(Minghui.org) There was an article circulating online in 2012 about a 92-year-old man who requested his family include six accounts of guilt on his tombstone. His family was hesitant since people usually record their merits and achievements on their tombstones, not wrongdoings.
But the man was insistent. Reflecting on his journey of life, he was always regretting over these sins, leaving his soul tortured. Again and again, he had pleaded to Buddha for forgiveness. Buddha smiled at him, but did not say a word. That is why he decided to record his sins and begged for forgiveness, so that his soul would rest in peace.
This man’s surname is Xu and he was born in 1920. It is unclear whether he is still alive today. He life journey has been a testimony of the brutality of the Chinese Communist Party (CCP). “This is repentance from a 92-year-old citizen. But how many more people need to repent over their sins?” wrote this article.
Below is the testimony of the man.
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First Account: Taking Watches from Dead American Pilots
In March 1942, one aircraft from Flying Tigers (The First American Volunteer Group, AVG) crashed into the woods behind my village. Two pilots parachuted out and landed at the hill of Erlang Mountain.
At that time I was cutting firewood in the area. After rushing there, I saw the parachutes hung on trees and the two pilots lying on the piles of rocks with blood all over. I got close and found both of them had died. I stood there for a while and somehow had the weird thought of checking if they had any valuables. In the end, I took both of their watches.
The next day, township government (Republic of China) sent someone to move the bodies to Chongqing. When people carried them past the village, I stayed in my home and dared not go out looking. I was ashamed of myself: gosh! These Americans came here to help us fight the invading Japanese. We should be very thankful, but I instead took their watches. Was I a human being?
I felt bad since then. In 1948 I could not hold it any more. I borrowed some money as travel expense and went to Chongqing. I then threw both watches into the Jialing River as a way of returning them to the pilots. I then felt a little better.
I am an ordinary person. When the Republic of China government called for people to enlist to fight the Japanese, I joined the army. When the troop arrived in Fuling, however, I fled as a deserter. After the CCP took power in 1949, there were many political campaigns condemning the Kumintang (KMT, ruling party of the Republic of China), I even publicly criticized it for conscription.
I felt so bad, because I have let down my forefathers and ancestors. Millions of fellow Chinese had joined the army and sacrificed for our country. Who still remembers them after the CCP took power in 1949? We have erected merit monuments for them and for the Flying Tigers, because they are true heroes. For me, I only deserve a tombstone of guilt.
Second Account: Killing a Landlord in Land Reform
Representatives from the land reform task force came to my village in 1951 to push forward this campaign and kill landlords. In fact, several landlords in the village were nice and generous, and they got along well with villagers. Although the task force officials held meetings every day, instigating villagers to attack the landlords, there was little progress after two weeks.
Supervisor Hu was impatient. He came to me and another two young men in the village, saying there was a quota from the county that one out of three landlords in our village needed to be killed. Since the class struggle meeting did not go well as he had planned, he hoped we could help call out slogans. This way, at least the meeting would continue.
Somehow I was muddleheaded and agreed. During the meeting that evening, I was the first one to call out, “Down the local tyrants and evil gentry!” “We support land reform!” “Eliminate the landlord class!” Several other young men also joined me.
Seeing the meeting warmed up, Hu loudly reprimanded a landlord named Zhao Renhou and listed his “crimes” of exploiting farmers.
“Don’t you agree Zhao has exploited us?” he raised his voice and asked the crowd.
“Yes, he is!” replied several of us who had the pre-meeting the day before.
“Should we execute him?” he continued.
“Yes!” we answered loudly.
“Now several of you push him out,” he ordered.
We then took Zhao from the meeting out to the yard.
As soon as we got there, Hu asked us to stand by the side. Then there was a gun shot, followed by another one. Zhao collapsed to the ground. All the villagers were shocked. We did not know to “execute” him would mean to kill him. We thought it was driving him out of the meeting place. This way, we lost our conscience and caused Zhao’s death. What an enormous sin!
Third Account: Not Saving a Rightist in Time
Several years later, the Anti-Rightist Campaign started. One intellectual came to the village in 1957 and his last name was also Hu. We heard that his crime was attacking socialism and communism. Hu was thin and weak, as if wind could strike him down. He joined labor work in the people’s commune during the day and kept coughing. At night, he slept at a deserted temple on the edge of the village. The village head treated him badly. We also stayed away from him to avoid trouble.
On the 10th day after Hu came, I went to the pond near the village in the morning to water the land. Suddenly I saw him struggling in the water, and I knew it was a suicide attempt out of despair. I was then debating myself: If I save him, it could bring me trouble; If I do not save him, it is a human life after all. After a while, I jumped in the pond to save him in the end. But it was too late and he had drowned already. Later on, several militiamen came and buried him by covering him with some hay.
In the past few decades, I felt remorse whenever passing there. Although he was hopeless and was killing himself, and saving him might mean more suffering, he was nonetheless a human being.
Four Account: Resorting to Eating the Flesh of a Corpse During the Great Famine
Then there was the notorious Great Leap Forward in 1958. Everyone was bragging, claiming tens of kilos of grains per mu (hundreds of times higher than the actual yield). It was also reported that all barns in the villages were filled to the top.
All these were lies. The harvest was normal, but no one harvested the crops, as all the strong villagers were busy “producing” steel in the backyard furnaces. People’s commune officials led us to fill hay in the barns. We also put some grain on the top for inspection by higher officials.
All these led to the Great Chinese Famine between 1959 and 1961. Lots of people in the villages died, including my parents, wife, and some relatives. My two children and I miraculously survived. When there was no food and in such desperate state, I cooked the flesh of my cousin’s corpse... It’s too gruesome to describe further, but this is an additional sin.
Fifth Account: Disobeying Tradition and Burning Buddha Statues
During the Cultural Revolution, officials forced villagers to pledge loyalty to Mao Zedong, then CCP leader. After removing portraits of forefathers and ancestors, we replaced them with Mao and his right-hand man Lin Biao. Before every meal, we had to pledge our loyalty to Mao, send out best wishes, and sing songs.
During those 10 years of the Cultural Revolution, we did not dare to commemorate our forefathers and ancestors. This was wrong. Furthermore, the militiamen and I had also burned Buddha statues. This is another sin.
Six Account: Grandson Became a Corrupt Officer
My grandson graduated from college in 1990 and had two job options. One option was becoming a high school teacher and another was become secretary for the county officials. I was stubborn, thinking being a teacher had no future. So I insisted my grandson go work for the officials.
Now, my grandson has become a county-level official himself and good at corruption, bribery, gambling, and visiting prostitutes. That is, he became a scourge in the region. It is all my fault!
* * *
In the end, the author of the online article said these wrongdoings were not just this old man’s fault. Instead, it was the tragedy of Chinese people.
Through various political campaigns, the CCP had caused about 80 million deaths, which exceeded the death tolls of the two World Wars. “There are 800 million people in China, how could it be without internal fighting?” Mao once said. He also planned to have political movements like the cultural revolution once every 7 or 8 years.
Three Types of Disgrace
All these were rooted in the CCP, whose core values are class struggle, hatred, brutality and lies.
“Every Chinese person needs reflection like this,” commented a netizen.
“This old man's repentance is a testimony of the Chinese history and all can be attributed to the CCP,” another one wrote.
“No matter voluntarily or passively, we all committed sins,” someone wrote, “As long as the CCP exists, our nation will be in a state of disaster.”
Renowned Chinese scholar Qian Zhongshu said there were types of disgrace in the era of the Cultural Revolution: the humiliation of the victims, the shame of those persecutors, and the blame of those bystanders. If so, aren’t we responsible for the absurdity to some degree?
One woman said her mother was born in 1918, two years older than the 92-year-old man. Her mother always told her not to do bad things, so she and her siblings had always followed their conscience. Nonetheless, one of her classmates attacked her during a political movement so badly that she lost hope. She attempted suicide – fortunately she was saved.
“I could not understand why so many Chinese went insane and blindly listened to Mao’s incitement to do bad deeds?” she wrote. Therefore, when her employer suggested she join the Party in later years, she said no. She explained that being a CCP member was not an honor. To her surprise, people laughed at her because of this.
The classmate who attacked her later found her, but this woman refused to forgive her. “I am a Christian and my mother told me to pardon others,” she wrote, “But I could not understand why she was so bad and I am unable to forgive her.”
Quitting the CCP
On March 3, 2021, a group of 15 renounced membership in the CCP organizations through the website of The Epoch Times. These organizations also include the CCP’s junior associations of the Communist Youth League and the Communist Young Pioneers.
One of these people was Long Yan. Like other Chinese people, Long was told since childhood that the CCP is good and serves the people. “Gradually we found these were all lies,” she wrote. After overcoming the internet blockade and accessing overseas information, she found that history is different from what she was told. “The CCP has hardly done anything other than harming Chinese people,” she continued.
Long said her parents had worked hard, hoping she and others would succeed and become good people. But at school, what she learned was fake history, fake politics, and fake culture. “How can you become a good person given such an education?” she asked.
Fortunately, she has now learned traditional culture, the real story of Falun Gong, and its principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance. It is important to come back to the traditional values, embrace goodness, and reject the CCP, she explained.
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Category: News Commentary
