Greetings Respected Master; Greetings fellow practitioners,
I am thirteen years old. I have been practicing Dafa for half a year now and have been contemplating the purpose of human existence since I was a child. It perplexed me how the beginning of one's life is also the commencement of one's end. Now that I practice Dafa I have found the answers to my life's questions. I have come to understand that the purpose of one's life is to return to one's original, true self. One's life becomes meaningless if one does not know why he/she exists. If one chooses not to cultivate, one will, as Master Li said, build karma upon karma throughout his/her life.
I was born and brought up in communist China where I was indoctrinated to be loyal to the State, and had never doubted what the government had said. Since July 20, 1999, I had been bombarded by the propaganda of the Chinese government regarding so called "crimes" committed by Falun Gong: murder, suicide, arson, mental disorders due to the practice, self-immolation and so on. Because of the propaganda, I had not thought very highly of Falun Gong.
A few months after the crackdown, my father came to China to take me to the States. When in China, he clarified the truth about Falun Gong and told me what Falun Gong is. But instead of listening to him I urged him not to practice anymore and told him what I had heard from the propaganda. My father knew I was stubborn. He smiled whenever he heard my comments about Falun Gong and no longer pursued discussing Falun Gong with me.
After I arrived in the States, my father started clarifying the truth to me again and told me about some of the teachings of Dafa. Feeling skeptical, nevertheless, I started to learn a little bit more about Falun Gong. I still did not yet have any intention to understand more. One day, my father, my stepmother and I went shopping. On the way, my step-mom started playing the tapes of Master's lectures. I did not know at that time what the tapes were about, but I felt the immense peace and benevolence filter through his voice coming from the tapes. He said (the gist) that there exists a black kind of substance that we call "karma" and Buddhism calls "sinful karma." These black and white substances exist simultaneously. What kind of relationship do these two substances have? We obtain the white substance, de (virtue) through suffering, enduring setbacks and doing good deeds; the black substance is accrued by committing bad deeds and doing wrong things or bullying people. This man also talked about pre-historical culture and bringing people towards higher levels in cultivation. I was impressed as I felt he made much sense. I totally agreed with rewards for kind deeds and retribution for evil acts. I also thought that this man was very knowledgeable and concluded that he must have had a doctorate degree. I told my step-mom that the tapes were good and asked what they were all about. She told me right away that the man was Master Li, and that the tapes were the recordings of his lectures in Guongzhou. "What? Falun Gong?" I was totally taken aback. "Isn't the Chinese government condemning Falun Gong with full force through newspapers and TV programs?" My step-mom smiled and said, "Falun Gong practitioners are all good people who strive to go beyond the goodness of ordinary people."
That night I contemplated and was torn. What was Falun Gong? Was what Master Li said true? Also, my old questions came back: where did I come from and where was I going? Where was I heading? What was the purpose of my life? Did it mean that my life would only last a couple of decades? Was the beginning of one's life the commencement of its end? My thoughts were endless that night.
A few days later, my parents took me to group study at a practitioner's house. The house was packed with people. Knowing that they were all practitioners I did not venture to talk with them. Dad took me to a room and said, "You can watch TV here, but keep the noise down." I watched TV for a short while, but was somehow attracted by the activities outside. I decided to turn off the TV and proceeded to sit on the sofa behind the table where the practitioners were studying the Fa together. I listened carefully.
At the same time I thought of how my step-mom had been extremely nice to me, a child she hardly knew. In fact, I had never known any step-moms who were nicer. I wondered why the Chinese media depicted Falun Gong as something bad when, in reality, the practitioners I knew were all good people. I was amazed and perplexed at the same time. At last, I had to admit that fact is fact: Falun Gong practitioners were all kind people who put others before themselves.
I became a practitioner a few weeks after that night -- a genuine practitioner like everybody else. With the help of a few veteran practitioners my understanding of the Fa improved very quickly. I received the "Best Student for the Month of May Award," at my school although I had been in the States for only two months. Eleven students out of 1,800 were selected for the award and I was one of the eleven. I knew that I owed it to Dafa and Master Li who teaches me to be a student with good values as well as good learning habits.
Some of the practitioners commended me as someone with good enlightenment quality. I also consider myself a good and fast learner. I know what Master Li teaches is true. Due to my prior misguided thinking, which I am still not able to get rid of, at times I am skeptical about Dafa. For example, I had doubts how Master Li could protect his disciples in danger, until one day I experienced an incident first-hand. That day I had asked a few friends to play basketball in the park. I was early so I played on the slides. In front of me was some gym equipment. While I was sliding down, I was blinded by the setting sun and knocked my head against something round and hard. The force was so great that I slid beyond the monkey bars near the slide. I was not fully aware of what was going on until I stood up and saw the monkey bars and found that I was perfectly all right. I quickly examined myself. Not a bruise was on me. I knew right away that Master Li's fashen had protected me and stopped me from being hurt. It was just as Master Li said in Zhuan Falun, "If you truly follow the righteous way in cultivation practice, nobody will dare to do anything to you at will. Besides, you have the protection of my fashen, and you will not be in any danger."
I remember once I called my Mom in China to clarify the truth about Falun Gong to her. But knowing that my Mom's phone had been tapped I was hesitant. I thought to myself, that after all, she was in China and any conversation regarding Falun Gong would cause her troubles. So instead of talking about Falun Gong, I shared the bits and pieces of our teachings with her. But she was highly alert. Right away she picked it up and asked me whether I was practicing Falun Gong. I instantly sensed her distaste, as she was quite antagonistic towards Falun Gong. I said "So what's wrong with Falun Gong?" She said "Now you have to tell me whether you are practicing or not." I knew that I was getting into trouble. After I beat around the bush unsuccessfully, I hung up. But I felt very uneasy about what I did and wondered why I was so afraid to tell my Mom the truth. I reasoned with myself that I did that, of course, in order not to bring troubles to her. After all, it was for her good. But I did not feel peaceful. After an hour or so I realized that I was still attached to human sentiments: I did not want to bring her troubles. I remembered what Master Li once said, "Humans have great difficulty letting go of attachments. When you can truly discard an attachment, you will find that you haven't lost anything. Learning the Fa is itself a blessing. Why would you lose anything?" (Lecture at the First Conference in North America, 1998) I trusted Master Li. Why wasn't I able to do what he teaches? I pondered and found out the root cause: I did not have real faith. I thought I trusted him but, at a deeper level, I was skeptical about Dafa and the teachings of Master Li.
I decided that if my mother asked me again whether I practiced Falun Gong I would say yes. The following day, after I sent forth righteous thoughts, I called my Mom to tell her the truth. To my surprise she was quite calm and I was able to talk to her in the way I wanted to. I said what I should have said and Mom seemed to understand that I would not give up Falun Gong. She stopped dwelling on the topic. I hung up the phone. I knew that Dafa and my righteous thoughts had given me the power to successfully explain myself to my Mom.
I have been practicing for half a year now. I attended the conferences in Chicago and Washington, DC with my step-mom. I saw Master the first time at the DC Conference. I participated in the candlelight vigils at the Chinese Consulates in DC and Los Angeles. On both occasions I was fearful that the secret agents from the Consulates or the journalists would take my picture. The journalists did take my picture. I know that through this, Master Li was pointing out to me the attachment of fear, a fear that I find extremely difficult to relinquish. Then, I thought of Master Li. He said (the gist) that in Gods' eyes, both humans and the earth are impure. Earth is a place feared and dreaded by whoever comes here. But in order to save us, our benevolent Master has silently endured these things! No one knows how much he has suffered for our sake!
I think about practitioners in China who, when faced with the choice of life and death, use their lives to validate Dafa. They are not the people I can compare myself with. What they have endured is more than I can imagine. If not for our benevolent Master, I would have been kept in the dark about Dafa, and, like many other people in China, I would condemn Dafa. It is our benevolent Master who has saved me. My gratitude toward him is beyond words. Nevertheless, I want to say "Thank you, Master. Master, you have been going through a lot because of us!"
In China, there are numerous youths who know nothing of the truth of Dafa. They have no idea that defamation of Dafa will bring severe punishment. Let's be in tune with the progress of Fa-rectification, clarify the truth to people and use our benevolence and actions to tell them that Falun Dafa is good!
The power of benevolence is immense.
Practitioners are powerful because we cultivate the universal principle of "Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance."
Thank you.
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