioners going out every day with a pure, kind, and compassionate demeanor to clarify the truth about the persecution and help Master save people.
Reflecting on myself, I failed to cultivate compassion and kind thoughts. I did very poorly with face-to-face truth clarification and I hesitated to talk to anyone when I went out. If I met someone, I either don’t know how to begin or I wasn’t able to explain the truth clearly which made me sad. This became an attachment of self-abasement and interfered with my ability to help people understand the facts about the Chinese Communist Party’s (CCP) persecution of Falun Dafa.
My bag was searched by police at a train station in January this year. Since then I have been very distracted and couldn’t concentrate when I read the Fa. I kept wondering why I couldn’t eliminate the interference and where exactly my loophole was. Why am I unable to break through the selfishness of the old universe? I knew the root causes were fear and affection for family, plus the Party’s lies. But I just couldn’t shake it off. I felt ashamed because I felt I let Master down.
I wanted to study the Fa and memorize the Fa. Compassionate Master saw me struggling and gave me a hint to break free from those corrupt thoughts. I used to memorize the Fa but stopped because my memory was poor. Before obtaining the Fa, I lost my memory, so I didn’t have the courage to continue. Since Master enlightened me to memorize the Fa, I must listen to Master and never give up, no matter how hard it was. I must do the three things well.
Master helped me as I was determined to walk the path he arranged. Gradually, I could stay focused, and I was able to recite a paragraph of Zhuan Falun and an entire chapter of Hong Yin every day. After reciting them, I felt a great sense of ease and understood the Fa principles at a deeper level. Master’s compassion is boundless, and he was depleted himself to save sentient beings, forbearing their countless sins and karma, the extent of which is beyond words. Thinking about this, I couldn’t hold back my tears of gratitude.
I went out to buy fruit and I gave the vendor 20 yuan which had information about Falun Dafa printed on them. He was angry when he saw this. I said it is better to believe in gods and Buddhas as there are many natural and man-made disasters these days. I told him I had a toothache and felt better a few days later, after I said the auspicious phrases on the bills. I told him doing this is very effective. The vendor changed his mind and happily accepted the truth-clarification currency.
On the way home, I suddenly realized these were kind thoughts I cultivated from the Fa! This is not something that can be done arbitrarily, but is based on supernormal principles.
Some time ago I returned to my hometown and met a former coworker. He recognized me straight away and excitedly complimented me, saying I still look as young and healthy as I did over 20 years ago when we last saw each other. I said I was blessed because I practice Falun Dafa. Then I told him the facts about the persecution of Dafa. I explained that information on the television and radio was propaganda, and the “Tiananmen self-immolation” hoax was fabricated by the CCP to frame Falun Dafa and slander Master Li Hongzhi. He said, “When I see how healthy you look I believe you.” He quit the CCP with his real name.
After saying goodbye to my old colleague, I realized that this time I did not hesitate and I clarified the truth. Since the CCP began persecuting Falun Dafa in 1999, I did not tell anyone in my workplace about Dafa because I was afraid I’d be reported. After this experience I understood that the ability to clarify the truth about the persecution is cultivated through Dafa itself—this is my heart sharing the purest, most compassionate information! I felt greater admiration for my fellow practitioners who have been telling the truth face-to-face for decades. The difference between our levels is huge. Although I cannot yet openly and proactively help save people with compassion, I’ve begun making breakthroughs.
My biggest obstacles right now are the attachments of fear, complacency, and laziness, as well as all sorts of delusions. I believe I can overcome them with strengthening from Master and Dafa, and with the help and encouragement of my fellow practitioners.
I am sharing my experiences to remind and encourage fellow practitioners. Please point out anything I’ve said that is not based on the Fa.
Thank you, Master. Thank you, fellow practitioners.