(Clearwisdom.net)
Greetings Master, Greetings fellow practitioners:
I would like to take this precious opportunity of the second Mainland China Internet Experience Sharing Conference to report to Master and fellow practitioners how I have built a cultivation environment and a family-based truth materials production site, and convey my understandings during the process of doing these things.
I began practicing Falun Gong around New Years in 1999. Before I started cultivating, I had strong attachments to reputation, fame and self-interest, which exhausted me. I also fought with my husband constantly. After I started practicing, although my temper became better, the conflicts with my husband were still not resolved. The loopholes in my personal cultivation created a lot of obstacles for my Fa validation later.
In March 2002 the managers at my workplace used a false pretence to take me to a brainwashing class and I lost my job. Under this huge mental pressure I wrote a guarantee statement renouncing Dafa, for which I still feel regret. After I was released from the brainwashing class and I was able to study the Fa more, I soon realized my mistake.
On April 18 I asked my fellow practitioners to publish my "solemn statement" on the Clearwisdom.net website to invalidate all the false statements that I had made. The police department and my employer knew that I was not "reformed," so they always came to my house to harass me and my family. My husband yelled at me every day, for he blamed me for the troubles. He even thought about cooperating with the evildoers to send me to the brainwashing class again. During the May First holiday in 2002, the harassment from my workplace became more frequent. It seemed that they would take me away at any moment.
On the afternoon of May 8, I went to a local materials production site. Before I left, I sent my six year old child to my mother's place. I didn't dare to talk to my husband face to face; instead, I left him a note. I left after he went to work.
I stayed at the materials production site for six months. During this time, to avoid making trouble for other practitioners I didn't go home once and didn't see my husband either. I only wrote to him twice, hoping that he would learn the truth of the persecution.
In October 2002, prior to the Communist Party's 16th National Conference, the evildoers launched a huge campaign to arrest practitioners. Other practitioners and I were arrested. I was first jailed in a detention center and then sent to a brainwashing class. One day my husband and sister in law rushed angrily into the room where I was being detained. I had been on a hunger strike then for seven days. They yelled at me and cursed me badly. While they were yelling at me with such harsh language I was calm and not at all moved. I was only thinking about how I could escape and devote myself to Fa-rectification again. Because of my solid belief in Master, I denied the persecution by the old forces. After being on hunger strike for 13 days I was unconditionally released with Master's protection.
The third day after my release, [being at home again] since I was doing all kinds of housework, my husband thought that I had already physically recovered from the hunger strike, so he asked me for a divorce. I was not shocked. I was calm and aware that I had left him for six months, and this would be really hard for an ordinary person to endure. Due to my loopholes in cultivation I didn't clarify the truth to him very well. It was understandable that he wanted to divorce me. I blamed myself for the situation.
I said to him, "I understand why you want a divorce. But for the sake of our child, I do not want it. I did leave you for six months, for which I feel sorry, but the reason I left was not because I didn't want this family. I was concerned for my safety, and eventually the safety of this family; however, if you really insist, I won't stop you." After I said that I realized that everything happens for a reason. It may be a test from the old forces that he wanted the divorce, and I should not accept this evil test. So I sent forth righteous thoughts, "if this is the arrangement from the old forces, I won't accept it." I also cleaned out the evil factors behind him.
One month later I asked him if he had thought it over. He told me, "If I divorced you, what would I do after Falun Gong gets redressed in the future?" I could tell that he was changing. I didn't stop sending forth righteous thoughts to clean out the evil factors that were an obstacle for him to listen to the truth. My mother also helped me to send forth righteous thoughts. We kept doing this, and he kept changing. Sometimes, after reading the truth materials he was not satisfied and asked for more. Sometimes when I forgot to send forth righteous thoughts, he would remind me.
We can only save sentient beings if we can cultivate ourselves well. I remind myself at every moment that I am a cultivator. With my xinxing level climbing, my husband became better and better. He read more and more truth information and also started to clarify the truth to his friends. He often told me that he would do well in his business and honor Falun Gong. He also said that he would try his best to make more money so that he could open a factory and hire the Falun Gong practitioners who had lost their jobs under the persecution. Occasionally I knew that he was bragging, but I still felt happy about his change. I kept encouraging him.
During the May First holiday in 2004, my sister, brother-in-law and my husband went on a tour. During the tour they had lunch at a hotel. That night, my brother-in-law and my husband felt pain in their stomachs. They vomited and had bad diarrhea. My husband felt OK after midnight, but my brother-in-law had to go to a hospital and got an injection. My husband asked me afterwards if I knew what he was thinking when he felt most uncomfortable. I said that I didn't know. He smiled and said, "I was chanting 'Falun Dafa is good.'" Then I said, "Master will definitely help you if you can think of Falun Dafa at the crucial moment. No wonder you got better so soon. It is really good that you had such a righteous thought." He also helped me frequently to do Dafa work. Since he has a car, he often helped me to deliver truth materials.
In October 2004, fellow practitioners suggested I learn how to use a computer and build up a family-based truth materials production site. Soon after I agreed, a local practitioner came to my house to teach me how to use a computer and also brought a lot of computer supplies. When I was learning to use the computer my husband was out of town, so he didn't know about it yet, but I was not worried, for I knew that he would agree.
A few days later he returned. I told him about our plan, including about the significance of a family-based materials production site in terms of rescuing sentient beings. I also tried to dismiss his concerns about safety and money. He didn't say "yes" or "no." I started producing the materials. The problem I had was with the delivery of the supplies. I sent forth righteous thoughts first, and then discussed the issue with my husband, hoping that he would support me, and offer to deliver these things with his car. I told him that he would accumulate a lot of de if he did so. He agreed without hesitation. The problem was solved so easily.
Sometimes I choose some articles from the Clearwisdom.net website that I thought he could understand, and read them to him. I also gave him Master's new articles. Later on he was not satisfied with the truth articles. He asked for more of the practitioners' experience sharing articles and also commented on them from his point of view. If an article fit his viewpoint he would praise it; otherwise he would criticize it. I told him, "The fact that you can have opinions about these articles means that you already have some understanding about the Fa, but you should not to be so judgmental. Those practitioners have been cultivating for so many years, and you haven't started yet. How can you judge others?"
Last November, another practitioner and I had planned to go to a fellow practitioners' house to do some experience sharing. I asked my husband if he wanted to go too. He was happy to go. He gave us a ride to the practitioner's house, which was seven miles away. After we started sharing my husband became excited. He asked many serious questions about things he didn't understand. Some of them were even aggressive. He pointed out my shortcomings in front of other practitioners. I knew that his behavior was to test my xinxing. Master has said,
"Since you're cultivators and you're among ordinary people, you just have to listen to those displeasing words, and you have to be able to listen to those displeasing words." (Teaching the Fa at the 2004 Chicago Conference)
My heart was not moved. Practitioners in the group first validated to him that he had indeed shared some profound thoughts, then they clarified the truth to him in detail. The process of the practitioners' truth clarification answered many of my husband's questions and achieved the affect of cleaning out more of the evil factors in other dimensions that contributed to his lack of clarity about the Fa. When he left the room, my fellow practitioners pointed out my attachment - a provoking kind of mentality. I know that Master arranged this opportunity for us to see our shortcomings. The experience sharing also helped my husband to eventually obtain the Fa.
My husband gets an inflamed and sore throat every winter. When it becomes cold outside, he would start coughing. One day, after getting a shot at the hospital I said to him, "Why don't you watch Master's Dalian lecture? You have so much time now anyway." He replied, "OK, please find it for me. I will watch it." I told him to watch it from beginning to end instead of just picking and choosing what he liked. I told him the reason was because it was not an everyday teaching - every part is important..
I went to my mother's house and stayed there for a week. During that week my mother and I kept sending forth righteous thoughts to clean out the evil factors behind my husband, including those that were an obstacle for him to obtain the Fa. When I got back home on Saturday I discovered that he was about to finish the last video of the lecture series. After he finished it he was happy and told me, "Dafa is so profound. I would not know this much by merely observing your behavior." I knew that this was Master using my husband's words to let me realize that I should cultivate myself better.
I didn't develop a happy mindset because of his obtaining the Fa. I thought it was natural that he should obtain the Fa at some point. I continued to send forth righteous thoughts to help him as he started reading through all of Master's articles. He read them day and night. Soon, he had read all of them and learned the exercises. He asked me to wake him up every morning to do the exercises. When he was a common person he was quite lazy, and never got up before 8:00 a.m. The most important thing is that he quit drinking and gambling as soon as he started reading the Fa. Through him I saw the supernormal power of Dafa and Master's benevolence. It was not coincidence that my husband obtained the Fa as soon as I started the family-based materials production site.
Master has said, "When you conduct yourselves righteously Master can do anything for you." (Touring North America to Teach the Fa)
Actually, Master is with us at every single moment. As long as we are altruistic, no tribulation or difficulty can stop us. Positive changes in our family members depend on how well we ourselves raise our xinxing. Our family members are actually mirrors, which can reflect our cultivation improvement over time.
My husband reads every issue of the Minghui Weekly. He always asks me if the new issue is published yet. Sometimes he will read articles on the computer before I print them out. Gradually, his understanding of the Fa became deeper and deeper. Every fellow practitioner who came to our house and talked with him used to praise him, saying that he has such high, inborn quality. The praise made him feel very happy. I reminded him not to develop a happy mindset and also told other practitioners not to praise him directly. He did all kinds of Dafa work, and his car also became our tool to deliver Dafa materials. He always said to me proudly that his car is his Fa-implement.
After the Nine Commentaries were published and my husband read the 5th commentary, "On the Collusion of Jiang Zemin with the CCP to Persecute Falun Gong," his attitude changed sharply. He yelled at me, saying, "You guys said that you won't get political. Isn't this getting political? Does cultivation have anything to do with the CCP? Now I have started doubting my belief, and you should also think about it carefully, otherwise you will regret it when you realize that you have been tricked."
I realized that this happened because the CCP's evil spirit was controlling him. So, I went into the bedroom and sent forth righteous thoughts to clean out the CCP's evil spirit in his field. Then I gave him Master's lecture, "Teaching the Fa at the 2004 International Fa Conference in New York." I sent forth righteous thoughts to clean out the CCP's evil spirits from his field at 8:00, 9:00, and 10:00 p.m. The next day he became his usual self again and it seemed that nothing had happened.
A few days later he asked me for a copy of the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party. He read them from the beginning to the end and then he quit the CCP youth group. He even went to his brother's home and convinced him to quit the CCP. He also convinced his co-workers to quit the CCP.
Now, he is still clarifying the truth to people, and doing the three things well. Although there are some small setbacks, he is walking solidly on the path of cultivation. I believe that he will fulfill his previous historic vows and not betray Master's benevolent salvation.
November 7, 2005
(Article from the Second Mainland China Internet Experience Sharing Conference)
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Category: Improving Oneself
