(Minghui.org) One of my tenants terminated his lease on my property in Beijing. He left a huge mess, so I hired a cleaning lady. She told me it was too filthy after working for three hours and refused to continue the work.
I decided to clean and sanitize the property myself. I went there on a weekend and left my child with my husband. I cleaned the house over the course of an entire day.
I’m still a breastfeeding mother. After doing such intensive labor, my right arm and back started to ache. After I took a shower, the pain radiated into my tailbone and spine and my entire body ached. The pain escalated around 10 p.m. and slowly intensified. The fingers on my right hand felt very tense and numb. I had difficulty even moving them a little.
I sat down and thought, “I only abide by Master’s arrangements. If this is what Master arranged for me to eliminate karma, I will endure it. If the old forces are trying to persecute me, I refuse to go along with it.”
As the pain intensified, I started to do the exercises. While moving my right hand, the pain was so bad that I almost couldn’t move it. When I began meditating, the pain was so intense that I trembled with tears. I was unable to continue doing the exercises.
Laying down in bed was also painful. I had to sleep sitting up. My husband was worried, but was supportive of me practicing Falun Dafa. He knew I would not take any medications or go to the hospital. He put a blanket over me and blamed himself for allowing me to do all the cleaning.
I recited “Falun Dafa is good, Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good” several times. Even though my pain was unbearable, I knew that Master was protecting me. I thought, “I will write down my experience to validate Dafa when this is all over.” While constantly reciting the two phrases, I fell asleep.
My Hidden Attachment Is Exposed
When I woke up around 6 a.m. the next morning to breastfeed my child, I realized that my pain was gone! It felt like a dream and everything felt surreal.
I told my husband excitedly, “I am fine now! It's like nothing happened! Thank you Master! This is truly miraculous!” My husband was very happy.
Trying to figure out why this happened, I remembered when I knelt on the floor and cleaned, I complained about my tenant and that cleaning lady. I praised myself for being hardworking and being able to handle filth and dirt. I regarded myself as the “junior monk” who cooked meals and “Let joy be found in hardship” (“Tempering the Will,” Hong Yin)
Even though I had this thought for only a minute, it showed where my xinxing level was. I needed to rectify myself. My husband also told me compassionately, “You are too competitive. I wanted to tell you that you didn’t have to go clean, but you’re too stubborn.”
As cultivators, we should find joy in hardship. However, enduring hardships and suffering is not the goal of cultivation. Instead, it’s the cultivation of one’s heart that matters most.
All I cared about was how I was treated and that others were wrong. This slowly evolved into grudges I held against people and I was not being compassionate. This was far from being compassionate and tolerant like a Falun Dafa practitioner.
It is Dafa’s mighty virtue that my xinxing improves in cultivation. However, my ego got in the way and did not align with Dafa’s principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance. Being boastful, proud, and competitive are all manifestations of demon nature.
While I wrote down this experience, I also enlightened: All the honors and blessings we receive during the Fa-rectification period come from Master and Dafa. As a Dafa disciple, one should not brag or be greedy. This is a very serious matter.
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Category: Improving Oneself
