(Minghui.org) I am currently attending Fei Tian College in Middletown, New York. I was excited to attend the first Falun Dafa experience sharing meeting for young practitioners in Washington, DC.
I used to resist writing an experience sharing article. Then, I realized that it was also the attachment of fear: fear of recalling my prior unpleasant experiences and fear of negative comments. After realizing this, I decided to write about my four months of cultivation at Fei Tian College.
Immoral and Depraved Behavior
Both my parents cultivate in Falun Dafa (also called Falun Gong). After the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) initiated the persecution of Falun Gong in 1999, my father was arrested many times. It dramatically changed my life.
During my high school years, I started binge-drinking and even used drugs. Under the impact of emotional turmoil and drugs, I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and had to drop out of school after my freshman year.
I was on the verge of death several times due to a drug overdose. My weight dropped to less than 80 pounds, and I had no appetite. When other people spoke to me, I could only see lips moving without hearing any sound. When I did hear something, even if it was a very simple question, it would take me a long time to decipher it. There were a few times I couldn't even remember who I was when I woke up.
I was like this for over a year, until my father was released from prison. My mother and fellow practitioners helped me. I started to learn to draw and paint and was admitted to a fine art academy. I knew that Master Li (the founder of Falun Dafa) had not given up on me.
But I let Master down. I did intend to turn over a new leaf at the university, but after being admitted, I hung out with my classmates, drank, smoked, and played video games.
Just as I was finishing my freshman year, my parents decided to send me to a school in the United States, worried that I would fall back into my old habits. In fact, I started drinking again. After eleven months I returned to China.
Whether the university was domestic or abroad, it was just another environment that dragged me into overindulgence and deprivation. Of course, the inherent reason for all of this was caused by my poor self-control. The environment of modern society has a huge impact on young people, especially college students.
Master said:
“And so that’s the role they play in this world, trying to steer and destroy humanity with modern thought, with all sorts of tactics that corrupt people, and with a variety of different approaches. Many people have really fallen for it, especially young people. The evil ones have made students, especially college students, their main target of attack.” (“Teaching the Fa in Washington D.C. In 2018” Team Yellow Translation)
Good Cultivation Environment
Dafa was still in my heart, so I went to Washington, DC over a year ago. I was very grateful to fellow practitioners for helping me and taking me to Dafa activities and Fa conferences. They also urged me to join the group Fa study. However, since I had not studied the Fa for a long time, I slacked off in believing in Master and the Fa.
My parents came from China to participate in the Fa conference in Washington, DC, in June 2018. Before their trip, my father hoped that I could study at a school managed by Dafa disciples. He looked into Fei Tian College and enrolled me in the Data Science major,
I realized that this was an exceptional cultivation environment and an opportunity that Master gave me. I decided to study at Fei Tian College and stopped the application process to the graduate program for the School of Art at George Mason University.
This was an opportunity for me to study in a pure and rare cultivation environment as well. It is a piece of pure land. I quit smoking, drinking, and stopped playing video games. I also stopped taking medication.
I benefited most from the daily group Fa-study and group exercises on campus. In the beginning, I was reluctant to participate in the group Fa-study. However, our teacher reminded us via text messages.
I noticed that every student was changing. Several young practitioners, who hardly ever studied the Fa before began to do so and searched inward when encountering problems.
Letting Go of Attachment to Self
In this environment, I learned to look inward, let go of attachments, and unconditionally cooperate with everyone.
I used to emphasize my own ideas when I was designing something, instead of considering the needs of the customer. I would get indignant if my work was questioned and annoyed when criticized.
Through studying Master's lectures, I began to understand how important it was to let go of self. Now I consider what the customer wants. No matter who gives me advice, I accept it.
It became important that I must first be a cultivator, study the Fa, and practice cultivation. I have to let go of self. Otherwise, I would be an everyday person doing Dafa projects.
Although I used to invest a lot of time and energy in my work when I did not study the Fa, the customer was still not satisfied. When I studied the Fa diligently and created something with a true cultivator's mentality, I found that everything worked out well. This is the fundamental purpose of my studying at Fei Tian College: to let go of self and cooperate with others to achieve excellence for Dafa projects to awaken more people.
I thought that it would be difficult for me to study Data Science, as I had not been exposed to it for nearly 10 years. My English was poor, and I had memory loss from taking psychiatric medications. However, when I let go of self and studied the Fa earnestly, I found that the subject was quite simple, and I earned excellent grades by the end of the semester.
Master is encouraging me. Everything has changed since I came to Fei Tian College. I became a true cultivator, I learned to look inward, and I let go of self-interests.
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