(Clearwisdom.net)
I attained Falun Dafa one month after I traveled from China to Germany for graduate study. Although I strive to be the best among ordinary people, in cultivation practice however, I am not really a diligent student so far as striving forward vigorously is concerned and I am far away from Teacher's requirements. Since the suppression of Falun Gong began in July 1999, I have participated in only individual cultivation practice. Through studying the Fa, reading Clearwisdom.net, and via help from fellow practitioners I gradually stepped forward from human notions. Before that, I started my Master's thesis.
The earlier part of my thesis went smoothly, and later I encountered a bottleneck. I consulted two specialist professors but they had no good suggestions.
Meanwhile, as Fa rectification was progressing, the evil forces manifested a relentless state. Practitioners overseas have exposed the evil using all means, and there have been more and more fact-clarifying activities. The fear I felt was becoming less and less each day. Because of my persistence in studying the Fa, and experience sharing with fellow practitioners, I started to be more and more clear-headed regarding Fa principles.
Since I joined Fa-spreading activities out of town, sometimes for a few days, I cherished the rest of my time very much by reducing my sleeping time and working on my thesis. Although I could spend only a little bit of time each week on my thesis, during discussion with my thesis-directing professor, I was able to propose new problem-solving ideas. Sometimes, during the conversation, a breakthrough would pop up in my mind. However, progress on my thesis came to a halt after I failed to get expected results from various calculation methods. Thus I was in limbo for a while. As I had been successful in my graduate study, I felt that I must have some problem with my cultivation practice and I should search inwardly and reflect upon my inner self.
Some other practitioners saw my tight schedule and they reminded me not to be attached to doing things for Dafa while neglecting my own graduate study, which was also important as a way of validating Dafa. So I started thinking calmly, asking myself, "why did I stop?" Was my heart impure? How was I to balance time for cultivation practice, spreading the Fa, and working on my thesis? Through diligent Fa-study, I realized that first I must be a Dafa practitioner and then be a graduate student. Therefore, I must step forward to rectify the Fa and clarify the truth. But how would I deal with my graduate study and thesis work? My understanding from studying the Fa, is that that Teacher wanted practitioners to be good people no matter where he or she is and to do his or her job well anywhere.
Should my thesis fail, how would people think of me as a practitioner? At that point I enlightened to firming up my heart of righteous cultivation practice and to trying my best to do the thesis work, but not caring much about others' thoughts. Thus I was passively trying to squeeze out a little bit of time to work on my thesis. In spite of my efforts, my thesis progress was very slow. Seeing my failure with so many trials and errors, my professor understood the actual difficulty and he guessed there would be not much hope for my thesis.
One day, as I was reciting "Lunyu" (the preface of the Dafa book Zhuan Falun), the very first sentence showed up clearly in my mind that "The Buddha Fa is most profound." Then how could this low layer of human knowledge limit me, a profound Fa practitioner? As I was thinking of this Fa principle, a 3-dimensional math model suddenly displayed as a picture in my brain, rotating constantly and realistically. Although I enlightened to this layer of Fa, I knew that in the bottom of my heart there still existed some deep attachment waiting to be found.
Then one night as I slept, another picture popped up from memory. It was the event occurring on the very night before I went abroad. My cousin said: "When you finish school and come back from Germany, bring me a Benz car." I smiled at her and replied: "When I return, I may still be poor in money terms, but a diploma in my skillful hands will be sufficient for me to depend on." When I woke up, the dream was still vividly clear. After all, this was the attachment hiding deeply in my heart. At that moment I felt lighter at heart and clear throughout my body as being free from the heavy human burden.
What followed was nothing but smooth sailing with my thesis. As long as I became tranquil, and removed from the everyday people's knowledge and thought boundaries, many maths models would naturally appear in my mind. To me this was what Teacher said about the effects of a practitioner's maturing in wisdom. Later I was more devoted to the vast current of Fa-rectification and started to clarify Falun Gong facts to the professors and other people around me at the university. My time schedule was still tight, but during my busy daily activities I was no longer hectic or disorganized.
Soon I completed two thorough and precise solutions to finish my Master's thesis that even helped improve what my professor had overlooked in his previous computer simulation papers. So I graduated with excellent grades both in my thesis and in my overall study. This thesis became a crucial part of my professor's research arena as well as becoming a blueprint for a research paper published in a famous international academic journal. Furthermore, it was awarded as one of the best theses of the year by a professional association. Thus I got a research assistant job at the university and stayed on to study for my Ph.D. degree. This way I have more opportunities to tell people the facts about Falun Dafa.
When I came across Chinese people on the street in Germany, I calmly and nicely told them the facts about Falun Gong as well as I am studying for a Ph.D. degree. During our conversations, I did not show off, nor did they get jealous. Furthermore, I sensed others' understanding of, and their respect for Dafa from their eyes.
When I look back on my road of cultivation practice, I still feel that I have a gap from Teacher's requirements. Thus I always remind myself to continue striving forward vigorously.
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