(Clearwisdom.net) I am a 10th grader. For the several years since I had obtained Dafa, I have conducted myself according to "Truthfulness, Compassion and Forbearance" and improved myself to become a better person. I am continuing to purify myself and making myself more rational. My grades have jumped up to be among the top 10 in the class, whereas I used to be last in my class. I was admitted a prominent provincial high school and recognized in my school for "moral character." All of this was the result of believing in Teacher and Dafa, and raising my xinxing as a part of cultivation.
My mom obtained Dafa in 1996 and I frequently went with her to a group practice. I was small at that time. I sometimes read, watched practice videotapes, played on the side or did my homework. When practitioners shared experiences with each other, I sat there and listened quietly. I did not have my Third Eye open, but I definitely believed in Teacher and Dafa. When the group started practicing the Falun Gong sitting meditation, I practiced with them. Once I felt such pain during the sitting meditation that I was in tears, but I did not give up and completed the whole section.
After the nationwide suppression of Falun Gong started on July 20, 1999, the environment for practicing took a drastic turn for the worse, but the persecution certainly did not frighten Dafa practitioners. They followed Teacher's lectures and new articles, and disciplined themselves according to the Dafa standards. Several people spontaneously established a practice group.
I repeatedly went with my mom to distribute truth-clarifying flyers. One night, we distributed a thousand flyers throughout a village and painted words that clarified the truth on walls. Later, many practitioners went to Beijing to appeal for Falun Gong, and my mom was one of them. She was arrested, detained, and did not come back, even at the Chinese New Year. I was just a junior in middle school then. My father had to work daily and could not come back to fix lunch for me. After a discussion with my grandma, she agreed to come and take care of me. I continued going to school like I used to, but life was different without my mom. After school I kept thinking that I should discipline myself with a higher standard like I did before, or even better. Although my mom was not around, I had Teacher by my side and had Dafa. I still remember whenever I walked out the door to school, my mom would tell me, "Remember, if others bump into when you walk, don't get upset or swear at others, don't strike back when others provoke you." "I know," I would reply as usual. I want to cultivate myself and had no fear.
At school I had a good relationship with my classmates. I treated them with compassion and kindness. I purposefully gave up self-interests on account of others. I did not compete or fight for personal gain. Unfortunately, I no longer had a group practice environment, not until my mom would be released from prison. My mother has been detained twice, which made me experience different cultivation states. I did something wrong, which I regretted, but no matter what I had done, I refused to acknowledge it and would do as Teacher has arranged.
Since my mother's release, my mom and I study, practice, and send the righteous thoughts on a daily basis and help each other improve. She told me how Dafa practitioners in prison persisted in cultivating Dafa and strove to establish a good environment. Those true stories inspired me, so I could realize my weaknesses. We spent a lot of our time memorizing Teacher's new articles. When she was cooking or cleaning the room, she would say one sentence and I would follow with the next. I memorized the article when I was walking. With my mom's help, I was able to memorize Teacher's Hong Yin. I frequently sent righteous thoughts when I was walking, helped my mom to pick up and deliver Dafa flyers to fellow practitioners for distribution, and hung up Dafa banners on the walls or trees.
The local police frequently visited and harassed us, and I negated their activities by sending righteous thoughts. When my mom was abducted the second time, the police searched our home. One came to my room and tried to take something away. I said firmly, "Don't touch that." As a result, the police left my room empty-handed.
One other time three police officers stopped by our home. They said someone reported Dafa material being present in my home, and they would conduct a search. I went to my room quickly and sent righteous thoughts. In the meantime, my mom told police the facts about Falun Gong in the other room. After a while one of them said, "Hurry up and let's go! Otherwise we will be reformed by them."
I remember a long time ago when my mom went to my schoolteacher to clarify the facts and handed the teacher a truth-clarifying CD. The teacher said to her, " I agree with freedom of belief and that Falun Gong is good; nevertheless, children should not practice, children should..." making a reference to my bad grades.
Mother came back and had a long conversation with me. She explained how important my grades are from the Dafa point of view. She said, "Having good grades is the best way for a student to validate the Fa, because you are a Dafa practitioner. You know that Falun Gong is good by studying and cultivating Dafa. The ordinary people who do not have the practice and cultivation experience would not able to see the goodness of Dafa unless your behavior mirrors that. If you are good and have good grades, they will say that you are good and Falun Gong is good."
After improving my understanding through Fa study, I committed to listening carefully during the class and completing all or almost all of my homework at school, and to study, cultivate and to send righteous thoughts after school.
Soon, I had vast improvements on my final exams. Classes for the final year in middle school would be rearranged based on the final grades from the previous year. I felt pressure and worried about my disposition. My mom realized that and exchanged understandings with me based on the Fa. I became clear that my plans were not for personal gain. I let go of the attachment and studied the Fa with a peaceful mind.
The next day at the school I was assigned to a better class. I was ranked the last in the class based on my grades. Six months after, my grade was among the top ten in the class. I was later admitted to a high school, which was also a good provincial high school.
At high school, I continue cultivating in Dafa, studying the Fa, sending righteous thoughts and clarifying the facts. Once, when a classmate swore at me, I replied with words from Teacher's poem "To Be a Human" (Hong Yin) and told him that swearing was wrong. My classmates marveled at my response and showed their respect.
I have realized that I would earn a better grade as a human being when my thoughts and actions are based on the Fa.
The above is my personal understanding. Please kindly point out anything improper.
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