(Clearwisdom.net) I used to suffer from poor memory and I forgot things easily. I work at a laboratory and I often became confused if I had to handle more than two items in an examination. My supervisor regularly returned my reports for correction. Fortunately, since I began practicing Falun Dafa, things have changed for the better. Now I am able to handle ten items in an examination without difficulties, and in turn, I have become the worker whom my supervisor relies on the most.
Reading articles about memorizing Zhuan Falun on the Minghui website, I said to myself, "It would be a pity if I did not memorize such a good book." However, I was afraid that I was incapable of memorizing the whole book. Then I realized that my lack of confidence was because I did not have enough faith in the power of Fa and Master. If fellow practitioners could do it, why couldn't I?
I started to memorize Zhuan Falun and realized it was easier said than done. In the beginning, my thought karma and external interferences distracted me when I was trying to memorize and it was hard to remember even a short paragraph. As I could not continue, I became anxious and upset and even made some trouble for my family. So when I went out to distribute truth clarification materials, my mindset was not righteous enough, and I was abducted and detained at a detention center for 15 days.
After this, I realized that Dafa cultivation is very serious. Without Master's protection, I would not have been able to pass the trial. I identified the omissions in my cultivation state: my mind was unable to concentrate on studying the Fa; I did not memorize the Fa with all my heart but like ordinary people studied some theory; I argued with ordinary people instead of looking within and cultivating myself; I complained about others and considered myself better than them; and I thought I was good according to ordinary people's standards. Now when I look at myself, I find myself not like a Dafa practitioner at all. Only through studying the Fa and looking within, can I be a true cultivator. I must start to devote myself to memorizing the Fa.
However, I was really slow. It took me two or three hours to memorize one paragraph. Sometimes I lost confidence and wanted to stop. Then I remembered what fellow practitioners told me about how to persist and that Master said in Zhuan Falun, "When it's impossible to do, you can do it." I felt the encouragement and believed that I could do it. I have now recited Zhuan Falun six times. I feel I am living in the light of the magnificent Fa.
Memorizing Zhuan Falun helped me upgrade my xinxing. There were three practitioners in our Fa study group and one of us used to complain about his daughter-in-law. Another practitioner and I said to him, "Master told us, 'cultivators have no enemies' (Turning the Wheel towards the Human World). How can you cultivate with your attachment of complaining about others? You need to look within yourself." After saying this, I thought: while telling the fellow practitioner to look within, I should look within myself, too. It was not by chance that I encounter this. Master said,
"When any conflict arises or anything happens, I've told you that not only should the two parties in the conflict look for reasons on their part, even any third party should think about himself - why are you the one who observed it?" (Teaching the Fa at the 2004 Chicago Conference)
When I looked closely inside myself, I noticed that I also had the attachment of complaining about others: so-and-so was not good, so-and-so only did superficial work, and I was mad at someone who did things in a different way from mine; I also had the heart of jealousy and competition, as well as the attachment of sentimentality and lust. When I realized that I still had so many attachments, I made up my mind to get rid of them because they did not belong to the true me and I had attained them from the secular world. Thanks to my memorizing the Fa, I was able to identify my attachments and in turn, eliminate them.
December 3, 2009
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Category: Improving Oneself
