(Clearwisdom.net) Time is flying, and it has already been more than one year since I started practicing Falun Dafa. When I recall this process, I sigh with emotion.
When I was in my childhood, I had a thought for no apparent reason: "Why do human beings have thoughts? Where do thoughts come from?" I would keep thinking until I developed a headache. After I grew up, all kinds of troubles and disputes about work, marriage, and children made me feel bitter toward the world. When I was very young, I liked reading very much, especially the books about contemplation and spirit. I hoped I could understand the purpose of life, however, I found nothing. I continued to look in religion, but I still couldn't find the answer even though I felt something in religion was right.
In May 2005, I began to practice Falun Dafa, and I was fascinated when I read the Dafa books. I was amazed at Dafa's immensity and profundity, and my body and mentality underwent changes as I continued reading the books eagerly. After cultivating Dafa for six months, one day I suddenly noticed that my usual empty feeling was gone. To my surprise, I realized I had not felt perplexed in a long time. Instead, I was full of inner calm and peace.
Through various supernatural feelings and the elevation of my thoughts, I came to understand that actually I had been waiting and looking for Dafa all along. At that moment, I was extremely excited, and I felt that I was so lucky that I hadn't gone astray. At the same time, I understood why some kind of power was leading me to search for something. In fact, it came from deep in my heart, and my knowing side was eager to obtain Dafa.
Everyone has a predestined relationship with Dafa. When I read a fellow practitioner's article on the Internet about predestined relationships with Master, I was deeply moved. Recalling my experience of obtaining Dafa, although it was very common, it was full of Master's merciful salvation. I truly realized that Dafa disciples are beings that have come for the Fa.
In 1997, my younger sister recommended Dafa to me, and I then decided to read Zhuan Falun. However, I had so many human notions, and also the Communist Party's anti-theistic education hindered me severely. As a result, I always weighed Master's teachings with human notions, and I thus felt it was difficult to understand and accept. In addition, I would become drowsy whenever I began to read the Fa; therefore, I read several pages and then stopped. However, I was very interested in cultivation, so I found the practice site in the park and saw so many people practicing. To my surprise, there were many young practitioners. I was attracted by the solemn and harmonious scene and went to the park to learn the practice in the morning for several days. Later, I felt it was too hard for me and ended up with nothing definite. Now I am very regretful. At that time I was about twenty and full of idealism, but I was pursuing the good life. Because of my attachments, I was lost in life. During the following years, I pursued the good life: work, love, and marriage. However, things went contrary to my wishes. I ran into all kinds of pressure and trouble and felt pain and bitterness, and I became very irritable. Although I felt I was in an incorrect state, I couldn't change it.
At that time, my younger sister graduated and came to a southern city to work. I was then able to visit her more often. I found that her optimistic and peaceful heart could calm my bitter heart, which made me enjoy visiting her. Once when I had nothing to do while at her home, I told her that I wanted to read. She only had Dafa books. I read Master's overseas teachings, but I didn't like reading Zhuan Falun. As I read I thought it was very inconceivable and difficult to understand, but at the same time I felt that Master's words were right. I began to enjoy reading Master's teachings. I chose the parts that I was interested in and just regarded them as interesting stories to read.
Another time I visited my sister for several days. When I decided to return home, a thought enetered my mind: "Bring Zhuan Falun home." That thought seemed very strange to me at the time, but now I understand that it was because Master was leading me to obtain the Fa. When I read Zhuan Falun again, my thoughts seemed to be unlocked. I was able to enlighten and then was eager to read Master's other teachings. My mindset had changed unconsciously. As I read the Fa more and more, I had an ideat: "I wanted to practice Dafa."
Because of this thought, Master opened my celestial eye for me, which was just like it is stated in the book, and also gave me a Law Wheel. My body experienced changes one after another, and I felt very light when I walked. Even though I didn't learn the exercise movements, Master gave me all he could give me.
Cultivation is very serious, and one cannot be of two minds. When I began to start practicing, I ran into all kinds of resistance. I either looked for unrighteous qigong books to read or read the books slandering Master. In fact, I clearly knew that it was not right. However, I still indulged my attachment of curiosity. After reading these books, I often had doubts and repulsion, and, as a result, I could not read the Fa any more. I would feel very helpless and would be interfered with for one day. The next morning when I got up, I found that I didn't have so many bad thoughts. Subsequently, I could read the Fa again. At that time, I didn't know about thought karma, and just felt it strange. Later, I understood that it was Master who helped me eliminate the thought karma.
In my initial period of cultivation, I felt the supernatural power of Dafa continuously. One time, I was anxious about something, but Master helped me solve this problem. I was very grateful, and I truly felt that Master was watching over me. There were many such experiences. Sometimes I thought that my enlightenment quality was not good. If Master hadn't saved me mercifully, I would lose this opportunity. I truly felt that Master doesn't want to lose anyone who has a predestined relationship with Dafa. Before I obtained the Fa, Master was protecting me. He uses all kinds of methods to enable the disciples who are lost to obtain the Fa. After I decided to become a practitioner, Master was concerned about my diligence and prevented me from going astray.
I often read the articles on the Internet that mention that Master exhausts his efforts for disciples. I really feel this is true. We came to this dirty world filled with karma during the process of transmigration. In addition, our human notions and selfishness have already concealed our attachments. Facing these kinds of dirty beings, Master has been determinedly saving us. Master taught us the Fa and enlightened us and devoted a lot of effort to our progress. When I read the Fa calmly, I can feel Master's mercy and tolerance. Master is just like a father who devotes all his energy to his children and leads us forward.
Now I am doing the three things. When fellow practitioners first suggested that I send forth righteous thoughts, I had doubts about my ability. However, I still persisted in doing it. At the beginning of sending forth righteous thoughts, I met a lot of interference, such as car sounds, loud music, noises, and other distractions that made me not pay attention to sending forth righteous thoughts. Twice when I put my legs into the lotus position, I felt I was being choked and as a result, I could only think about putting my legs down quickly. Later I came to understand that the evil is very afraid of our sending forth righteous thoughts. When I began to eliminate the evil with more resolve, my palm felt hot and the energy was very strong. When I did Dafa work I attached importance to sending forth righteous thoughts. Sometimes I would send forth a righteous thought for something in particular, and I thus strengthened my confidence and encouraged myself. The effect was very obvious.
When I realized my responsibility as a Dafa disciple, I came to understand that I should clarify the truth broadly. I mainly distributed truth-clarification materials. When I began to do this, my heart was full of agitation and I trembled, but I became more and more peaceful after doing it several times. Because I was busy in my work, I would put some truth-clarifying materials in my bag and distribute them when I was running errands.
As I became involved with Dafa, I became more and more aware of the righteous vigor that Dafa gave me: it was a pure mind and the righteous vigor emitted from the inside to the outside. I often had the feeling of being open and aboveboard, upright and righteous. I liked reciting Master's teaching,
"Indestructible righteous faith in the cosmos's Truth forms benevolent Dafa disciples' rock-solid, Diamond-Like Bodies, it frightens all evil, and the light of Truth it emanates makes the unrighteous elements in all beings' thoughts disintegrate. However strong the righteous thoughts are, that's how great the power is." ("Also in a Few Words" from Essentials for Further Advancement II)
What a dignified and majestically imposing manner! This teaching gave me a lot of power. I feel deeply that the beings that Dafa creates should be like this--we should be this kind of being.
Recalling my short cultivation path of only more than one year, I have so many feelings. When I was passing through tribulations and letting go of my attachments, I felt very bitter. However, when I successfully passed the tribulation, the feeling of goodness as I elevated my thoughts could not be expressed in words. I realized that it is Master who helps me strive forward.
Heshi! Thank you, Master, and salutations to my respectful fellow practitioners. I am proud of being Master's disciple and I am happy to be one with my fellow practitioners.
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