(Clearwisdom.Net)
1. Making a Wish to Cultivate
I had longed to be a nun when I was a young child. I often said, "I will become a Buddhist nun after I grow up." Once an old man told me, "You should not say this carelessly. If one swears to be a nun, Buddha will arrange it for her." I said, "I do have such a wish deep in my heart. In a few decades of a human lifetime, fame and personal interests are like clouds and mist that disappear. There is nothing left after death. This is not very gratifying." Many people think that those who want to leave home for cultivation are those who have been hurt or upset by the secular world and wanted to escape from it. In fact, my family is well situated and my life has been smooth and successful. However, the wish to become a nun had haunted my mind always.
2. Omission with Dafa
In 1997, I went back to China to visit my family. Someone lent me a copy of Zhuan Falun. I read through the book carefully. Later on, the person who lent me the book asked me, "What do you think of this book?" I said, "It's good! But, I don't think it is possible for human beings to achieve 'Truthfulness, Compassion, and Forbearance.' It's not good if one can't do it. It's useless if no one can achieve it." He told me, "Why can't one achieve "Truthfulness, Compassion, and Forbearance? I can do it." I laughed loudly, "That's because you don't know what Truthfulness, Compassion, and Forbearance is."
In 1998, I saw the book Zhuan Falun again in America. Somebody lent the book to a friend of mine at a party. My friend asked me, "Do you want to read it?" I replied,"I have read it."
In the year 2000, I saw a Falun Dafa poster in a park. A young lady sat by the poster. I talked with her about Falun Gong. She just said, "Wonderful, Falun Dafa is wonderful!" I never joined them due to my arrogance. I thought that the practitioners did not show any profoundness. If they had very limited understanding on Buddha Law, what could they share?
3. Steps on the Way Home
In 2001, I noticed that Jiang Zemin's regime was persecuting Falun Gong. At the time, I was surprised to see that Falun Gong practitioners had been so indomitable. I said to my husband, "Nowadays, are there any Chinese who would struggle for their practice and even sacrifice their lives for righteousness?" My husband said, "Didn't the XX Party members sacrifice their lives and fight incessantly for their beliefs?" I said, "That's different. The Party members struggled for their living stimulated by the sentiment of unfairness and hatred. At that time, Japan was invading China. The masses lived in dire poverty. Many people fought either for their living or for fame and self-interest. Their ideals included notions of fame and profit. Therefore, those Chinese people were actually fighting for their lives, the country, and fame and self-interest rather than for a pure upright belief. Throughout China's history, few people have fought for pure and non-material beliefs. However, the word 'belief' should not be entangled with the interests of a nation or a country. Belief should be considered as pursuing a way to detach from the cycle of life and death, a way to become a Buddha or deity. Chinese people have become very pragmatic after they experienced so many political movements. They have learned how to be worldly, smart, and to play it safe. They have been focused on acquiring material interests. Sometimes, in order to protect themselves, they even hurt others. Especially in recent years, they fight for tiny bits of self-interest. It is almost impossible to find any Chinese people who would strive for their belief in Buddha."
My husband said, " I think that Falun Gong is a political organization." I said, "On the contrary. Chinese people are so shrewd and pragmatic that, even if they fight for political power, fame, and self-interest, they would never throw straw against wind. Besides, Falun Gong has neither a political agenda nor armed struggle. In addition, there are many elderly people who practice Falun Gong. These people have suffered the upheavals of many political movements. How could they suddenly indulge in a wild fantasy to overthrow the Party and seize power? They must be fighting for their beliefs. I need to learn more about Falun Gong."
I used to think that I didn't have to practice "Truthfulness, Compassion, and Forbearance" because nobody could achieve it. I was greatly shocked to see that so many people have been working to achieve it and refuse to give up even under persecution. I decided to get to know them and try to figure out how they could do it, and how much they have achieved. I told myself: if they can do it, I can do it, too.
I met with a practitioner again in April 2001 and asked him about Falun Gong. He was very enthusiastic. He talked to me for quite a while and brought me a copy of Zhuan Falun. I immediately read the book for the second time and called him to borrow all the other books by the Teacher. I went through all these books and began to attend their group study; I both shared and argued with them. Afterwards, I attended the Experience Sharing Conference in New York and Washington DC. In the meantime, I learned the five sets of exercises. Little by little, I gave up the attachments of self-conceit and gradually enlightened to Dafa principles. I had the feeling of finally attaining Dafa after waiting for thousands of years. I feel as if I have no more fears of death.
Regarding Dafa, I always had the feeling that I had enlightened to much but could not express it in words. Human language and secular cultures lag far behind the great Fa of the cosmos. Hence if someone asked me, "How is Falun Dafa?" I could only answer with one word, "Good." Using a pure heart to read the book, you will understand when you enlighten to it.
4). After thousands of years of waiting, a long-cherished wish becomes true.
The above is my experience in obtaining Dafa. Looking back, I had many notions and obstacles to overcome.
Taking myself as an example, I have transmigrated many times through the cycles of death and rebirth. In every lifetime I wanted to be free of this cycle of life and death, so I left home for cultivation many times. However, without a genuine Fa, how could I break through this cycle? Blocked by worldly attachments, karma and arrogance, I missed Dafa several times even though I had been waiting for it for thousands of years. I attained the Fa thanks to the practitioners who whole-heartedly guarded the Fa and spread the Fa. Their efforts to guard the Fa stunned me, and their deeds to spread the Fa gave me the chance to hear about Dafa from time to time. Finally, I obtained the Fa.
It is not easy to obtain a human body; it is even more difficult to hear the Fa. At the time when Buddha Sakyamuni and Jesus were spreading their cultivation methods to bring salvation to the people, how many people could really hear it? Today, bathed in the compassion of the Lord of the Buddhas, we have TV, Internet, and all kinds of modern communication tools to let people know the Fa. But with the blockage of karma and worldly attachments, how many people can really attain the Fa? Taking myself as an example, I used to believe that I had good inborn quality and enlightenment quality. I also believed that I had a good predestined relationship with the Buddha Fa. Yet, I still neglected Dafa time after time. I obtained the Fa after the Teacher taught it for almost nine years and when Falun Gong had become well known to people overseas. It became less difficult because I have lived overseas for many years and therefore was less influenced by the propaganda by the Chinese government. It looks easy to attain the Fa, but actually it is rather difficult.
I understand why the Teacher keeps waiting and waiting. Dafa practitioners in different countries and areas seem to be individuals, but actually are an integrated body. Teacher does not want to leave any practitioners behind. At the same time, many practitioners have sacrificed a lot to maintain this integrated body. The persecution has lasted for more than two years. The Teacher is still waiting for us. Many practitioners risk their lives to wake us up, to awaken those who should have obtained Dafa but are too lost in the maze. Teacher has borne too much for us who are delayed in obtaining Dafa. Some Dafa practitioners have lost their lives for those of us who were delayed in obtaining Dafa.
Finally we became practitioners! We have been staggering on our way of cultivation and even stumbling along sometimes. We still have many ordinary notions and everyday people's attachments. However, we gradually catch up to the torrent of Fa-rectification. Our steps are becoming firm and our minds more steadfast. Currently, the evil forces have become more and more rampant in the persecution, utilizing the cruelest means. The evil demons are making their last struggle; it is the darkness before the dawn, and daybreak will follow.
It took me a while to start writing after obtaining Dafa. Today, I write this article because I am inspired from the bottom of my heart and compelled to write it. First, I'd like to tell everybody how the veteran practitioners' spreading and guarding Dafa helped latecomers like me to obtain Dafa. Second, I want to say that obtaining Dafa seems easy, but actually it is very difficult. Third, I am really inspired from my inner self and just want to cry out to the heavens and to the Teacher, "We are coming! Finally we have become practitioners! Everyone should thank the Teacher for waiting for us for so long. We should thank the veteran practitioners for waiting for us for so long."
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