(Clearwisdom.net)
Greetings, esteemed Master! Greetings, fellow practitioners!
Our great and benevolent Teacher created this format for cultivation practice for us to utilize while conforming as much as possible to ordinary society. Such a format makes it possible for our minds to be directly affected in ordinary society. We are also able to personally contact and rescue sentient beings in various life situations.
" the whole process of cultivation is a process of constantly getting rid of human attachments." (Zhuan Falun, 2003 version)
Today I will share my cultivation experiences.
Eliminating My Fear in Validating Dafa and Rescuing Sentient Beings
"Fear is a death trap on a human being's journey toward divinity." ("Pass the Deadly Test")
I have experienced evident fear twice. Once was on July 20, 1999, when the evil Party began the extensive persecution of Dafa. The other time was right after the publication of the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party.
Following July 20, 1999, the authorities defamed our esteemed Master and Dafa. Practitioners were illegally arrested, detained, and tortured. Many lost their jobs, their families, and even their lives. Practitioners were faced with the choice of life or death. Fear was the biggest attachment, determining whether practitioners could step out to validate Dafa.
Other practitioners were unhesitatingly stepping forward to validate Dafa. With our faith in Teacher and faith in the Fa, a few practitioners and I joined the mighty torrent of validating Dafa, clarifying the truth, and rescuing sentient beings. We were persecuted to differing degrees and had to endure being fined large sums of money, illegal detention, being fired from our jobs, being forced to attend brainwashing sessions, and having all financial support cut off. These tribulations severely affected our personal gain, our positions, and our families. The fear of losing these often was exposed.
Nevertheless, the thought of safeguarding Dafa subdued my fear. I still clearly remember how afraid I was when I first went out to clarify the truth and distribute truth-clarification materials. Over time I learned to do it better, as I clarified the truth in a more comprehensive way. I have experienced the mentality of doing things as if I were completing a task, showing off, competing, and so on. I was reported to the police and arrested when I did not do things rationally. Slowly but surely the path became wider and wider. My understanding of the Fa improved. It was a gradual process of eliminating my attachments and postnatally developed notions.
Righteous thoughts come from the Fa. Prior to going out to validate Dafa each time, I sent forth righteous thoughts to eliminate all evil factors that might cause interference and damage. The fear gradually diminished in the course of strengthening my faith in the Fa, my righteous thoughts, and my patience and compassion toward sentient beings. From initially not knowing what to do or even going to extremes, I gradually grew more mature and serene.
Once I was beaten by a group of prisoners in a detention center in Beijing. A prisoner questioned me when he beat me, "Are you coming to Beijing again? If you say yes, I will disable you." The environment was frightening. I rid of my fear, cleared my mind, and told him loudly that I would come again. The prisoners immediately stopped beating me. Eliminating the fear reflects our faith in Teacher and faith in the Fa.
After I lost my job and source of income, I always felt guilty regarding my family. My faith in Teacher and the Fa was then mixed with fear and emotion. I dared not study the Fa and practice the exercises when my family members were at home. The evil forces seemed to reinforce my attachment, and the environment became worse. I was not able to make my family environment better until early this year. When I realized that this state is not one of a cultivator, and that I must correct it, the circumstances immediately changed.
One day when I was meditating, my family scolded and beat me. I firmly brought my legs back to the meditation position after they came apart from being kicked. I told them assertively, "I will practice Falun Gong, no matter what!" Since then, my family has never again interfered with my Fa study and exercises. Teacher has always supported us and protected us, whatever we do. When we let go of the human mindset and conform to the Fa principles at a certain level, Teacher will clean up all interference and persecution factors for us.
The attachment of fear relapsed. When the Nine Commentaries was published, it immediately provoked my fear, a fear that had crept into my mind from the long-term instillation of the Party's culture and propaganda. When I had clarified the truth previously, I never spoke of the Party. When I told people the persecution facts, most people agreed that Dafa was not political and did not get involved in political power. Distributing the Nine Commentaries exposed the nature of the Party outright.
After being brainwashed by the Party for 50 years, intimidated and cowed by extremely cruel ways of killing and horrendous massacres, people had no choice but to agree with it. People agreed that whoever talked about the Chinese Communist Partys problems was involved in politics. They were the ones who also condoned its methods of persecution. Some people were very pleased to receive the Nine Commentaries. Some said that the persecution was even more brutal than what was exposed in the Nine Commentaries.
The sentient beings righteous thoughts encouraged me. I studied Teachers articles including "Turning the Wheel Towards the Human World" over and over. I realized that the enormous current of Fa-rectification was charging forward, and it was urgent to distribute the Nine Commentaries to offer salvation to sentient beings. The Party's evil factors have seized every opportunity to penetrate Chinese people's minds. We must do things rationally and with wisdom, so that people might dare to read the Nine Commentaries and withdraw from the evil Party.
Two years after its publication, it is now much less difficult to spread the Nine Commentaries, clarify the truth, and save sentient beings. More and more people have understood the truth, and the evil factors are becoming less and less. Before the wicked Partys total demise, signs of its decline have become quite visible to all clearheaded people. However, the evil forces are still quite rampant and covertly doing bad things. In other words, circumstances seem to be quite relaxed on the surface, but in actuality, the persecution is never relaxed. Many people are still deceived by the regime's fabricated lies. Some people still refuse to listen to the truth.
Rescuing people is still an urgent matter. During this last phase of Fa-rectification, I still have many human notions and attachments that hinder me from fulfilling my mission of validating Dafa and offering salvation to sentient beings. For instance, I am impatient with those who refuse to listen to the truth. I hesitate to clarify the truth to strangers for fear of being reported. I still have an animosity toward some family members who were disrespectful of Dafa and I am unwilling to clarify the truth to them. I havent reached the realm of grand, all-encompassing compassion as Teacher has taught and exemplified.
Teacher said,
"You already know that the form of a Dafa disciple's cultivation has one cultivate here, in the world, among ordinary people, and that the cultivation directly targets one's mind. All human attachments and notions that interfere with validating the Fa and saving sentient beings must be removed." ("The Closer to the End, the More Diligent You Should Be")
Rescuing Sentient Beings by Cultivating Ourselves Well
Different practitioners have different cultivation states during the Fa-rectification period. Studying the Fa attentively, measuring our thoughts and actions with the Fa, finding those who do not conform to the Fa and correcting them immediatelythis is the divine path Teacher has arranged.
I had begun to recite Zhuan Falun prior to July 20, 1999. Although I was quite busy, I squeezed in every minute to recite the Fa. I felt rich, no matter how hard life was or how tired I was. The happiness of melting myself into the Fa was unparalleled. While reciting the Fa, my character (xinxing) improved. I was able to find any incorrect thoughts on my own and correct them. When I did something wrong, I felt very ashamed. Without solid cultivation I would not have been able to step out to validate Dafa when Dafa was persecuted.
After July 20, 1999, we lost the group environment to study the Fa and practice the exercises. In the terror, people were deceived by the lies that the evildoers had fabricated. My family attributed all the harassment and their financial difficulties to my cultivation, and they sometimes were disrespectful toward Teacher. At first I was able to control my anger and clarified the truth of the persecution of Dafa to them. However, after some time, I became anxious when they were disrespectful toward Dafa. My family and I even had a falling-out and became estranged. I couldnt study the Fa and practice the exercises normally. When I studied the Fa, I couldnt concentrate my mind on the Fa, and I even thought of using ordinary peoples methods to deal with it. I was unconsciously acknowledging the arrangements of the old forces to cultivate in tribulations.
It is difficult for an ordinary person living in this society, someone who values only personal gains, to understand a cultivator. Ordinary people cant understand cultivators. I could have walked a proper path if I had had firm righteous thoughts at that time, and I could have treated those who suffered from confusion and difficulties in the evil persecution with compassion. I also could have eliminated my anxiety; shown tolerance as a practitioner should when they complained, criticized or even insulted and hit me; treated sentient beings without resentment or hatred; put the Fa first; and sent forth righteous thoughts to eliminate the evil factors in the other dimensions that controlled ordinary people. If we had searched inside, the interference and damage caused by the evils taking advantage of our gaps and notions would have been disintegrated. If a cultivator lacks righteous Fa-based thoughts, he behaves in the same way in different environments, be it a detention center, a brainwashing center, in his family setting, or at his workplace.
I recall my personal cultivation when I encountered tribulations in my family. All my family members were Chinese Communist Party members, except my child. They valued personal gains and didnt believe in karmic retribution or gods. When I began to cultivate Dafa, they tried everything to persuade me to give up cultivation.
I followed Teachers instruction,
"You shouldnt hit back when attacked, or talk back when insulted." (Zhuan Falun)
I had a very difficult time at home. My family tried to stop me twice from going to the exercise site. I resisted with an ordinary person's reaction, with resentment. I didnt understand such predestined relationship from the Fa, and I artificially reinforced the interference. Because I didnt act according to the Fa, Teacher gave me hints in two identical dreams in which I was not able to open the lock on my door. Instead, water was leaking from the holes in the lock. This was a sign for me that I had big gaps in my cultivation.
From then on I began to realize my attachments. Just as Teacher said in the section "Being Too Engrossed" in Zhuan Falun, I was too engrossed after learning Dafa, without paying attention to the circumstances. I used Dafa principles to judge ordinary peoples shortcomings. In ordinary society, when others valued personal gains I didnt care for mine, even though they belonged to me. My actions didnt conform to the way of doing things in ordinary society. Ordinary people didnt understand me and even thought there was something wrong with me.
Another one my attachments concerns my wife. She was very strong-minded, hot-tempered, and had a wide circle of relationships. Sometimes she showed no respect for my feelings in front of others. I resented her a lot and even suspected that she was having an affair. The suspicion was a very strong attachment and a test whether I as a practitioner could let go of lust. After police had arrested me twice, I felt that this was also a persecution of my family. When my wife vented her anger about the persecution on me, I confronted her instead of clarifying the truth and patiently exposing the persecution. When she was addicted to playing mahjong, I suspected that she was having an affair. My family was on the verge of falling apart, aided by the persecution by the old forces' dark minions.
A cultivator is not cultivating if he does not search inside for his shortcomings. Neither is he cultivating if he is attached to his human thoughts. A cultivator is not a cultivator if he does not eliminate his attachments. After studying the Fa, I realized that the present environment was formed because of the persecution by the dark minions of the old forces. I didnt handle it as a Dafa practitioner and allowed the old forces to take advantage of my gaps again and again, to arrange so called "tests." I was trapped in it without realizing it.
Teacher mentioned that the old forces had arranged a person's every thought and every act. But I did not understand that deeply. I always thought the old forces had not arranged things so systematically for me. After finding my gaps, I began to dissolve such arrangements with righteous thoughts in Fa study and firmly negated it in my actions. Whenever I had strange, odd thoughts, I eliminated them. Gradually I had fewer odd thoughts, and the family environment gradually became more peaceful.
When I was secretly arrested again for clarifying the truth, I continuously sent forth strong righteous thoughts to eliminate the evil. I asked Teacher to help me to escape so I could rescue sentient beings. My wife looked for me. In a few days she had found the secret brainwashing center that persecutedpractitioners. After a heated confrontation with the brainwashing center staff, she helped rescue me.
As Teacher told us,
"You shouldnt hit back when attacked, or talk back when insulted." (Zhuan Falun, 2003 translation version)
Teacher taught us this as a basic requirement for practitioners. However, I have done poorly in this respect.
Teacher emphasized this issue again in the Fa conference in February this year and made it very clear,
"From this point on, whoever can't take criticism is not being diligent, whoever can't take criticism is not displaying the state of a cultivator, or at least on this issue. (Applause) If someone still can't pass this test, I'll tell you, he is in a very dangerous situation, because for a cultivator this is the most fundamental thing, it's at the top of the list of things to eliminate, and it has to be eliminated. If you don't get rid of it, you won't achieve Consummation. Don't let it become that it's ordinary people doing the work of Dafa disciples. You want to achieve Consummation, not good fortune." ("Teaching the Fa in the City of Los Angeles")
In the past, during the period of personal cultivation, when my family attempted to stop me from cultivating Dafa, I thought they were interfering, and I fought with them. I didnt search inside myself for my character problems and actions that failed to conform to the Fa. I didnt realize that I should pay for my karma in tribulations. I even confronted them or fought with them for the apparent purpose of cultivating Dafa. I intensified their bad feelings toward Dafa when they had already been deceived by the Partys propaganda against Dafa with framed accusations. I feel really sorry about this when I look back. If we dont cultivate based on the Fa, if we dont eliminate our attachments and postnatal notions, we will not be able to do well in validating Dafa and saving sentient beings. We may even push the sentient beings away, let alone create a peaceful environment of righteous cultivation. This is a demonstration of our lack of Fa study, lack of deep understanding of the Fa, and lack of fundamental faith in the Fa.
Due to my circumstance, I didnt hear criticism from fellow practitioners. However, when other people talked about my shortcomings, I couldnt face them with ease, even though I didnt say so. This is a fundamental issue, but I havent eliminated my attachment even now when its coming to the end of Fa-rectification. If I dont get rid of this, I am not being responsible to the Fa, to the sentient beings, or to myself. We already know our cultivation ways and the Fa principles that Teacher taught us. If we dont pay enough attention to this issue, how do we prove we are practitioners?
Teacher said,
"I just said that if you aren't able to suppress it, if you can't look inward and search within yourself when you encounter tensions or conflicts, if you can't change yourself and remove human attachments, then you won't have parts that are fully cultivated and that become divine, and what you do can't be called cultivating. So you need to constantly cultivate the part of you that hasn't been fully cultivated, such that it achieves divinity and is fully cultivated, and you must be strict with yourself--only then is it cultivation. Otherwise, what's the point of cultivation?" ("Teaching the Fa at the Fa Conference at the U.S. Capital")
I must take the Fa as teacher, walk well the final path, and do well what we should do as Fa-rectification period Dafa disciples. I would like to thank the fellow practitioners working on the Clearwisdom/Minghui website for providing such sharing opportunities for us. I would like to use this opportunity to say what I have been longing to say for ten years: Greetings to Master! Dafa disciples in China miss Master!
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Category: Clarifying the Truth