(Clearwisdom.net) I began to practice Falun Gong in March 2006. When I read experience sharing articles on the Clearwisdom website like, "Recalling Teacher's Compassion" and other articles by veteran practitioners, I cannot stop tears from falling down my face. I am moved by Teacher's mighty compassion and great suffering for us. I feel fortunate that we have this great opportunity to follow Teacher and cultivate ourselves.
Fellow practitioners' experience sharing articles have touched me and helped me decide to write down my own cultivation experiences to share with others. Also, after reading "Cultivation paths are different, yet all are within Dafa" from "No Obstacles" of Hong Yin II, I let go of my hesitation to write an experience sharing article.
1. Fortunate to become a Falun Gong practitioner
Before the persecution of Falun Gong began on July 20, 1999, I often saw practitioners doing the exercises together on my way back home from work. At that time, I thought of introducing Falun Gong to my father as his health was very poor. However, because I had not read any Dafa books before, I did not do it.
In 2001, I was arranged to apply for membership with the Chinese Communist Party (CCP). At that time, everyone had to make a public statement opposing Falun Gong. When I was filling out my application, I thought, "Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good; why would the CCP claim it is bad?" This may have been my predestined relationship with Falun Dafa. In 2006, I published a statement withdrawing from the CCP on The Epoch Times Chinese website.
In March and April 2006, I read many articles about prehistoric civilizations on the internal website of our company. I have always been interested in prehistorical things, so I went and discussed them with my mother-in-law, who practices Falun Dafa. She was surprised and went and got the book, "Zhuan Falun," for me. When I opened the book and saw Teacher's picture, I felt his emanated kindness and it was as though I had met Teacher before. Later, when I read articles by other practitioners, I learned that many of us have this similar feeling. It is just like what Teacher said,
"Predestined ties of countless lifetimes
Each has Dafa as its guiding thread."("The Difficult Path to Godhood", Hong Yin II)
Now I understand it was Teacher who arranged everything.
At my mother-in-law's, I was only able to read a little bit of Zhuan Falun before I had to leave. I was amazed at Teacher's boundless knowledge and felt shocked that Teacher knows so much. Now I understand Teacher knows everything. Although I had a copy of China Falun Gong at home, I did not read it because I was afraid of being persecuted by the CCP. However, after I got home from my mother-in-law's that day, I started reading China Falun Gong and finished it that same night. The principles in the book deeply touched me. I realized how different the teachings are compared to the CCP's propaganda. A few days later, I went to my mother-in-law's house again and asked to borrow a copy of Zhuan Falun. Once at home, I read the book immediately and finished it within a few days. I realized that my thinking and perspective on life changed tremendously after I had finished reading the book. All that Teacher expounds about in Zhuan Falun is how to cultivate, be a good person, and to look inward when faced with conflicts. Teacher also clearly discusses the issue of killing, "... as long as it is an upright cultivation practice, it will consider this issue very absolute and prohibit killing," (Lecture Seven of Zhuan Falun, 2000 edition). He also teaches that suicide is sinful. Therefore, a true Falun Gong practitioner would never set themselves on fire as the CCP claimed in the staged 2001 Tiananmen Square self-immolation incident that it used to incite fear and hatred about Falun Gong in the Chinese people.
After reading Zhuan Falun, many of my bad thoughts were eliminated immediately. During that period, I experienced several incredible things. One night, as I was falling asleep, I heard the sound of ancient Chinese instruments playing. Another time was on May 13, 2006, after I had finished reading Teacher's lectures in 1999 and Essentials for Further Advancement. As I was about to fall asleep, I felt my chest expending bigger and bigger. For unknown reasons, I felt a little afraid and called out to Teacher for help. Now I realized that Teacher was expanding my capacity.
On July 25, 2006, when I read the first lecture of Zhuan Falun to my five-year-old son, he suddenly said, "Grandpa, I'm coming." My son calls Teacher, "Grandpa." I'm often surprised by what my son says sometimes. Once I asked my son, "Son, do you know why dad and mom loves you so much?" While playing, he casually replied, "It is because of your sentimentality!" I feel very fortunate that my son and I can become one of Teacher's disciples.
In the process of continuously studying the Fa, I came to understood the true purpose of being human, that is, returning to one's true self. No matter how negative a person is, once he/she is determined to cultivate in Falun Dafa, that person can return to their true, divine self. My xinxing also improved tremendously. Whenever I come across a conflict, I no longer try to find others' problems so that I can blame them, but I now look inward first to see what I did wrong. One time this year, when my son and I had almost reached the sidewalk on the other side of the street we were crossing, a motorcyclist suddenly screamed past us. The motorcycle scratched and ruined the bag in my hand and my son's ice-cream fell to the street. The female motorcyclist stopped her motorcycle about eight meters away from us while complaining that we should have watched where we were going. I didn't say a word when she was complaining. Later I asked my son, "Why didn't mom argue with that lady?" He replied,"Because you study Grandpa's teaching." Indeed, if I didn't practice Falun Gong, I would have been just like the driver and started a fight with her.
After reading Teacher's Fa, whenever I come across a conflict, my first thought is that I'm a Falun Gong practitioner and I should not behave like an everyday person. Although the conflicts I encounter are nothing compared to the examples Teacher mentioned in Zhuan Falun, they still give me a good opportunity to improve my xinxing. Teacher mentions that anything we come across in cultivation is a good thing. I behave myself according to the Fa in my everyday life. Although I am still far from the standard of a Fa-Rectification Dafa practitioner, I feel I am continuously improving.
Thank you Teacher for giving me the opportunity to become your student.
2. Teacher's mighty compassion towards practitioners
In the beginning of my cultivation, I only read the Fa and improved my xinxing, but rarely did I do the exercises. I once read an article about a new practitioner who read Zhuan Falun more than 20 times and all of Teacher's lectures three or four times in the six months of that practitioner's cultivation. However, I had studied the Fa much longer than half a year, but I studied less than this new practitioner. I have only read Zhuan Falun twice to my son. I realized that I had fallen short in cultivation and needed to catch up and study the Fa more diligently.
I would like to share my experience about doing the exercises and how Teacher strengthened me. Before April 25, 2007, I rarely did the exercises. About four months after I first began cultivating Falun Gong, I finally learned how to do the first and third exercises in July 2006. By October of 2006, I learned how to do the four standing exercises. The first time I did the second exercise, I felt very hot and my whole body was sweating, even the back of hands. It was challenging for me to finish the second exercise, but I persisted and finished it. At that time, I only did the first four exercises twice a week. After studying the Fa, I realized that I should do the five sets of exercises every day. During this period, I also read Teacher's lectures. I decided to eliminate my attachment to comfort and laziness. Normally, I can do the fifth meditation exercise in the double-lotus position for thirty minutes, but rarely could I do it for the whole hour. I set a goal to be able to do the fifth exercise for one hour by April. By the end of March this year, I was able to do the whole hour of the fifth exercise.
On the night of April 24, I read an article on Clearwisdom.net about practitioners in mainland China doing exercises together every morning at 3:50 a.m. Afterwards, I decided I wanted to do the exercises with my fellow practitioners the next morning. When the alarm clock went off the next morning, I was able to get up and didn't feel sleepy like I normally did. Immediately after getting up, I sent forth righteous thoughts. My mind was calmer than usual. I didn't even feel as much pain as I normally did when doing the sitting meditation in double-lotus position for one hour. I deeply realized the power of group exercise.
I hope those practitioners who haven't participated in group exercise start to do so. Practitioners in China practicing together is another step forward in the Fa-rectification arranged by Teacher. More practitioners participating in the group exercise will add more energy into the field. In such a strong field, when we send forth righteous thoughts at 6:00 a.m., we will be able to more throughly clear out the evil factors. It is also a wonderful opportunity for those practitioners who are too busy to exercise.
3. Trying to do the three things well and catch up with the Fa-rectification
I have practiced Falun Gong for over a year now. Teacher repeatedly mentions in his lectures that we should study the Fa more. I have a full-time job, so the times that I can study the Fa are early morning and late evening. I take the opportunity to recite the Fa when I take my son to or from school. Sometimes I recite Teacher's poems together with my son. Of course, when compared to those practitioners who can recite all of Zhuan Falun, I fall short. However, I never stop studying the Fa. Now I can follow Teacher's teaching and try my best to do the three things well. Every day, I send forth righteous thoughts seven times. Sometimes after having gone to sleep for a while, I often wake up and seem to still be in the state of sending righteous thoughts, so I will continue to send forth righteous thoughts.
When I go out to distribute truth materials, I can deeply understand the meaning of what Teacher says, "Cultivation depends on one's own efforts, while the transformation of gong is done by one's master." (Lecture One, Zhuan Falun, 2000 version) When I want to pass out some truth-clarification materials, with that simple thought, Teacher arranges the environment for me. It is very common that all of sudden, people would leave except for the person who I should clarify the truth to. This way, I can clarify the truth in a very easy environment. There have also been times that I didn't do well. I once saw a person I knew and I thought of giving him a copy of truth-clarification materials. With this thought, he suddenly walked up to me. Although there were many people walking by, no one bothered us. However, as I was talking with him, I began to struggle with myself. I thought that since he knew me well, he would know that I was a practitioner if I gave him truth materials, and thus I would be known. With this attachment to fear, I didn't clarify the truth to him, neither did I give him any truth-clarification materials. Teacher arranged this person for me to save him, but I failed to do what I should do.
Although sometimes I do not do well in clarifying the truth or my strong attachments surfaced, I'm not moved, but rather, more determined to follow Teacher and Dafa. During the process, I have cultivated myself and eliminated various attachments.
On April 19, 2007, my sister-in-law asked me to help her. To best utilize this opportunity, my son and I distributed truth materials on our way to my sister-in-law's home. My son helped by watching the environment - whenever people passed by, he would sing and dance as a way of letting me know. We cooperated very well with each other. After we finished distributing truth-clarification materials, we arrived at my sister-in-law's and clarified the truth to her. At about 11 p.m., on our way back home, the car suddenly died as we were waiting for the light to turn green. I tried to restart the car, but couldn't. A taxi driver behind us told me that my car was leaking oil. This really implied that I had gaps in cultivation. I then recited Lunyu twice and sent forth righteous thoughts in the car, but I didn't immediately look inward. I thought it had to be the old forces interfering with me. Teacher taught us that we should look inward first even when the old forces interfere with us. Although I had sent forth righteous thoughts to clear the field, I still couldn't start my car. Only then did I start to look inward and found the problem. When I was clarifying the truth about Falun Gong, I said something inappropriate, and thus I failed to cultivate my speech. When I realized this, my car started immediately.
Before I could park my car in the parking lot at home, the car died on me again. As a result, we had to push it to the parking lot. Afterwards, my husband asked if a lot of oil had leaked. At that moment, I replied that it had to leak a lot. The next morning when I was doing the exercises, I realized that I didn't just have a few gaps in cultivation, but many of them. Then I looked inward to find other attachments that I hadn't realized yesterday. I indeed found another one. Whenever we discussed how to clarify the truth to my father-in-law, I said that it was my mother-in-law's job and that I would not do it. As I was saying this, I already felt something was wrong, but I didn't try to find out what it was. Teacher has come to Earth to teach the Fa, save all sentient beings and rectify the whole universe. As a particle of Dafa, how could I have the thought that saving a sentient being is not my responsibility. Isn't this selfish? We are suppose to cultivate ourselves to become selfless enlightened beings, so do I meet the standard? Isn't this a big gap? Isn't this a fundamental attachment?
My sister-in-law has opposed Dafa for a long time. Although we have clarified the truth to her many times, she still refuses to withdraw from the CCP. I feel that what I say to her cannot touch her heart. Teacher told us that Falun Dafa practitioners have energy. When I think that my truth clarification effort can't touch her, doesn't this thought enforce the CCP's evil specter? With this wrong notion in my mind, how could she withdraw from the CCP. Recently, I would prepare ahead of time before clarifying the truth to her. I took the opportunity to go to her office and home. While we talk about things she needs help with, I would send forth righteous thoughts to clear out all the evil beings and rotten demons in her environment. Then I would give her truth-clarification materials to read. While she was reading the them, I would ask Teacher to help let her read through the materials. Later, I gave her a copy of Nine Commentaries On the Communist Party and read some parts together with her. On April 22, when I met with her again, she agreed to withdraw from the CCP.
As for my husband, it was very hard to clarify the truth to him. Teacher has talked about how to clarify the truth to family members, but I still did it poorly. My husband was deeply poisoned by the CCP because of his profession. He opposed my practicing Falun Gong. He was even involved in persecuting Falun Gong to some degree. I want to save him and let him know the truth. At the beginning, whenever I brought up anything related to Falun Gong, he would get angry. Still, I followed what Teacher said, "As a practitioner, the first thing you should be able to do is to not fight back when you are beaten or sworn at--you must be tolerant."(Lecture Nine, Zhuan Falun, 2000 version) Once when he drank too much, he started to push me and choke my neck with both of his hands while asking me to give up practicing Falun Gong. This time, I didn't endure it like I did before because I thought this is not simply paying off karma, but a form of persecution. With his hands around my neck, I started sending forth righteous thoughts to clear the evil factors and old forces behind him. I also told him, "You push me harder, I will be more determined to practice Falun Gong." After hearing my response, he pushed me onto the bed and started beating me. But I didn't feel any pain.
The next day, I saw a message on his cell phone from another woman. I also saw him chatting on line with other women. In trying to deal with his relationships with other women, I didn't keep a quiet heart or practice compassion. I confronted him directly about it. I realized I needed to improve my xinxing continuously to reach the standard of a true Dafa practitioner.
The more I read the Fa, the more urgent I feel it is to save sentient beings. When I clarify the truth to my husband, he would not listen to me, but instead threatened to take away my Dafa books and said disrespectful things about Teacher. I was very upset and cried. However, I shouldn't stop clarifying the truth to others because I am having difficulty in clarifying the truth to my husband. I continued to send forth righteous thoughts, distribute truth materials, and do my best to cultivate away my human attachments.
Although I haven't helped many people withdraw from the CCP, I will continue my effort. Recently, my husband has changed slightly. Whenever my mother-in-law gets a chance, she will continuously clarify the truth to him. Sometimes, he listens to me talking about Teacher and Dafa. However, he is still not receptive whenever I try to clarify the truth to him and he refuses to watch truth clarification VCDs. No matter, I won't give up. I'm studying the Fa more diligently.
Whenever I go back to my hometown, I would clarify the truth to my family and relatives. Now my sister and sister-in-law are reading Zhuan Falun. My mother is listening to the Fa Teaching the Fa in Guangzhou City. The last time I went back to my hometown, my sister had just finished reading Zhuan Falun. She shared a story with me. During the harvest season, someone from her village left things on the road and blocked the traffic. As a result, a farm truck drove through her wheat field. She told me that she would not have taken it lightly if she hadn't read Zhuan Falun. She would have asked for payment for the damage. Now that she is cultivating, she knows that she should take personal benefits lightly, so she didn't say anything.
As a particle of Dafa, I haven't done enough. I will be more diligent with studying the Fa and cultivating myself, such as cultivating away my attachments to ease, desires, and other attachments. I will do the three things well, so as to not disappoint Teacher.
Heshi to our compassionate Teacher. I will do well.
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