(Clearwisdom.net) Recently a local practitioner in her fifties passed away. She and I had been detained together in a labor camp. Due to the brutal persecution, she wrote the three statements against her will and was released last year. Although she wrote a solemn declaration to void those statements, she could not completely escape the shadow of the labor camp and was plagued by illnesses. The situation became very serious and eventually she passed away. This incident shocked me greatly, because I had also seriously stumbled before.
Due to my various attachments and interference from my thought karma, I have taken some detours and made many mistakes during the five years of persecution. This includes writing the three statements. In my severely depressed moments, I almost ruined the most precious opportunity of cultivating in Falun Dafa. Because of our Teacher's great mercy, who gave me hints, encouraged me to keep going and arranged for several fellow practitioners to help me, I was finally able to break through the interference and resume the path of cultivation practice.
In a solemn declaration, one should realize and analyze the root of the mistake
For practitioners who have taken a detour, making a solemn declaration is not merely a formality. It also truly destroys the excuse that the old forces use to persecute us in other dimensions.
I took a detour in the past, but I have yet to make a serious and earnest declaration. I only wrote a few sentences in general and asked someone to send it to the Minghui website to be published. I have never conscientiously reflected on and analyzed the detour that I took.
I lived with formidable constraints for a long time after I got out of the labor camp. Nevertheless, due to human notions, I would only talk about things that I did well, not wanting to expose things that I did not do well. Therefore, I did not genuinely realize the seriousness of the mistakes I had made and did not make a resolution to rectify myself. That declaration I made was indeed only a formality.
With persistent Fa-study, I realized that any attempt to cover up or dismiss my past mistakes as unimportant, whether on purpose or not, is not correct. I made the mistakes because my xinxing had not reached a high level in that respect. As time went on, those mistakes began to fade in my memory. If I make a declaration today, will my xinxing reach a higher level automatically? I realized that however high one's xinxing is at the time of the fall, in the rectification of oneself, one has to start from that same point. In other words, one has to "retake" a failed test. I am not saying that we have to go through the old forces' arrangement again, since we must not acknowledge the old forces. But things to test xinxing in this aspect will emerge. Therefore, if we truly want to ascend, we must face the mistakes we made before. Also, we have to carefully analyze the reason why we failed at that time, summarize the experience and the lessons, and do better in the future. Because we are knowingly practicing cultivation, it is not correct if we do not know what we are doing. Therefore, it is necessary to revisit in detail what led us to the mistake and conscientiously analyze the reason.
Making a declaration is not shouting a slogan. We must do what is expressed in the declaration
The solemn declaration we make destroys the agreement with the old forces, and it denies the old forces' arrangements. After writing it, when we come back to cultivate and improve ourselves again, the old forces will have no excuse to drag us down or bind us. Just because we write a solemn declaration, however, our shortcomings will not improve automatically. Furthermore, we must not think, "Teacher will not give up on me, so I am insured" and stop being strict with ourselves. We also should not think, "I made a mistake today, but I will be OK if I do well tomorrow." After failing to pass the test the next day, we then think, "It will be okay as long as I do well the day after tomorrow." This is not taking Teacher's mercy solemnly and seriously.
Teacher did say that, "It doesn't matter that you fell down, it doesn't matter! Quickly get up!" ("Explaining the Fa during the 2003 Lantern Festival at the U.S. West Fa Conference") However, Dafa's standard is unambiguous. Even after a practitioner has made a declaration, in order to openly and nobly pass similar xinxing tests, he or she still has to bear hardships, and it is not just lip service.
Under severe persecution in labor camps, some practitioners wrote the three statements against their will. As a result, the persecution of their human body was reduced, and things became easier. They could eat and sleep better and were able to regain some strength. Later, when they awakened and declared the "three statements" to be null and void, immediately the persecution became severe again and they ended up writing another set of "three statements" that were even worse. This is because they had not ascended to a higher level in their cultivation, so they could not pass the test. At that time I did not even have the courage to declare the "three statements" I had written to be null and void. I only wanted to survive until I had served my term, so that I could leave that evil den.
Although I had this understanding, I always used being "busy" as an excuse and did not seriously rewrite a solemn declaration. After carefully examining myself, I found this thought, "I have denied the old forces in my heart. Although having my declaration published on Minghui.net is important, it is not absolutely required. Because I have written it once, it's fine to wait a little to take the second step." So I delayed, day after day. Now I realize that this is accepting the old forces' arrangements and helping them achieve their goal of continuing to manipulate me.
Lately my attachments to fear and lust arose again, and I committed another wrongdoing. With the arrival of the news that my fellow practitioner who had written a solemn declaration passed away, I found that I had to take the solemn declaration issue more seriously. I decided to check out how I had written my earlier statement. I searched for it, but I could not find my declaration on Minghui.net. It was not until then that I realized the seriousness of the problem. Therefore, I put down all the "busy" things at hand and started to write this solemn declaration seriously and conscientiously. I declare all my words and behaviors in the past that did not comply with Dafa to be null and void, and I thoroughly deny the old forces' arrangements. I will carefully dig out every mistake I have made before, one by one, and declare all those wrongdoings to be null and void.
February 22, 2005
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