(Minghui.org) I'm 23 this year and I followed my mother to begin practicing Dafa in 1998. At that time I was still young and only knew that, following the principles of Falun Dafa, I could not lie, steal or do bad things.
Cultivation Journey of a Young Disciple
When the persecution of Falun Gong began, I was so young that I still did not fully understand how to cultivate. The practitioners from our area went to the Changchun city government offices to appeal. When we got there, I saw many practitioners being beaten by police. Later, we were packed into vehicles and driven to a school. Everybody sat quietly in the courtyard. When I looked up, I noticed the wall was lined with several armed police and they were pointing their guns directly at us. I thought that they would shoot us one by one, but I wasn't afraid.
When we returned home, someone told my mother to sign a statement promising not to practice. The person said that if she refused to sign, it would negatively affect my future. I was beside her and they asked me if I would continue practicing. I said, “I will practice.” Actually, I was not firm but I thought, “Even if I say that I'll continue to practice, you can't do anything to me anyway because I'm still a juvenile!”
In 2001 many local practitioners were arrested. My mother managed to escape but was forced to leave home. She eventually came home. At first, my sister and I stayed at our maternal grandmother's house for two years. While we stayed there I lost my group Fa-study environment, and studied the Fa by myself.
When I began attending junior high school, I secretly studied the Fa under my blanket in the dormitory. Sometimes I read by the light of the moon coming through the window or the light from the hallway that passed through the window above the door into the room. During summer and winter vacations, I studied the Fa at my mother's place.
I often obtained scholarships during junior high school and was even exempted one year of school fees (800 yuan) because of my good grades. My parents divorced when I was young and before my examination, my father stopped giving me money. Without money, I could not take an examination and wouldn't be able to continue my studies. Once, when I went to my mother's house, she gave me a few hundred yuan and I used this money to register for the examination. My results were over the key line. Actually, even if I could enter high school, I didn't have the money to pay for classes. By chance, a high school came to our school that year to recruit students. They said that those students whose results were over the key line could attend their school for free. I decided to enroll there. The school exempted three years of my school and dormitory fees and even gave me 2000 yuan. In this way, I completed my high school education.
When I attended high school, it was much more convenient to go to my mother's place as it was only half an hour away on a bus. Not long after, we bought a computer, printer and CD burner, and were able to produce our own materials.
We made Shen Yun DVDs and my mother distributed them to passersby. One time, as soon as my mother, sister and I took the Shen Yun DVDs out while we were at an intersection, a woman fell from her bicycle. I ran forward to help her and then ran back to give her a Shen Yun DVD. We gave DVDs to everyone we met on the road. The effect was very good. Another time, I found a cell phone. I called the number stored in the phone and contacted the owner's family. I agreed to meet the owner the next day and return the phone to him. Before the meeting, I prepared truth-clarification materials. When I met him, he was very surprised, as he really did not believe that I would return the phone to him.
Gradually Letting Go of Myself while Cooperating with Fellow Practitioners
1. For the sake of Dafa's work, it's nothing to be managed by others
Once five of us drove to distribute truth-clarification materials. Halfway there, we experienced car trouble and a couple of people wanted to go their own way. Unfortunately they began arguing. I remembered that Master taught us to let go of ourselves during conflicts.
Slowly, through interacting with practitioners, I understood that we shouldn't argue with each other. It doesn't matter whether I'm right or in the wrong, I should maintain a peaceful mindset.
Because I'm young, sometimes other practitioners don't listen to me. Initially, I was unhappy but later when I looked inwards, wasn't I seeking fame? Gradually I let go of this attachment.
2. Cultivating myself during the process of teaching technical skills to other practitioners
When I began teaching fellow practitioners technical skills, I did not pay attention to cultivating myself. When I demonstrated the methods my xinxing was not good, and I failed to be considerate of others. Through studying the Fa I enlightened that although I've done many things, I wasn't on the Fa. Thus what I did wasn't sacred; it was the same as an ordinary person doing Dafa work and there was no virtue. Now, I understand that I should conduct myself as a practitioner. I need to patiently explain to the practitioner if she doesn't understand something. This way, there will be no pressure when the practitioner learns and she will be able to learn quickly and happily.
Also, when I encountered bottlenecks during my technical learning, I can always feels Master's help and the problem will be resolved suddenly.
3. Do not be attached to practitioners' attachments and do not give practitioners any pressure
These years, I have been accusing my sister, complaining that she did not come home, etc. This caused her to resent me greatly. One day, she came home. I was in the courtyard and had yet to enter the house when I heard her saying to my mother that she would come back a few days per week. When I heard this, I cried, “I was wrong, I should not treat her like that...”
4. Although I am alone outside, the pace of saving people does not stop
Master said,
“When I teach the Fa infrequently though, what worries me most is not the hardships or ordeals you face, which you know to be plenty hard. They are not the hardest thing; after all, however trying hardship may be, it's over after you get through it, and at that point things are clear to you. Rather, to quietly cultivate in bleak loneliness, unable to see hope, is the hardest of all. Doing any form of cultivation entails undergoing a trial such as this and a path with such features. Only if one can persevere and continually forge ahead does it amount to true diligence. It's easy to talk about, but putting it into action is tremendously difficult. That is why it's said that always cultivating as if you were just starting will surely result in achieving your ultimate rank.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2009 Greater New York International Fa Conference”)
On the “loneliness” that was mentioned in the Fa, there was a time when I really experienced it deeply. I am now in college. Usually, I am less busy as there are not many classes and when there are no classes, I choose to go out and make truth-clarification phone calls to save people. I walk alone for most of the day and mostly I felt loneliness. Once, I walked to Triumph Park and thought of Master. I stood at the riverside and sang “Be Saved” as tears continued to flow.
Sometimes, I would think that it would be great if there is another practitioner who can do the task of saving people with me. However, I am not attached to it now, as everyone's path is different and this is my path. On this path, I will cultivate myself and listen to Master's arrangement.
Believe in Master and the Fa, and Dafa Will Display Miracles
Last year, after we rented a room in an old building, we heard that it would soon be demolished. The building has four doors and one of the doorbells stopped working long ago. Later, the doorbell in our door also stopped working. One night I decided to overcome my attachment of being dependent and the attachment of fear by going out alone to make truth-clarification phone calls or sending truth-clarification messages. I had always gone out with my family and never went out alone, especially at night.
When I came home, I thought, “I have super normal abilities. When I press the doorbell, it will work.” With this thought, I pressed the doorbell and it really worked. Later, another thing happened. There was a disruption in our water supply. Remembering how I made the doorbell work, I thought, “I will open the water-tap and there will definitely be water.” When I went to turn on the water-tap, sure enough, the water flowed.
Once, a two-month old puppy had a chicken bone stuck in its throat and could not spit it out. The puppy seemed to be in great pain and it even spit white foam. I said to the puppy, “Falun Dafa is good, Zhen-Shen-Ren is good”. The puppy raised its head and looked at me. I said it again and it looked at me again. Hence, I said a few more times to it and suddenly, it spit out the bone. At that moment, the situation was really dangerous and the puppy looked like it was dying. It was because I recited Dafa is good to it that saved it's life.
Now during the final stages of Fa-rectification, I will cultivate myself more. I saw the interview with Shen Yun performers on NTDTV and I thought “That's so good.” I felt that they are so pure. I want to cultivate to be like them too. I'm still so far away from that level of cultivation. However, I have confidence and I will keep cultivating. I must become like the name I gave myself, “Snow Plum”, as sacred and clean as the plum flower in the snow.
Above are some of my experiences and understandings. If there is anything inappropriate, kindly point it out.
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