(Minghui.org) I am from Heilongjiang Province and started practicing Falun Dafa in 1999. Initially, I could only listen to the audiotapes of Master Li’s (the founder) lectures in Dalian, as I was illiterate.
My celestial eye then opened and I saw colorful Chinese characters. I didn’t realize that Master Li was hinting that I should read instead of just listen. I only enlightened to this after fellow practitioners read to me experience sharing articles from the Minghui website.
Thus, I learned how to read Zhuan Falun. When I came across words that I didn't recognize, I would ask others for help.
Several practitioners later set up a group study at my home to help me improve reading Zhuan Falun. I often lost track of where we were since I couldn’t keep up with the pace of everyone’s reading. Studying the Fa like this didn’t make me realize the importance of the Fa, nor did I take it to heart or improve my xinxing.
Awakening to True Cultivation
One winter, as my husband and I were getting ready to make pork jelly, my husband accidentally spilled food on the floor. I became upset and chastised him. When I was cleaning the floor with a mop, I suddenly slipped and fell. Both my arms, the back of my hands and wrists became swollen.
My husband urged me to go to the hospital, but I told him, “I have Master taking care of me, so I don’t need to go to the hospital. I will be fine.”
Although my hands were swollen, I didn't feel any pain. I was completely healed two months later. I knew that Master had protected me. I came to understand that I had encountered this incident because I didn't take the Fa seriously or maintained my xinxing well.
Practitioners also said that I didn't know how to cultivate. I was confused and flustered as to why they would say that to me since I was doing the three things and had never slacked off in doing the exercises.
Last fall, police broke into my home during group-study and confiscated many truth-clarification materials and Dafa books. Luckily, they didn't take away Master's portraits, and practitioners had managed to escape.
At that time, Master reminded me to study the Fa more by having Chinese characters appear in front of my celestial eye. All these years of cultivating and I still couldn't take the Fa seriously, or calm down while sending forth righteous thoughts and doing the meditation exercise. I also couldn’t find my fundamental attachments. This hindered my improvement in cultivation, thus bringing tribulations to myself and other practitioners.
The incident with the police made me realize the importance of effectively and seriously studying the Fa. After diligently studying the Fa and taking it to heart, I found many hidden attachments to fear, sentimentality, fame, lust, and selfishness.
Letting Go of Attachments
My son was struggling financially, so the idea of wanting to leave a legacy to his family kept popping up in my mind. I now realized that this was due to my strong sentimentality to my children. Each person has their own fate and it was out of my control, so I should let go of the worry for my son.
Sometimes when people asked me how my children were doing, I would go into detail of how many houses and cars they owned, how successful their business was, and so on. This was due to my show-off mentality that I needed to eliminate.
When one of my relatives passed away, I didn’t attend the funeral. I then became worried that they would complain that I was being impolite. After looking within, I realized my worry was due to my attachment to fame.
I have eliminated most of my fear by sending righteous thoughts. I still sometimes get fearful when I see “strange” cars, believing they may be following me.
There are times when I encounter interference during Fa-study. I would fall asleep while reading, causing the book to fall to the floor. When I got muddle-headed, I knelt in front of Master's portrait and the interference would disappear.
When I finally improved, my environment including my family members changed for the better. My husband used to never care about me. Sometimes, he would even beat me or curse at me. He has now changed to a caring, thoughtful person.
I could not have improved without Master's help and protection. I still have many deeply-rooted attachments to eliminate. I will continue to strive forward in cultivation.
http://www.minghui.org/mh/articles/2019/5/6/学法入心-才能提高-385923.html
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Category: Improving Oneself
