(Minghui.org) Recently, I frequently experienced a feeling of pressure in my head, and it often lasted for a very long time. I have consequently developed fear in the past several months. I didn't know the cause. I looked within, but didn't find the real attachment, so the fear and the pressure in my head didn't subside.
Once I truly looked within, however, I discovered that the fear was created by lust. Recently, for a period of time, I have been working with a male practitioner on a project. I unknowingly developed a mindset of admiration toward that practitioner's rigorous attitude in doing things. I would often call him to ask him this or that. I even understood some of those issues, but I just wanted to call him to have a discussion. Actually, that was the attachment of sentimentality being magnified. Later I wanted to see him every day. Once I saw him, it would satisfy my desire to see him. Once I recognized that I had such a big human mindset, I promptly started to send forth righteous thoughts to eliminate it. I studied the Fa more and tried to correct myself. Then I really felt a lot lighter.
But, recently I discovered that I had not completely eliminated it, and sometimes I felt as though I was powerless. One evening I shared with an older female practitioner about how male and female practitioners working together can develop sentimentality. How are they to do well in this regard without affecting the project? And how can they upgrade themselves? The practitioner said: “All lives within the Three Realms are immersed in sentimentality. But we cultivators are to reject the arrangements the old forces have imposed on us. Going along with them is too dangerous. A lot of practitioners who have done extremely well at doing the three things have still been persecuted by the evil. The reason behind the persecution is the old forces' arrangements, as well as those practitioners' not having done well in certain respects. As a result, the evil is able to find its way into loopholes. Only by continuously rejecting them and sending forth righteous thoughts to clean them out are we able to completely negate the old forces' arrangements. Behind sentimentality is lust.”
Once I heard that, I was shocked. I remembered that when I had worked with that male practitioner on projects several years ago, I had some incorrect thoughts, and at that time I wasn't clear about the Fa principles. Before long, that male practitioner was abducted and persecuted by the evil. After this male practitioner came back, we had the opportunity to work on projects together again. I discovered that I still had not relinquished the sentimentality toward him. I felt that I only had a little bit of “innocent” affection toward him, not lust. So, I didn't pay attention to cleaning it out. As a result, the lust that was concealed behind the sentimentality was strengthened. It was reflected in liking the kind of loving, harmonious atmosphere that male practitioner brought, liking to rely on him, and liking that feeling of comfort so much that I didn't even want to go out to clarify the truth and save sentient beings anymore. I was afraid of not being safe. I was afraid the evil would persecute me because of my lust.
Because I didn't recognize it in time and didn't completely eliminate it, the old forces once again arranged for me to work together on projects with that male practitioner in a vain attempt to destroy us. The elderly practitioner's words enlightened me. For a long time, I couldn't get through the tests created by my husband. I always complained that my husband never got rid of his lust. I never thought that it had any connection with me. Now I have discovered that the root of the problem is with me. Desire and lust, these two types of matter, have been deeply concealed behind sentimentality. After I realized that, I held my palm upright for a long time and cleaned it all out. Subsequently I felt great. When I called that male practitioner later, the sentimentality in his tone was gone. Our dimensional field became pure and harmonious. The feeling of pressure in my head also disappeared instantly.
I hesitated for a long time before deciding to write this article. I wrote it because I've found that there are a lot of practitioners around me in a similar situation. Some practitioners have yet to recognize the situation. Some are still concealing it, thinking that they have no lust. It's because they are unable to genuinely look within. They have not discovered that there is lust masked behind sentimentality, and that it hasn’t been completely cleaned out. Or, they may have the mindset of saving face, and thus are not willing to face the issue. Consequently, they have yet to walk out of the confusion of sentimentality. Today I wrote this article with the hope that those practitioners who are in the same predicament as I was in previously promptly send forth strong righteous thoughts to clean out and reject the demon of lust's various forms. Do not enlarge your sentimentality, thereby nourishing the demon of lust. The old forces use this disguised form to destroy practitioners.
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Category: Improving Oneself
