(Minghui.org) I was born into a family of cadres (government employees), spent my working life in an office, and am now retired. Throughout these years, my life had been fairly comfortable and without hardship.
I walked into Dafa cultivation in 2004. In the years since, I passed out truth-clarification materials and posted banners in the surrounding countryside, but I did not encounter any painful obstacles. Life was very calm.
Recently, I went with fellow practitioners to establish Fa-study sites, riding electric bicycles back and forth. The locations ranged between 15 and 50 miles away from my home. For example, we went to the farthest location once a week. As the number of practitioners stepping forward increased, we split the group into two, based on gender. For a period of time, we attended both meetings every week, with one day in between. Now the practitioners there are very dedicated: they clarify the truth, help people quit the Chinese Communist Party (CCP), distribute truth-clarification materials, and make and post banners. Practitioners conducting business at the market distribute materials and CDs face-to-face. The majority of practitioners have caught up, so now we go there less frequently—just once a week to share experiences. During this process, I lost many human attachments, primarily the attachment to comfort.
Because we traveled long distances, I often departed right after eating lunch at 11 a.m. Other times, I had to wait until after sending righteous thoughts to meet with another practitioner before setting off. Sometimes, we would stop on the way to hand out truth-clarification materials and post banners. When we came across predestined people, we would clarify the truth to them and encourage them to quit the CCP. By the time we reached the Fa-study site 50 miles away, it was already 2 or 3 p.m. After studying the Fa or sharing experiences with practitioners there, we would set off for home, sometimes arriving as late as 8:30 p.m. We rarely had time to rest during the week and felt that the work, as well as cultivation, was very tiring.
At one point, I started having problems with my bike and could not travel more than 30 miles. I wanted to replace the battery, but my family, who are all non-practitioners, were unwilling to do so and said, “You only ride around town and never go far, so why do you have to replace the battery?” I thought that, since it was only about 40 miles to the destination, I just had to charge it after arriving and should be able to make it back. But the battery died 15 miles from our destination. That day it was very hot and humid, and I had to pedal the rest of the way. Without power, the electric bike was heavy and slow. I got hot, tired, and sweaty. I pedaled as long as I could, until my strength was completely sapped. Feeling faint, I told my fellow practitioners to go on without me. Eventually, I reached the Fa-study site.
Another time when returning from the same Fa-study location, I was 10 miles from home when there was a torrential rain. The sun had set before 7 p.m., and it was pitch-black. I turned on my bike's headlight but still could not see anything in front of me. The intense downpour was accompanied by a ferocious wind. If I rode slowly, I felt as if the wind was blowing me backwards. If I sped up, I couldn't open my eyes because of the rain. After a difficult time, I reached home. Despite having worn a raincoat, I was completely soaked.
During this time, I traveled day after day and felt that doing this was very hard and unnecessary. I pondered staying at home like the practitioners in the city, printing and passing out truth-clarification materials or posting banners instead. I wanted to buy a printer to produce materials and banners that the remote Fa-study sites needed. When I brought up this idea among my fellow practitioners, they said that I should not stay and print materials, a task that anyone could do. Because establishing Fa-study locations was more difficult, they concluded that I should continue that task and offered to give me as many materials as I needed.
But I still wanted to print truth-clarification materials and be more comfortable. Once, while burning incense for Master, I thought, “Where have I not done enough? Master, please enlighten me! At that moment, I remembered the material production issue again. I thought, “What made me want to make truth-clarification materials in the first place? Was it for the Fa? Was it because materials were in short supply?” When I looked into myself, I realized that many human attachments that were still affecting me: one was the fear of hard work and the desire for comfort. I felt that I worked much too hard every day. Second, I thought that if I printed materials for others, I would receive lots of mighty virtue; if someone else did it, it would belong to them. Third, I was very competitive: I wanted to do everything other practitioners did and be the best at everything. I did not want to fall behind in any task. After discovering these attachments, I knew that I was considering things not based on the Fa but rather for myself, following the selfish principles of the old universe. I have now completely abandoned the idea of producing materials. Instead, I'm helping fellow practitioners set up new Fa-study locations to awaken those practitioners who used to attend Fa-study sessions. We want to help them catch up to the Fa-rectification progress so that they will not have regrets at the conclusion of Fa-rectification.
Although establishing Fa-study sites is exhausting work, inside I am very happy to do everything within my power for my fellow practitioners. At the same time, through this process I've gradually lost the attachments to comfort, showing off, and pride, as well as selfish thoughts.
I seldom share my my cultivation experiences, so please compassionately point out anything inappropriate.
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