(Minghui.org) I have benefited from Falun Dafa both mentally and physically over the past few years. Master has protected me and given me hints as I walked my cultivation path. I would like to share my experience.
1. Getting Rid of My Attachment to My Daughter
Once, the material production center needed extra hands, so my daughter went to help. Right after she left home, I felt uneasy, with all kinds of bad thoughts. I studied the Fa and looked within, and I discovered my attachment to my daughter. I worried about her safety whenever she went out to do Dafa work. I also had the attachment of fear. I kept sending forth righteous rights to get rid of my bad thoughts, but they came back after a while. I kept doing this the whole morning until she came back for lunch.
After lunch, I asked her not to go out in the afternoon. She told me that she needed to go there every day for the next few days since the material center really needed help. I saw her determination and said nothing more, yet my heart was still not calm. I stayed home to send forth righteous thoughts and fought my bad thoughts. I was unable to study the Fa with concentration.
One day she asked me to go with her to help resolve a conflict between two practitioners. On the surface, I was there to help, but I actually wanted to go because I could be with my daughter.
During the whole year that my daughter did this work, I was rarely able to study the Fa with a peaceful mind. I just did it superficially. Then I realized that I should not be like this anymore.
I looked within and knew that I must let go of my attachment. I kept sending forth righteous thoughts and stayed in line with the Fa. I realized that everyone is under Master's protection and everyone has their own cultivation path. I should not interfere with my daughter's Dafa work.
When my daughter went out, I controlled myself so that I would not go with her and would be able to do my own three things well at home. With constant sending forth righteous thoughts and studying the Fa, my righteous thoughts became stronger, my sentiments for my daughter became less, and my heart became more peaceful. I could do the three things solidly.
2. Changing Cultivation Environment at Home
My husband is a male-chauvinist kind of man with a bad temper. I had to take care of all of the housework and the children by myself. I became afraid of him after so many years with him and was also filled with resentment.
I began to practice Dafa in 2002, when the persecution was severe. I was afraid that my husband would oppose it, so I did not tell him but practiced it secretly. Through studying the Fa every day and following the principle of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance, I looked at myself and realized that I should get rid of my resentment toward him.
I also realized that I should validate Dafa and let him know how I have benefited from the practice and the wonderfulness of Dafa. I found an opportunity and told him how my illnesses were gone after I practiced Dafa. My daughter and I tried to clarify the truth to him and wanted him to quit the Chinese Communist Party (CCP).
He believed the CCP propaganda and did not allow me to continue the practice. He asked relatives and friends to talk to me and tried to persuade me to give up the practice.
Seeing my determination, he became angry, struck me in the face and threatened to use a kitchen knife on me. My daughter and I hid in the bedroom and locked the door. He struck the door with his belt, but could not break the glass on the door.
I did not resent him for doing that because I knew that the CCP had deceived him. I pitied him and often found opportunities to tell him more persecution facts. Another time, he whipped me with a broom.
I still sought out chances to talk to him. I also wished that he would meet other practitioners and listen to what they said. One day, he told me that he had a friend who was a practitioner. His friend told him about the effectiveness of Dafa in improving practitioners' health.
My husband changed gradually and no longer came after me. I could study the Fa, exercise and send forth righteous thoughts at home. My daughter and I often reminded him to quit the CCP. We also told him about how high-ranking officials that persecuted Falun Gong got their karmic retribution through the anti-corruption campaign. He listened, but still refused to quit the CCP.
My daughter and I did not give up on him. One day, when he talked to me about being careful when producing Dafa materials, he mentioned that he no longer cared about his CCP membership. I immediately suggested that he quit right then and there. He finally said yes.
All the efforts my daughter and I had made over the past years finally paid off. We must be persistent in clarifying the truth to people no matter what their reaction, since they all came to this world for Dafa.
3. Digging Out Selfishness
When my brother-in-law's family lost their home in a fire, I persuaded my husband to help them rebuild with our money. They were very grateful to me. I told them that I was able to do it because I am a Falun Dafa practitioner and Master teaches us to be compassionate to people. I told them about Dafa, and they all agreed to quit the CCP and their affiliates.
Other relatives from my husband's family saw my changes. Many of them withdrew from the CCP after I clarified the truth to them and some even began to read Zhuan Falun.
My brother-in-law had broken his ribs in a car accident, and they gave him problems for a long time. Then he remembered to recite “Falun Dafa is good” and “Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good” after he quit the CCP. His ribs recovered soon after that. He was very excited and called me to tell me the good news.
I was happy for him, but I felt something behind my happiness, something impure. Through studying the Fa, I realized that, when I clarified the truth to my husband's relatives, my mindset was off. I had the attachment to validating myself and wanted to show them what a good person I was.
This attachment was hidden deeply. I knew that I wanted to save them and what I did was for their own good, but my kindness was not pure. I did it for myself and it was a selfish action, instead of purely helping others.
After digging out the selfishness, my heart was at peace.
4. Saving Sentient Beings
Through Fa study, I realized that Dafa disciples are shouldering the mission of saving sentient beings during this Fa-rectification period. I must do so, as well. I sometimes tell people about Falun Dafa face to face, and sometimes I distribute truth-clarification materials. I can feel that people are waiting for us to save them.
One day, after I purchased some items at a store, I gave the cashier and several others Dafa DVD's. A few meters away, a middle-aged man was sitting in a chair. Our eyes met. At first I did not think of giving him one, but I thought that I should not pick which people to save. I gave him a DVD as well. He was very happy and told me that the DVD was so nicely designed. It seemed that he was indeed waiting for me.
Another day I was riding the bus. At one stop, a cleaning lady got on with a heavy bag. I hoped that she would not sit next to me, but she did. I realized that I should not look down upon her, but instead save her. I chatted with her, starting with the corruption of the government officials. Then I asked her about quitting the CCP. She had heard about it before. I told her more about Falun Dafa and asked her to quit the CCP. She agreed, and another life was saved.
Once some practitioners were unable to take DVDs and left them at my home. I knew that I should give them out. When I distributed them on the street, many people came up to me to ask for them. They were all gone in a short while.
When I went to a gathering with my old co-workers, I brought some DVDs with me because I knew that the gathering was arranged for me. I gave the DVDs to them and they were all happy to take them.
5. Producing Materials
In our area there are several practitioners who distribute materials, but not enough practitioners to produce the materials. I am sometimes short of materials. I decided to make materials myself but had never used a computer. It sounded very difficult.
Master gave me the wisdom. A practitioner taught me the whole process, starting from how to operate a computer. I learned quickly and was able to produce materials shortly thereafter. It truly showed that “Cultivation depends on one’s own efforts, while the transformation of gong is done by one’s master.” (Zhuan Falun)
The process of making the materials was not easy. There were all kinds of problems. Gradually I learned that things would go smoothly if I studied the Fa well and cultivated myself during the process. If I had the pure heart of saving sentient beings, Dafa would give me the power and things could be done smoothly and with good quality.
I found many attachments while making materials—zealotry, anxiety, fear, and more. I was unable to get rid of them completely each time. Through Fa study and sending forth righteous thoughts, I was able to catch them when they appeared and tried to correct myself with the Fa. I felt that my mind was changed, my xinxing was elevated, and I learned how to look within.
I used to concentrate more on Fa study and sending forth righteous thoughts and did not do much with saving people. I did not see much improvement in my cultivation. But through making materials, I felt like I improved a lot.
Toward the end of 2005 when the wave of lawsuits against Jiang Zemin began, many practitioners were harassed. I stopped making materials and had to move the equipment elsewhere. I realized that we should not stop saving people. I moved back the equipment and resumed the work.
Some practitioners questioned me and thought that nobody needed the materials anymore, but I believed Master would send practitioners to take the materials.
It turned out that one of the practitioners who questioned me later came for the materials. It was a very difficult time period since news of the practitioners around me being persecuted or harassed kept coming. My heart became uneasy. Studying Fa and sending forth righteous thoughts helped me to stay righteous and determined.
Epilogue
Master has always been protecting me over the past years, giving me hints and guiding me along the way. I am sincerely grateful for Master's compassionate salvation. Master bears so much for us and we do so little. I will cultivate diligently and be a true practitioner so as to not let Master down.
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