(Minghui.org) Falun Dafa practitioners who are husband and wife in this life were surely predestined to be so. They can cultivate Dafa and do the three things together. Theoretically, there won’t be much family interference in their spiritual growth.
On the other hand, this doesn’t mean there won’t be conflicts between a married couple, because each person has attachments to remove. Thus, various problems may arise just as they would for an average person. If the couple fails to handle issues in line with the Fa, they may become stuck in a difficult situation. If the stalemate lasts for a long time because they are behaving like ordinary people, then the situation could lead to divorce. I have seen many such examples.
Is it true that family conflicts cannot be resolved while one is cultivating?
Master said,
“As a cultivator, you have to be a good person wherever you are, and you have to be considerate of others—so in the home why can't you be considerate and understanding of your own husband? Aren't we to leave the future mankind with the best things? When both of you are cultivators you should each be considerate of one another, and with that how could you talk about divorce? Marriage should be something unbreakable.” (“Teaching the Fa at the Meeting with Asia-Pacific Students.” Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. VI )
We should also be a good family member and be considerate of others. As husband and wife, we are familiar with each other’s good and bad characteristics, so we should be tolerant and understanding of each other. If we consider the other person’s needs, see and think about problems in line with the Fa principles, won’t our conflicts be easily resolved?
I was attending college when I began to practice Dafa. I wanted to marry a cultivator, and my wish was fulfilled. However, he wasn’t anything like I dreamed he would be. I had trouble with him and we were entangled in conflict for over 12 years. I thought of divorce and it almost came to be.
One day I was thinking, “I have notions, is this cultivation? It is my notions that I can’t let go of. I should act in accordance with Dafa’s requirements.” When my notions changed, I realized that the problems I used to have also changed. Meanwhile, I found out that the opinions I held in the past were ridiculous and stupid, even though I had insisted on them as if they were the truth.
Divorce is a mutated form in today’s society, far from the teachings of higher beings. We need to behave in line with the ways of everyday society as much as possible, but definitely not get divorced. Practitioner couples need to cultivate. In the same way that Master said coordinators are also cultivators, spouses will also have conflicts, and they can’t simply walk away from them.
If one can’t look at problems from the requirements of the Fa, and look within, then one may get caught up in the conflicts and be unable to resolve the problems. It is the same in any environment, not just between husband and wife.
When I came to this realization, I felt sorry for those Dafa adherents who had reached the stage of divorce. They did not cultivate diligently on the path arranged by Master, and wasted a lot of precious time.
I know a couple who has been in conflict for a long time. They talk about divorce whenever they have problems. We ought to cherish the time we have for Dafa cultivation. We can ask Master for help, which is a manifestation of believing in Master and the Fa. If we truly want to change ourselves, Master will definitely help us.
When practitioner couples cultivate well they are also validating the Fa. Falun Dafa can enlighten sentient beings with good thoughts and save them.
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Category: Improving Oneself