(Minghui.org) I have been cultivating Falun Dafa (Falun Gong) for two-and-a-half years but only at a superficial level. When I was first introduced to the practice, I was deeply moved. Obtaining the Fa triggered my attachment of zealotry and the mentality of showing off. These attachments made me go to extremes in my cultivation.
I behaved strangely and spoke and acted irrationally. Other practitioners thought I was diligent, but in reality, I had already gone to extremes. For example, I used to care a lot about my appearance and had a strong attachment to lust.
My husband, who is not a cultivator, owns his own business and expects me to dress attractively. After taking up cultivation, I found the true meaning of life and was determined to let go of all my greed and desires. I changed completely. It was relatively easy for me to let go of the attachment to wanting to look beautiful but then I became very casual about what I wore, and my husband started to resent the way I looked. I didn’t look inward and started to look for an excuse. I thought, “I am a cultivator and there is no need for me to dress up. I can wear whatever I want and what my husband thinks is not important because he is not a practitioner.”
I spent a lot of time on cultivation things. I stayed up really late and woke up at 3 a.m. every morning to go to the park to do the exercises. I attended group Fa study sessions and did the three things with other practitioners. I wasn’t able to balance my family’s needs with the requirements of cultivation. At home, I cooked simple meals since I thought we should not be attached to food. But that wasn’t being considerate of my husband and that upset him. When I clarified the truth to him, he simply laughed and ridiculed me, which made me think that he was being disrespectful. Looking back, I realize I was not clarifying the truth with rationality and had too many attachments at that time. In the past, I was only tolerant on the surface, not from the bottom of my heart.
After experiencing xinxing tribulations in ordinary society and with other practitioners, I’ve set my mind to truly cultivating myself. I realized I needed to genuinely cultivate, upgrade my xinxing, cultivate my speech, and not slack off in cultivation.
I became very focused when I studied the Fa by not dozing off and clearing out all stray thoughts. While studying the Fa, I felt as if only the Fa and I existed and every single word was reflected in my mind. The more I read, the calmer I became. At times, I would also feel as if there was something rotating in my stomach, making my whole body feel very warm and wonderful. When I increased my mediation from 60 to 150 minutes, I was able to experience my karma being eliminated. Though I felt pain piercing through my body, I did not give up.
During this process, I felt very lucky because my karma was being transformed and it changed my mind and body. I was grateful to Master for compassionately saving me and helping me eliminate karma. I enlightened to the fact that by increasing my mediation time and enduring the pain, I was also cultivating forbearance. When we are cultivating with other practitioners, we need to be tolerant. I was also able to experience the cultivation of mind and body. Now I can meditate without any stray thoughts and also enter into a state of tranquility, feeling wonderful and comfortable like Master mentioned in Zhuan Falun.
By studying the Fa, I understood what Master meant when he said: “We require that in cultivation you conform to the society of ordinary people to the greatest extent possible.” (“Teachings at the Conference in Switzerland”)
Before, I went to extremes, and the attachment of zealotry made me look very different from ordinary people. After genuinely cultivating, I enlightened that I needed to be tidy while studying the Fa, sharing my experiences, and doing the exercises when I am with other practitioners. I needed to spend more time tending to my family and not just focusing on studying the Fa and doing the exercises. What we do in ordinary society is also a way to cultivate our xinxing. I need to remember that I am a cultivator at all times and need to abide by the standards of the Fa. I should put others first and use this opportunity as a chance to improve in cultivation.
I was not always kind to my in-laws. In the past, I was overbearing and opinionated. If my mother-in-law or father-in-law reprimanded me, I would be disrespectful and resent them from the bottom of my heart, causing a big feud. Now, I am able to think of others and have become a better person at home and in ordinary society. Instead of being superficially polite, I have learned to truly care for them. When my mother-in-law fell and hurt her arms, I tended to her every day by helping her shower. In the past, I would often complain if I had to help someone. But after taking up cultivation, not only did I not feel frustrated, it felt very natural to help my mother-in-law. I can offer to help to anyone in need and not foist the responsibility off on anyone else.
At the supermarket, I’m picky about whether the fruit looks good or not because everything is predestined. If I find a couple that are spoiled when I get home, I do not ask for a refund. I abide by the principles of a cultivator and this is also a way to validate the Fa. When people see that Falun Dafa practitioners are good people, they will think Falun Dafa is good. If they have a positive attitude about Dafa, they will be blessed. When I run into a xinxing test in my dreams, I am able to abide by the standards of a cultivator.
By studying the Fa, we can see different manifestations of the Fa at different levels, and use the Fa to guide us in dealing with all kinds of circumstances. If I stumble in cultivation, I will get up and continue to move forward.
By sharing my cultivation experiences at home, improving my xinxing, and validating the Fa, I realized I first had to cultivate myself and do better. By doing so, others will have a good impression of Dafa and be blessed.
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Category: Improving Oneself
