(Minghui.org) I would like to share my account of a horrendous ordeal that I experienced in September 2020. I bought a chemical solution to get rid of an odor coming off our sewage pipe. I followed the instructions by pouring the solution into a plastic bottle and adding hot water to it. I screwed the bottle cap on and gave it a gentle shake. The bottle instantly exploded like a bomb!
I learned later that the liquid splattered from the explosion could have corroded even metal. You can only imagine the injuries to my face and eyes. My face was close to the bottle when it exploded.
I felt a stab of pain in my eyes and could not open them. I kept calling out: “Falun Dafa is good! Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good! Master, please help me!” I felt my way to the bathroom to wash out my eyes, but I could not open them due to the severe pain.
When my two-year-old daughter saw me, she squealed in fear. I learned later that my face was an unrecognizable mess. To calm her down, I told her softly: “Don’t be scared, Mama is injured but will get better very soon.”
When I was pregnant with my daughter, we listened to Master’s audio Fa lectures every day, and that continued on even after she was born. Before bedtime, she would either listen to me reciting the Fa or singing some songs Dafa practitioners composed. She is therefore much more advanced cognitively in comparison to children her age.
Although still fearful, she stopped crying and quietly leaned against me, providing me with whatever comfort her little body could offer.
I put her to sleep. She slept for a while but woke suddenly and screamed and howled at the top of her lungs. I have never seen her cry that way and for so long. Seeing my disfigured face must have been such a traumatic experience for her.
I decided it was time to call my husband to come home to look after her. I managed to dial his number by touch only. He asked me whether I needed to go to the hospital. I told him it was not necessary, but I wanted him to come home to look after our little daughter so I could take a rest. Once that was taken care of, I sat down to send forth righteous thoughts and meditate. But soon I gave in to the pain in my eyes, the feelings of nausea and dizziness and leaned back on the sofa so I could continue sending righteous thoughts and reciting the Fa.
More than three hours had passed and my husband was still not home. I rang him again, and having realized the seriousness of the situation, he called a fellow practitioner closest to my house to come over. “You need to go to the hospital straight away,” said the fellow practitioner the moment she saw me. Then it occurred to me that I must have looked awfully frightening for her to say that without any hesitation. She helped me cleaned up a bit and took me to the hospital.
By the time my eyes were examined by an ophthalmologist, they had already been in contact with the powerful chemicals for over four hours. She was shocked by the state of my eyes. “Why did it take you so long to come? If you had come earlier, we might have been able to save your eyes. By now, the corrosion has caused such extensive damage to your eyes that it’s impossible to reverse.” She also asked me, “How did you put up with that excruciating pain for so long?” She was ready to admit me to the hospital, but I calmly refused.
I thought to myself: The outcome of this is in Master’s hands and His only. Master is right here with me. You cannot save my eyes, but Master certainly can. My unusual calmness unnerved the doctor. She raised her voice and said, “Even if you stay here, there’s no guarantee that we can save your eyes.” She assured me the hospital charges would be very reasonable. Again, I calmly refused to stay.
My friend helped me from the doctor’s office to the bench in the corridor. I heard faintly the conversation between the doctor and a nurse. The nurse said, “Doctor, in my over 20 years of nursing, this is the first time I have seen injuries this serious. Her eyes have turned dark grey. Is there any hope?” I did not quite hear the doctor’s reply but her tone was one of pity and resignation indicating the hopelessness of my situation.
I asked myself: How should I treat this sudden disaster? I need my eyes, and I need them in order for me to save people. I must have my sight, and the old forces have no right to take that away from a Dafa disciple.
In the meantime, I also spoke to two other fellow practitioners on the phone and let them know about my immediate situation. With strong righteous thoughts, they both told me not to worry because I would be fine.
My family soon arrived. In front of them, the same doctor fired up: “She is so young and her daughter is still so little. How is she going to cope?” My family immediately filled out the papers to have me admitted. I was thus forced onto a hospital bed.
I thought to myself: I am a practitioner, I have gone through a lot in my cultivation in the last twenty-odd years. How is it that I ended up in a hospital now? What attachments do I have that have made it easy for the old forces to exploit?
I started to look within to unearth my attachments. I had not been very diligent in recent years. I continued to validate the Fa, but I still held onto many human attachments. The most obvious one was resentment towards my husband, which in itself was mired in all sorts of complex human emotions. As cultivators, we are supposed to take lightly any losses and gains in this material world. My husband did not cultivate, but I insisted on making demands on him and treated him as if he was different than other sentient beings. That was a manifestation of my strong selfish desires.
Beings in the new cosmos must always consider others first and will evaluate every situation from the other person’s perspective. Selfishness is a characteristic of the old cosmos, and letting go of self is the only true way to assimilate to Dafa.
I also saw the resentment I harbored in general. The most obvious manifestations of resentment are arrogance, combativeness, jealousy and so on–they all stem from one’s emphasis on self. My resentment had also been shaped under the influence of the evil specter that is the Chinese Communist party (CCP) because its representation in this dimension is none other than hatred and resentment. When I insisted on judging something as being right or wrong using human logic, I was no different from ordinary people. It was a trap I fell into: the feeling of being treated unfairly turned into jealousy and ultimately morphed into resentment.
To be honest, I had been aware of the problems I had in my cultivation, but I did not see them clearly for what they were. Under the old forces’ arrangements and control over me, I failed to distinguish my “true” self from my ordinary self. It was difficult to get rid of my attachments without a clear understanding of the evil elements behind these attachments.
Sometimes I would submit to the evil beings and be led to think in a particular way about someone when I should have reflected on the situation and examined myself instead. Actually, all pains and tribulations in my cultivation were a result of my lack of righteous thoughts and consciousness of my “true” self , as well as my reluctance to let go of human attachments.
After my much needed introspection, I started sending forth righteous thoughts to negate any attacks on me because I only submit to Master’s arrangements for me and do not acknowledge any other arrangements.
Master said,
“This is what I’d think: “You’re cold, and you try to make me cold—are you trying to make me freeze? I’ll be even colder than you, I’ll make you cold.” (Audience laughs. Applause) Or, “You’re trying to make me hot. I’ll turn it around and make you hot—so hot that you can’t stand it.” (Teachings Given on Lantern Festival Day, 2003)
When my eyes really hurt, in my mind I transferred all the pain to the evil beings who had initiated the interference. This way, the pain was reduced to a bearable level. The doctor offered to give me a tetanus injection, but I refused.
In my semi-conscious state, I saw ahead of me a winding path on a steep mountain. The mountain top was not visible and the path appeared extremely narrow. I was the only person on the path climbing up.
A fellow practitioner brought me a small audio player so I could listen to Master’s lectures. Listening to Master’s voice, I fell in and out of sleep because of the pain. Nevertheless, for the whole night, I could feel Falun spinning around my eyes. I felt bad for burdening Master with my trouble yet again.
The next day, the pain in my eyes had reduced by half. The doctor examined my eyes and told the other doctors and nurses that my eyes were recovering and the prospect of saving my eyes was good. I promptly asked to be discharged. The doctor was again alarmed and said, “It does not cost you much to stay here and you did not want an injection anyway. You might risk losing your sight if your eyes get infected. We could monitor them if you stay here.”
My family thought it was better for me to stay for a few more days. I did not think it wise to go against their wish. I was the only patient in the ward, so I settled down to listen to Master’s lectures. Two days later, at my insistence, the doctor agreed to discharge me after I signed a statement to release the hospital from any liability regarding my eyes.
The doctor told me that due to the serious damage to my eyes, even if my eyes were to recover, I would still need to rely on drugs to treat the inevitable dryness and tightness. Also, she said the damage to my left eye was more severe than the right, and it was not possible for it to heal on its own. While she said that, all the time I was negating her words in my mind: “Your words mean nothing to me. I am a Dafa disciple and have Master looking after me. I will definitely be fine.”
She also said my right eye was faring better but the scar did not look good and could become infected. I was told to come back for further treatment. I thought to myself: I am definitely not coming back, and I just have to be careful with myself.
Two months later, my left eye was almost completely recovered, while the swelling in my right eye had only just gone down. The right eye was not recovering as well as the left one after all. What a difference it made to have the correct thought at the time!
After coming home from the hospital, I continued with my work to validate the Fa from home. My face recovered fairly quickly, and I felt none of the dryness and tightness in my eyes as predicted by the doctor.
I am sharing my ordeal to express my gratitude to our merciful Master and to demonstrate how wonderful and extraordinarily amazing Dafa is. Please remember, “Falun Dafa is good!”
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