(Minghui.org) I was a futures dealer before I began practicing Falun Gong, and I strove hard for success. In the beginning, I earned some money, but lost it later which was rather painful.
Seeing that I had a problem with greed, I began to search for ways to free my soul and delved into all kinds of spiritual practices. Despite spending a great deal of money, nothing gave me what I was looking for. I then explored Buddhist teachings and meditation, but I could not understand the books, and longed for something that answered my questions clearly and directly.
After learning Falun Gong in March 2011, I began to understand the reasons for loss and gain in one's life. I discovered that true improvement of one's character is infinitely more valuable than any superficial reward.
Finding Falun Gong
My co-worker gave me the book Zhuan Falun. While selecting different parts of the book to read, I was impressed and thought it was teaching people to be good. Then, I was encouraged not to pick and choose certain sections, but to read the book from the beginning to the end. So I began to read it with a calm mind. The section that spoke of the relationship between virtue and karma really appealed to me and I realized that this is what I had been looking for - a high-level teaching that uses everyday language. That is when I started to cultivate.
Doing What Is Required of a Practitioner
Every day I read one chapter in Zhuan Falun and Master’s (Mr. Li Hongzhi, the founder of Falun Gong) new articles. I tried my best not to miss the four times of sending forth righteous thoughts. If I missed it I tried to make up for it at another time.
It took a few months before I did the Falun Gong exercises in the morning. Soon I could sit in the lotus position for one hour. I realized that the pain of crossing both my legs could transform the karma and I would improve myself because of the suffering I endured.
Two months later I established a materials site. My wife, also a relatively new practitioner and our child went to places to hand out the Falun Gong truth clarifying materials and Shen Yun Performing Arts DVDs.
After distributing the materials, we noticed that everyone was reading the materials quite attentively. I overheard two girls talking about it, “I will keep this for the future as a witness for when the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) collapses.”
The year when I began to practice Falun Gong, I went to my hometown for a Chinese New Year celebration. I clarified the truth to my relatives and friends and helped over 20 people quit the CCP and its affiliates.
I made sure that my present and former co-workers, job interviewees and our clients learned what Falun Gong was all about.
Experiencing Tribulations
Due to the old forces' interference, my wife and I were fired from our jobs. During the following three months, I was not able to find another job. Since we couldn't find another job, we became street vendors and sold breakfast food. We took every opportunity to tell people about Falun Gong and used paper money with truth-clarification messages printed on them when giving back change.
We did our business near a busy entrance to the subway with high foot traffic. This allowed to use a lot of this “truth-clarification money.” Occasionally some people tried to report us to the authorities, however, with Master’s protection, we were kept safe.
Being a street vendor allowed me to let go of my attachment to self-interest and helped me to cultivate solidly. My thoughts turned sometimes to my previous profession as a supervisor, a gold analyst and a futures dealer. Being a food vendor allowed me to let go of greed and self-importance.
As soon as I felt uncomfortable, I realized that human notions were attacking me, such as jealousy, saving face and self-interest. Sending forth righteous thoughts helped me let go of these notions.
After selling breakfast, I fixed the computers and offered technical support to fellow practitioners. This way, they could start their own materials site.
I also used my seven e-mail addresses to send people information about the persecution Falun Gong. I send out about 2,000 emails daily and sometimes over 10,000 emails.
Passing the Greed and Self-interest Tribulation
Master said:
“…the development of human society progresses according to the specific law of development. Therefore, what one does in life is not arranged based on one’s abilities. Buddhism believes in the principle of karmic retribution. One’s life is arranged according to one’s karma. No matter how capable you are, if you do not have de, perhaps you will have nothing in this life. You think that another person is good at nothing, but he has a lot of de. He could become a high-ranking official or make a big fortune. An ordinary person cannot see this point and always believes that he should do exactly what he is able to.” (Lecture Seven in Zhuan Falun)
After studying the above passage of the Fa, I could let go of the pain of these losses. I understood that I didn't expend any energy when trading in futures, yet I earned money. I was actually using up my virtue to earn money.
Master mentioned that practitioners should not buy and sell stocks. Therefore I no longer dealt in the futures market. However, in my heart I wanted to use the experience I gained in the market and earn money for producing Falun Gong materials.
Master said:
“The Fa has different requirements for cultivators at different levels. Sacrifice is evidenced by one’s being detached from ordinary human attachments. If a person can indeed calmly abandon everything with his heart being unaffected, he is actually at that level already.” (“Non-Omission” in Essentials For Further Advancement)
I thought that Master did not allow us to buy and sell stocks because it involves human notions. I reasoned, “If we do this with a pure mind and use the earned money to produce Falun Gong materials, how many people could we save? So, I am still doing the most holy thing.”
I put some money into my stock account. After losing a small amount of money on two separate occasions, I began to calm my mind and look within. Maybe my behavior was not in line with Fa? Did I still have some hidden human notions?
Master said, “Yet if a cultivator or an everyday person who cannot even make fundamental sacrifices also discusses this principle, he is actually undermining the Fa by making excuses for the attachments he cannot let go of.” ( “Non-Omission” in Essentials For Further Advancement)
I realized that I still wanted to have a good reputation and it was simply hidden. I was eager to be a famous futures market dealer. My pursuit of having a great reputation was not removed at all. I was still at an ordinary person’s level and my xinxing level was just that high. My hidden real purpose was to use it to practice my skills and help me to become a better dealer. I wanted to use the practice to become famous. It was my selfishness at play.
From then on, I gave up dealing in the futures market. I had rid myself of another major attachment.
“What is owed must be paid back”
As I had lost all of my money in the futures market, I had no money for the Chinese New Year celebration. A friend gave me 2,000 yuan, and I planned to pay him back. He said that I did not have to pay him back.
Mater said: “What is owed must be paid for.” (Lecture Three in Zhuan Falun)
As soon as I earned several thousand yuan with my breakfast business, I paid off the loan.
Passing the Lust Tribulation
When I was an average person, I had a lot of desires, including lust. Therefore, my thought karma was very heavy. I often sent righteous thoughts to remove that dirty thought karma. Whenever the lust desire attacked me, I would immediately recite Master's words: “Desires, lust, and things of these sorts are all human attachments, and all of them should be given up.” (Lecture Six in Zhuan Falun)
Soon my desires, such as lust, were suppressed and gradually the thought karma was significantly reduced.
Looking back at my two and half years on the cultivation path, I could feel Master’s protection and help each and every minute. I deeply appreciate what our merciful and great Master has done for me. As his disciple, I only can keep cultivating diligently and try my best to do the three things well.
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Category: Improving Oneself