(Minghui.org) When I was a young child, I asked my mother: “If everyone will eventually die one day, then what's the point of living?”
Since it was hard for me to see the importance of being alive, death never seemed that scary to me.
As a Falun Gong practitioner, I recall being tortured on several occasions by the police—almost to the brink of death. However, I was never afraid of dying. I often asked myself, “If I'm not afraid of death, then what attachments do I still harbor?”
One day while walking along the street, a van with several police officers pulled up alongside me. Two officers grabbed me, threw me inside, then placed a black hood over my head.
As the van sped off, one officer screamed, “You have two choices. One: If you tell me what I want to know, we'll spare your life. Two: If you don’t tell me, I’ll kill you and bury you in the ground! No one will ever find you.” I replied, “Then I choose death!”
When we arrived at a remote village, all of the officers began to torture me. I thought, “If they continue on like this, I'd rather die!”
On the surface it looked like I wasn't afraid of death, but in fact, I was afraid of suffering!
When I look back at that event, death didn't seem so scary. Why? Because it provided me with an easy way out—almost like an escape hatch.
On the surface, people thought that I had conquered the fear of death, that I had enlightened to a high level, or that I was genuinely that detached. What they failed to see is my attachment to fear!
However, true enlightenment always involves the elevation of one's character, or in other words, the relinquishing of one's human attachments... including the attachment of fear!
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Category: Improving Oneself
