(Minghui.org) I asked fellow practitioner Bo how to help practitioner Hai, as I saw he had been holding on to an attachment for a long time. Bo suggested that I to talk to Hai directly.

When I first met Hai ten years ago, I had a very natural trust of him since we are a similar age. I therefore told him about my lust problem even though we had just met.

Soon after, we had some conflicts over some things, and what I didn’t expect was that Hai derided and criticized me about the lust problem I had shared with him.

I was so shocked. I have never had such an experience where someone whom I trusted and confided in betrayed my trust and began to make fun of me about the thing in which I shared with him.

At that time, I was too hurt to refute what Hai said. But since then, I have closed my heart to Hai.

Fortunately, I didn’t push away my predestinated relationship with him. Later we still worked together on some projects, and on the surface we are still very close.

In fact, I have never opened my heart to him. I try to protect myself subconsciously, as I don’t know when he would surprise me by saying something bad.

We have gradually only shared on topics that are irrelevant to cultivation, and we try to maintain the harmony. I am determined to change myself.

I garnered my courage to tell Hai about his attachment. Surprisingly, Hai didn’t accept it, and instead criticized me.

I was depressed and thought maybe I was too attached to his attachment, and felt that I should cultivate myself. However, I think we should be responsible for ourselves and fellow practitioners.

I therefore often talk to Hai about topics on cultivating xinxing and looking inward. But he said he didn’t know how to look inward. After a few tries, I gave up.

I once told Hai that I had been a little lazy lately, and he said he agreed that I was lazy. This made me feel uncomfortable, as I felt he was lazier than me.

I realized the seriousness of cultivation. Why didn’t I have the courage to open my heart to examine myself?

I was afraid of providing witness for my fellow practitioner to satirize me, and therefore I closed my heart again. I felt unbalanced as I became the target of being attacked when we shared our experiences.

After I examined myself carefully, I discovered my attachment of avoiding criticism. I moved up one level in cultivation, but I didn’t want to move up more when Hai was trying to help me by bringing out my attachment.

Besides the attachment of avoiding criticism, I also looked down on him, as I felt like he was not qualified to criticize me, as he is lazier than me and doesn’t know how to cultivate xinxing.

I later came to realize that this fellow practitioner is my mirror, and I should look inward at everything.

One time, there were some misunderstandings when I forwarded Hai’s message to another practitioner. The other practitioner was not happy and criticized me.

I was very straightforward when I told Hai about this. I told him that it was the direct manifestation of my xinxing, and it had nothing to do with another fellow practitioner.

I didn’t care if Hai would understand me or not, as he always judged things with human notions. I just talked about my viewpoint based on the Fa, not following his human thoughts.

In the past, I kept silent if I disagreed with his viewpoint, as I thought he didn’t know how to cultivate and look inward. But this time, I didn’t want to continue like this. I just let him know my true thoughts and didn’t care about how he would react. After two experience sharings like this, I found that Hai had changed into a new person.

He knew how to cultivate himself, and understood that what he faced has something to do with his cultivation. Cultivation is wonderful.

When I made up my mind to change myself, my fellow practitioner changed too, even though I thought it was impossible before.

Now Hai and I communicate directly. When we talk frankly, I feel our dimension is getting more and more transparent.

When I open my heart and share with fellow practitioners sincerely, I see that fellow practitioners are improving. Let’s be more diligent in cultivation.

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Category: Improving Oneself