(Minghui.org) I am a 16-year-old Dafa disciple. I was born in Perth, Western Australia. Even though we live in Western society, my parents made my sister and me learn and speak Chinese when we were children. They read poems from Hong Yin to us, and we read Zhuan Falun and learned to do the meditation exercise when we were 4 or 5 years old.
I pretty much stopped cultivation when I attended middle school, however. When I was in eighth grade, my grandmother heard that I had stopped cultivating, so she often called me during my school break to remind me to keep following the teachings of Falun Dafa. My mom also bought me Zhuan Falun in English, which helped me get back on the path of cultivation.
I have been a slow learner since I was young. When we attended group Fa study, my dad and my older sister studied with the adults and my mom studied with me. Reading Zhuan Falun before was mainly for teaching me Chinese; I never thought about the meaning of the content. And I felt too lazy to ask my parents about the meaning of a lot of new words. Thus, I didn’t really study the Fa. After reading the book in English, my thinking level dramatically improved. I was reading the book as a whole and not just word by word. Amazingly, after reading the English translation, I could read the book in Chinese so much better and could understand it a lot easier.
During school breaks, I went downtown to tell people about Dafa. At first, my dad took the train with me; but later on he just walked me to the train station, and I went by myself from there. I would spend a whole day at the distribution spot and then go home by myself. I also did this on the weekends. The process of distributing Dafa information was bittersweet: My legs hurt from standing for so long, which upset me. However, every time I told someone the facts about Dafa and gave them an information flyer or booklet, I felt rejuvenated and it kept me going.
In the past, I felt awkward talking about Dafa to people around me. People near us are the ones who have karmic relationships with us, however, and they are waiting for us to tell them the truth. Now I feel I can talk to anyone about Dafa. I find all kinds of opportunities to let them know about the persecution and the benefits of genuine self-cultivation.
I often study the Fa or read articles on Minghui.org when I am at school, which helps increase my righteous thinking and teaches me how to deal with conflicts better. It takes me 15 minutes to get home from school, so I use this time to reflect on how I did at school that day, whether I was following the Fa principles when dealing with problems, and how I could improve myself in the future.
Still, I often experience feelings of jealousy. Master said:
“The issue of jealousy is very serious as it directly involves the matter of whether you can complete cultivation practice. If jealousy is not abolished, everything that you have cultivated will become fragile. ” (Zhuan Falun)
I appreciate Master Li (the founder) giving me so many opportunities to get rid of jealousy, as it can manifest in many ways. It often appears in relationships with my friends. For example, if my friends have closer relationships with other friends, or they get better scores than me, I don't feel happy for them. Sometimes, I’ve felt so jealous that I had no compassion. My heart felt upset and I didn’t know how to get rid of the feelings. I knew I needed to study the Fa more and look within. Jealousy is not my true self, and I needed to reject it firmly. Meanwhile, I always need to get rid of many other attachments as well.
Master said:
“... a practitioner should follow the course of nature. If something is yours, you will not lose it. If something is not yours, you will not have it even if you fight for it.” (Zhuan Falun)
I should not have the thought of protecting my things, because there’s simply no need. If something is truly mine, I won't lose it. If something is not mine, I shouldn’t want it. When I really embody such statements, I feel peaceful, relaxed, and comfortable.
I can feel many mental and emotional changes when I improve in cultivation. I have improved a lot physically as well. I’ve enlightened to a lot of principles, and my wisdom has deepened. I’ve realized that there’s a big gap between ordinary people and practitioners. At school, for example, if a teacher gives me too high of a score by mistake, I let the teacher know. My friends thought I was stupid and asked why I would do such a silly thing. I asked them back: Is telling the truth wrong? Is the answer more important, or the score?
I scored top in math once, but I noticed that the teacher had given me extra points. I told the teacher to adjust my score, which placed me second in the class. Seeing me doing so, the student who initially scored second told the teacher that her score had also been miscalculated, which put me first again. I then told my classmates that one will have good results from doing good deeds.
Conflicts have often come up between my friends and me. Sometimes I felt bullied and sometimes intentionally wronged. There were several occasions when my friends insulted me. I didn’t see myself as a practitioner at such times and lost my temper. I realized these were opportunities Master Li had given me to improve my xinxing. Even when I realized that I still felt upset. Therefore, I sent righteous thoughts to eliminate this kind of thinking.
After making a habit of looking within, I’ve realized a lot of things. First, such issues are tribulations to improve my xinxing and eliminate my karma. Second, I have the attachment of proving myself when I feel wronged. Third, I am a practitioner, and I should not hate others. The person that helped me improve my xinxing was unhappy and suffered. If I blamed her, where would my compassion be?
After realizing where I needed to improve, I’ve treated such situations with compassion much more effectively.
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