(Minghui.org) I am 52 and a Dafa practitioner from a farming village. I used to suffer from many illnesses, such as enteritis, gastritis, pharyngitis, inflammation of the cornea, and so on. The torment from these illnesses caused me to be in a poor mental state. I was depressed and held grudges, which made me have a bad temper. I often became angry for no apparent reason. Although I knew that this was not the way to behave, I could not control myself. Everything did not seem to work out as I had wanted, and I felt lost and bored.
Many questions went through my mind. I wondered why I was living such a hard life, why I was I still alive, where I came from, where I will finally go, and so on. But no one could answer my questions. I often dreamed about not finding my home. It begged the question, “Does it mean my home is not here?”
My mother was often ill and had to take medicine daily. She did not have much education and was mostly illiterate.
Starting to Practice Falun Dafa
My sister-in-law began practicing Falun Dafa at the end of 1998. She gave my mother a copy of Zhuan Falun, the main book of Dafa, and audiotapes of Master’s lectures and exercise instructions. Although mother did not know how to read and could not study Dafa teachings much, she witnessed the extraordinary mental and physical changes in my sister-in-law after she practiced Falun Dafa.
When my mother was on her deathbed, she gave me the precious book, Zhuan Falun, as well as the tapes of Master’s lectures and exercise instructions. She reminded me, “You must learn this Dafa, and you will recover from your illnesses.”
Just over a year after my mother passed away, my brother also died. Their deaths dealt a great blow to me. I felt that life is short. The pain and depression from the loss of my loved ones worsened my health. I had to take medicine daily. Once the symptoms of one illness seemed to be under control, another would act up. The stress from everyday life, my helplessness in life, and the physical and mental pain made me hit rock bottom. However, deep in my heart, I had this thought: “Do not give up. There is still hope.”
After bringing home the Dafa book that mother had given to me, I did not have time to read it due to all sorts of troubling issues. Now I know that this was my karma trying to stop me from practicing Dafa. Finally, remembering my mother’s words on her deathbed, I tried to read Zhuan Falun. To my surprise, I found the answers to my questions after reading through the book just once. This book was the hope that my heart had been longing for.
As I continued to study Dafa, every word was like morning dew that nourished my dried up mental state. I could feel Master’s benevolence and the greatness of Dafa. That was when I started to cultivate.
Benefiting from Dafa
I learned the exercise movements from the book. When I first started to learn the “Holding the wheel in front of the head” movement of the second exercise, I suddenly felt a wind pass from my armpits to my elbows. There seemed to be an energy supporting both of my arms, which felt very comfortable. I also felt that there was something spinning between my palms, and my entire body was enveloped by energy. I later learned that Master was cleansing my body. When I was learning to sit in the lotus position for the fifth exercise, I felt as if I was sitting in space with nothing below me. It was really astonishing and strengthened my determination to cultivate in Dafa.
The more I studied the Fa, the more I witnessed the power of Dafa. When I got into an argument with my wife, her tone was very hostile, and she scolded me with very unpleasant words. I was so angry that I almost passed out. I was just about to give back in kind before I remembered what Master had said: “... did not fight back when hit or talk back when cursed at.” (Fa-Teaching Given At the Conference in Sydney)
I told myself that since I had already started practicing Dafa, I must listen to Master’s teachings and could not vent my demon nature. However, the anger in me kept tugging at my heart. To avoid aggravating the conflict, I hurried out of the house and walked for a while, but I still could not let go of my anger. I lay down for a rest. To overcome my anger, I slapped my face and head hard. Just as I slapped myself, my hand accidentally touched the MP3 player in my pocket. I took out the player and turned it on.
The player started to play a flute piece that was composed by a Dafa practitioner, and at that moment the beautiful music seemed to be able to penetrate the whole of me. I felt as though a stream of water was gushing out of the top of my head, and I immediately felt relaxed. It was a wonderful feeling, and the anger in my heart disappeared.
Clarifying the Truth About Dafa
At home, I try my best to be a good husband and father. In the village, I try my best to be a good citizen and treat others with kindness. I will clarify the truth and persuade the villagers to quit the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) and its youth organizations whenever I have the chance. However, due to my attachments, many tribulations arose due to my lack of righteous thoughts.
On my way to the neighboring village to process chicken feed, the bag that contained corn was worn out by the wheel hub, resulting in a hole. By the time I realized this, corn had been leaking for a few meters. I stopped by a coal shop, borrowed a broom, swept up all the corn, and put them back into the bag. When I returned the broom, I tried to clarify the truth to the shop lady. However, before I could speak more than a few sentences, she said with an unfriendly attitude, “You practice Falun Gong, right? Please get out quickly and do not talk to me about all this.”
I said, “Dafa is being denigrated. What is said on television is not true.” But, all the more she wanted me to leave and made many disrespectful remarks about Dafa. As my righteous thoughts were not strong enough, I did not manage to disintegrate the evil substances that were stopping her from listening. I realized that I needed to study the Fa more to strengthen my righteous thoughts.
A fellow villager came to my house to invite me to attend a speech about taking care of apple trees. I did not want to go because I was worried about not having time for Fa study. However, it came to me that this is an opportunity to clarify the truth to him, so I accepted the invitation. I sent forth righteous thoughts before we talked, and asked Master to strengthen my righteous thoughts so I could eliminate the evil forces and substances that are obstructing him from listening. In the end, apart from the driver, all four people who went in that group quit the CCP.
Overcoming Tribulations
The year before, there was a bountiful harvest of apples on our land. However, when we were selling the apples, not only had the price dropped drastically, the quality that was demanded of the apples became very high. It was a tiring and troublesome affair. This was made worse as my mother-in-law’s apples did not have nice colors. Sometimes, we had to drive to three shops before we could sell just one truckload of apples. It took more than 20 days to sell all the apples.
I worked in the village factory when we were not busy on the farm. However, my parents-in-law told me that they needed me to help sell the apples. I grew unhappy, as they had many children, but only we helped. Actually, at that moment, I was no longer acting like a cultivator.
When I returned home, I felt that I had no strength left. When I woke up the next day, I could not move, which made me very nervous. I thought, “This tribulation is because I’ve deviated from the behavior of a practitioner for the past few days, and all the attachments are bringing me trouble.”
I suddenly understood and send forth righteous thoughts to correct myself: “I do not acknowledge any of the old forces’ arrangements, and my tribulations can only be decided by Master!” As it hurt so much, I could not sit up and send forth righteous thoughts in an upright position. I could not lie down, stand up, or sit properly for the entire day. My wife demanded that I see a doctor, but I refused, so she gave up.
It was important that I maintain the demeanor of a practitioner. I wanted to practice the exercises but couldn’t. I was also covered in sweat. I thought of giving up, but Master’ s lecture came to my mind, “Nothing is truly unbearable or impossible.” (The Ninth Talk, Zhuan Falun) Suddenly, I felt a strong surge of energy enveloping me. So I endured the pain and stood up to do the exercises. Once I started exercising, my waist felt less pain.
When I was going to do the fourth exercise, “Falun Cosmic Orbit,” to move my hands downwards, I could not bend my waist. At that moment, both sides of my waist felt like they were being hit by 2 giant stones. I tried a few times, but it was just too painful to bend. When the music finished, I still did not manage to do the fourth exercise, and I felt dejected.
Just then, Master’s words came to mind, “But you have to endure hardships if you want to raise your level further.” (The Fifth Exercise, The Great Way of Spiritual Perfection)
I decided to finish the fourth exercise no matter what. Giving my all, I restarted the music and slowly bent my waist. At that moment, my mind went blank and I did not think about anything. I bent down, finished the exercise, and it was not as painful.
Master said,
“When disciples have ample righteous thoughtsMaster has the power to turn back the tide”(“The Master-Disciple Bond,” Hong Yin Vol. II)
I understood that no matter what tribulations that we face in our cultivation, as long as we let go of human notions and thoughts, Master will be there to help us, as Master is always by our side!
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