(Clearwisdom.net) My path of validating the Fa and saving sentient beings has not always been smooth. I know now that bumps happened because I lacked a good understanding of the Fa, and I was not diligent in my cultivation. Therefore, I suffered a number of tribulations that could have been avoided. I want to share my experience in validating the Fa during the time I was not quite up to par in the hopes that fellow practitioners can learn from my shortcomings.
Tribulations Because of Attachments
Teacher said:
"A cultivator has no role models. The path each person is to take is different, because each person's foundation is different, the sizes of their various attachments are different, the characteristics of their beings are different, their jobs among everyday people are different, their family environments are different, and so on. These factors determine that each person's path of cultivation is different, that how they get rid of their attachments is different, and that the sizes of their tests are different. Therefore, amidst the manifestations of things it's very hard to find a path that others have made, and it's even less possible for a person to get a ride down one." ("Path")
Being employed in the computer field for quite some time, I became deeply attached to computers. Every time I used a computer, I was just as attached as ordinary people. I browsed certain websites and played with my cell phone for hours. These activities interfered with my Fa-study and truth-clarification work. Especially when validating the Fa, since what I was doing was technical work, and I hadn't quite let go of my attachments, I again got involved in the aforementioned activities. Recently, I could not help myself and got caught up in computer activities. Therefore, I didn't meet the requirements of Dafa as a Fa-rectification period Dafa disciple. The consequences for not following Dafa are very grave and the losses are great.
Last August, I listened to a practitioner from the Qingxin Forum, who suggested that I install a DCPP. This would save time in the long run as it would no longer necessitate wiping the system trail for security purposes. Also, another practitioner told me that he installed DCPP and that it worked well. I thought his computer skills were average, so if he was able to install the DCPP successfully, so could I! Therefore, I decided to install the DCPP. The instructions were very long and I felt it was too much of a bother to read them. I believed that as long as I had a quick read, it would do. I began to install the system after glancing at the instructions. When the computer was rebooting, I heard a "chuck, chuck" sound from the computer and I thought, "Oh my, what's going on?" (At that time, my thought was not right. Good or evil comes from a person's spontaneous thought. This unrighteous thought directly led to a serious consequence.) After I turned off the computer, my hard drive was out of commission. I realized that the hard drive no longer worked and it couldn't boot up.
I completely forgot that I was a practitioner. I didn't look within to rectify myself. I tried to format the C drive so that I could reinstall the system, exactly what a non-practitioner would do. Naturally, I couldn't format it or install the system. I just couldn't believe that I couldn't fix it, so I kept trying until midnight - without success. My wife, also a practitioner, asked me what was going on. I was afraid for her to find out that the hard drive was broken, as I was sure that she would blame me. Therefore, I just said, "No big deal, it's going to be alright." My wife was eager to read the Minghui website. I told her that the drive was broken, but that we could get a new one free of charge, as it was within the warranty period. I thought I had made a copy of the "Minghui Daily" on another disk, so I gave it to her. But she said in a very upset tone that she couldn't find the file. I couldn't find it either. Then, I came down with a terrible headache. I remembered that I had made a copy, how come it disappeared? My wife pointed her finger at me, saying that I lost the truth-clarification materials. She was so upset that she left the house for a while and we didn't talk to each other for a few days.
I was at my wit's end. I hoped that I could calm down and study the Fa. I tried to look for the reason for what happened. Before installing the DCPP, I believed that I was good concerning technical matters. I thought that this was a huge project that could not be done by my wife. I think now that I had an attachment to showing off and an attachment to self. I didn't use Teacher's Fa to measure myself, which made the loss even worse.
Teacher said:
"When you encounter something, the best approach is not to charge forward and contend with others, push your way to the front, and rush forward to chase down the solution. Let go of your attachment, take a step back, and then resolve it. (Applause) If whenever something happens you instantly jump into who's right, whose problem it is, and how you have done, then while on the surface it looks like you are resolving the conflict or tension, in reality that's not the case at all. On the surface it looks plenty rational, but in reality that's not rational at all. You haven't taken a step back and fully cast off your attachment, and then thought the issue over. Only after a person calmly and peacefully withdraws from a conflict and then looks at it can he truly resolve it." (Teaching the Fa at the Fa Conference at the U.S. Capital")
After reading Teacher's words, I felt as if I was hit on the head. I realized that if I had followed Teacher's Fa and taken a step back, I would not have experienced such consequences. I would have been able to copy all the data on the hard drive, even if the hard drive was broken. It was also a great loss because I did not follow the universal principals. I lost so many truth-clarification materials, which would affect so many people's chances of salvation. I have created so much karma and it pains my heart. Therefore, I began to look deep within to find my attachments.
I realized that I had many attachments. I had thought that installing the DCPP was for my wife's safety when she browsed the Internet. But why did I find myself in such a dilemma? Now, I realized that I was attached to sentimentality, attached to showing off in front of her and attached to self. I thought, "Other practitioners have installed the DCPP." Instead of feeling happy for others, I thought if somebody else could do it, then I could do it. This is also a manifestation of jealousy. When the hard drive didn't work, I didn't back up one step to look within. Instead, I became agitated. I wanted to get the problem fixed quickly. When my wife asked me about it, I didn't answer truthfully, but lied and said that it was okay. My attachment to not losing face and to fame manifested. Also, lying is a behavior that goes against the characteristic of the universe, "Truthfulness, Compassion, Forbearance." I also have the attachment of thinking I am good with technical things. There is the attachment to curiosity and the attachment of wanting to shirk responsibility for my actions. When I ran into a conflict, I didn't take a step back. Instead, I felt that what was happening was unfair. This was not within the Fa and therefore resulted in irretrievable losses.
Unexpectedly, when installing the DCPP, I demonstrated many human attachments, including attachments to sentimentality, showing-off, fame, jealousy and dishonesty. With so many attachments, how can I do such a sacred thing as Fa-rectification well?
I hope that practitioners involved in the technical aspects of Fa-rectification work will do everything within the Fa, and not be attached to ordinary people skills. We need to walk our paths well.
Since that incident I have read many experience sharing articles on Minghui, including the article, "Cultivate Ourselves First Before Fixing The Machine." The article describes fellow practitioners sending forth righteous thoughts when encountering trouble browsing the Internet. Actually I do the same. Teacher said:
"in the cosmos of the past, this environment--that is, these dimensions where the Three Realms now exist--was inhabited by a variety of lowly creatures, including what we refer to today as aliens. They are in fact lowly creatures that have gained a certain technological expertise." ("Teaching the Fa in Canada, 2006")
Every time in the past when I read this paragraph, I felt as if I was hit by cold water. Now I have awakened to it. I now understand that if we only understand the techniques without attaching any importance to elevating xinxing, wouldn't we be just like low-level creatures? Can we truly be responsible toward saving sentient beings?
In the past, I took computer techniques to be no more than techniques. I thought that if computers broke, we would have to fix them. It didn't occur to me that it had anything to do with Falun Dafa and sending forth righteous thoughts? No matter how strongly we send forth righteous thoughts, it would not be fixed. Even though I read many fellow practitioners' articles, the message didn't sink in. Because of this incident, I truly enlightened concerning this issue. It doesn't matter what we do to validate the Fa, it is built on the same premise. We should keep a calm and peaceful heart. If we run into a problem, we should look within. Even if we don't find any omissions in our xinxing, we probably fall short in our behavior, method, and so on. We should improve. We shouldn't shirk our responsibilities by getting attached to ourselves. We should treat the Fa as teacher.
Enlightening on the Issue of "Paying Attention to Safety"
For a long time, when doing things to validate Dafa, many fellow practitioners didn't pay attention to their own safety, let alone others' safety. There are many articles on this subject on Minghui, such as the casual misplacement of telephone numbers and talking about Dafa-related things over the phone. When CCP minions monitored the individuals, material production centers were destroyed and fellow practitioners were arrested. This resulted in huge losses to validating the Fa. Yet, practitioners still didn't pay attention. I came to enlighten that this was a manifestation of lacking understanding on the Fa and also indulging our attachments.
One time, when I was reading Zhuan Falun, I stopped on the words: "Transcending the Five Elements and the Three Realms." Teacher enlightened me all of a sudden and I came to understand that a Buddha body which has transcended the five elements may still fracture when a car hits it, or will still bleed if cut by a knife, because it is still bound by the elements in this dimension. But, this is even more so with practitioners who still have human attachments. When we don't comply with the requirements of Dafa at this level, we will be bound to this dimension automatically. Teacher asks us to send forth righteous thoughts, which is to make use of our divine power to subdue evils at every dimension, including the human level.
How come there are so many practitioners with problems? It was because either their xinxing or actions fall short because they are bound by their notions to human level principles. Practitioners who are monitored are impeded in validating the Fa. We should not only assimilate to Dafa and comply with the standards of Dafa at different levels, we also need to harmonize the Fa at the human level. Only by following what Teacher said about conforming as much as possible to the way of ordinary society are we no longer bound by the Fa at the human level. Only then can we walk our last leg of the cultivation path without interruption.
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Category: Improving Oneself
