(Minghui.org) I began Falun Dafa cultivation prior to the persecution in 1999. After I grew up, I got immersed in ordinary human society and behaved like a regular person. Then I was struck by my mother passing away, followed by the CCP virus (coronavirus) spreading throughout the world.
I went to the countryside for over six months, where I had more time to spend with veteran practitioners. It also allowed me to calm my mind to think through the purpose of life, as well as what I should do. I am particularly grateful for Master Li Hongzhi's compassion and practitioners’ help, which brought me back on track.
I live with my in-laws, and I am the only one who practices Falun Dafa. My in-laws grow vegetables. Due to the pandemic, they couldn’t transport their vegetables to other cities, so they had to sell them locally. I often helped them sell their vegetables at the market.
Exposing My Vanity
Initially, my starting point wasn't right. I always thought that I lost face by doing such a menial job. When the sun came out, I was also afraid that my skin would get burned.
I gradually came to realize that I could take this opportunity to use paper currency with truth-clarification messages printed on it, as well as talk to more people in general and help awaken their consciences.
That’s how I began to feel good about helping my in-laws at the market. Then I realized that being afraid of losing face was an attachment to fame. I also saw that my being willing to do it for the opportunity to clarify the truth also came down to selfishness.
I initially felt distressed about making only a little bit of money while working in the wind, rain, or scorching sun. A practitioner shared her thoughts, “Think about what Master said about monks needing to wander around. In addition, how much suffering has Master endured for us?” What she said made me feel regretful. I rectified my mindset and sent forth righteous thoughts to eliminate my attachment to leisure. Regardless of the weather, I wasn’t moved anymore.
Empowered With Master's Grace
I often clarified the truth to people and helped them renounce their memberships in the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) and its affiliated organizations. Some of them were open to the truth and expressed their appreciation. But others looked at me in a strange way. One person said, “You are so young, and you believe this?!” I replied, “I do! Everybody wants to be safe. I want to also wish you safety, out of the goodness of my heart. And I won’t seek a penny from you.” He smiled and said, “Great! I’ll quit the CCP.”
When people used their cell phones to pay me, I gave them a card containing information about breaking through the Internet blockade. I then suggested that they check out uncensored information that way. Most of them accepted it. Even though I didn’t manage to have many people quite the CCP, I remained calm and gradually made breakthroughs in eliminating any interference. Then I came to feel that Master’s encouragement and empowerment grew greater and greater.
When there was an outbreak of the virus in Xinfadi in Beijing, my mother-in-law didn’t want me to go out anymore. I thought this was the time when sentient beings needed to hear the truth to ensure their safety. So I tried to persuade her by saying that I’d be fine wearing a mask. When she persisted, I wasn’t moved, but rather begged for Master’s help to strengthen me. I also sent forth righteous thoughts to eliminate every evil factor that interfered with my saving sentient beings.
The next morning, I missed the alarm, but my mother-in-law woke me up. She called me and asked, “Are you still going out? I prepared some vegetables for you. You're running late.” I truly appreciated Master for helping to change her attitude.
On another occasion, I was handing out brochures on a long-winding street that I was unfamiliar with. After I finished, I happened to get back onto a street I was familiar with. When I turned around, I realized that the area I had just came from was one I thought about covering just a couple days ago. I knew it was Master who helped me, and I was full of gratitude.
Strengthening My Righteous Thoughts
While sending forth righteous thoughts, my thought karma kept popping up. As a result, I kept checking the time. As soon as the time was up, I immediately put down my legs, yet my thoughts were still not clear and clean. I thought I shouldn’t have that thought karma anymore. So I extended the time that I sent forth righteous thoughts.
My resentment and feeling of being wronged kept popping up. I then sent forth righteous thoughts for a little over 40 minutes; yet my thought karma fought so hard that I cried. It was as if a big stone was pressing down inside my stomach, which I could not remove, and it made me suffer.
From deep down, I asked Master to strengthen me. Then I continued sending forth righteous thoughts. A few times the thought karma attempted to lure me into taking down my legs. When it was close to an hour, I almost couldn’t keep it up. I was weeping non-stop, yet I had been strengthening my righteous thoughts.
In the end, a puff of air from my belly came out of my mouth. The big stone which represented my resentment disappeared. With my body feeling very light, my head being very clear and clean, a wonderful feeling came forth. It was just as Master said,
“When it’s difficult to endure, you can endure it. When it’s impossible to do, you can do it.” (Lecture Nine, Zhuan Falun)
It was indeed so!
Taking Ownership for My Attachments
I thought I was being very strict with my son. When he played with other kids who didn’t quite behave themselves, I slacked off on disciplining him. I thought I was just being lazy and irresponsible. But when I shared this with another practitioner, she said to me, “Discipline your own child well. How come you always look at other kids for their misconduct? Are you afraid that they’ll harm your son?”
I suddenly became clear and found the root cause, which came down to my selfishness more than anything else. My child always had a problem of shirking his responsibilities. He turned out to be a mirror for me. I should only look at myself rather than at other people.
My cell phone used to cause a lot of interference for me. Though I clearly knew that I shouldn’t always be on it, there was some kind of force keeping me from being able to completely let it go. As a result, I ended up wasting a lot of time. In order to eliminate this attachment, I strengthened my main consciousness to negate the interference. Meanwhile, on my day-to-day, I tried to leave it somewhere far away. I eventually became used to doing this.
At the beginning, I always wanted to tell those close to me that Falun Dafa is wonderful. However, I was always interfered with by my attachment to fear and a lack of righteous thoughts. Then with more Fa-study, sending forth righteous thoughts, and reading experience-sharing articles more often, I was able to step forward to awaken the consciences of more people. Though my life is still very busy, I always put Fa-study first and look inward whenever possible. My many issues then got resolved. Thank you, Master Li!
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Category: Improving Oneself