(Minghui.org) In November 2020, I was summoned to my company's management office. I knew it was because I practiced Falun Dafa.
The day before, management had spoken to my husband and asked him to help persuade me to sign the three statements. The “Zero-out” campaign, a concerted effort to try to make every Dafa practitioner on the government's blacklist renounce their faith, amounts to harassment of Dafa practitioners. Therefore, I tried to maintain an unaffected heart. I decided to go to the office and use this opportunity to clarify the truth to the management.
I firmly told them that I would never write any statements renouncing Falun Dafa. Seeing that my attitude was resolute, they quickly ended the conversation.
In the subsequent months, most of the practitioners in our area were harassed. Some of them behaved with righteous thoughts and refused to cooperate with the authorities ; however, some signed the statement against their conscience, due to the attachment of fear.
Other practitioners were sent to detention centers, while one was forced to quit his job since he would not sign the “three statements.” All of a sudden, the environment became overwhelmingly oppressive.
Remaining Firm in My Convictions
In late May of this year, a manager in my company called and told me I needed to attend a meeting the next day. I thought, since practitioners frequently had a hostile attitude when they were pressured to renounce their faith, I thought I would change my mindset.
I knew I should break through my notions, as those who came to talk to me were also sentient beings, and I should take the opportunity to clarify the truth to them as well.
When I went to the management office the next day, two representatives from the upper authorities were there. They said they wanted to discuss “ideological understandings” with me, but they didn’t mention Falun Dafa.
I said I wouldn’t answer any questions unrelated to Falun Dafa. A manager in my workplace then asked me to talk about my latest understanding of Falun Dafa in light of their encouraging me to accept the new policy.
Over the past few months, everyone in the company was required to study [Chinese Communist] Party history. I asked those two representatives if they knew about Falun Dafa; they all said no.
“Only when you know about Falun Dafa can you express your thoughts on it.” Then I explained how Dafa benefits people’s health and morality, and that Dafa is spreading around the world. I then summarized the evil history of the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) and its persecution against Dafa.
I also enumerated and exposed the lies they were trying to instill in us during the required “study sessions.”
At the end of the over one-hour talk, one of the representatives said, “Well, it looks like we didn’t change your thinking, but you have changed our thinking instead!”
I really appreciate Master Li (Falun Dafa's founder) for giving me this chance to clarify the truth!
Facing Another Round of Harassment
Employees from our local residential office kept harassing my father and husband in the following months. Their purpose was to have them pressure me to sign the “three statements.”
Why wouldn’t the authorities let me go? I looked inward and found those attachments which I had identified a long time ago but didn’t completely get rid of.
Right at that time, my cell phone malfunctioned. I searched for the cause on the Internet, and found it could be related to the inner screen breaking from being dropped.
However, I was very sure I had never dropped the phone. I then changed phones, but when I tried to use the anti-censorship App to visit the Minghui website, the screen immediately went blank.
The following day, I even fell asleep when I did the meditation and sent forth righteous thoughts. This rarely happened, and I realized that I was being interfered with by the old forces.
A few days later, my husband looked very worried after work. He said that the employees at the residential office called him again, and told him my name had been listed for being sent to a brainwashing center.
My supervisor also told him I would be fired if I still refused to sign the “three statements.” My husband was under enormous pressure.
His biggest worry was that once I lost my job, our finances would collapse because he would have no way to pay all our bills by himself. Additionally, he had to support his parents and help our son pay his mortgage.
Actually, my husband had endured a lot of stress during the 20 years of persecution. The authorities had pressured him to write the “guarantee statement” for me many times. He also helped protect my Dafa books and printing supplies whenever the authorities ramped up the persecution.
I felt very guilty because I was not diligent enough; non-practitioners didn’t see enough good aspects of Dafa practitioners, as they had been adversely affected by the CCP's slanderous propaganda.
I thought of more examples: There were over 20 practitioners in my workplace before the persecution began on July 20, 1999, but only three of us insisted on practicing after the persecution began.
One practitioner had been severely interfered with by sickness karma and was unable to take care of himself for years. Another practitioner was repeatedly arrested and jailed.
Many people were commenting that they saw Falun Dafa practitioners being either sick or jailed, so they were resistant to listening to us.
And I thought, if I also lost my job this time, people would have more difficulty in understanding the truth. I realized it was a critical time for me, so I had to calm down, focus on looking inward, find my attachments and let them go.
Then I told my husband, “I will never sign the statements! As you know, I have been cultivating for over 20 years, and my Master eliminated my illnesses and taught me to be a good person. I will never betray Him and Dafa; please understand me. But I will improve myself and pass the test, which will make things easier for you.”
He said he would support me and let me make my own choice. Then I cleared my mind and began to concentrate on finding my attachments and notions:
1. The Attachment of Envy
Although I tried not to get involved in competition for fame and profits at my workplace, I always felt indignant about those colleagues who chased after these things.
2. The Attachment to Comfort
I pursued comfort and quality of life in everyday society, and I feared enduring hardship. I had a strong attachment to material possessions and bought many clothes online.
I also knew this behavior contained the attachment to lust, but I often found excuses for myself, such as, I'm leading a toilsome life, so it is not too much to reward myself with this hobby.
But when I thought of Master’s Fa, I realized it was a big waste of my time and money; it was time for me to let go of this attachment.
Master said:
“Since human beings have qing, being upset is qing, so are happiness, love, hatred, enjoying doing one thing, resenting doing another thing, preferring one person to another, hobbies, and dislikes. Everything belongs to qing, and everyday people just live for it. Then, as a practitioner and one who rises above and beyond the ordinary, one should not use this approach to judge things, and one should break away from them. Therefore, as to the many attachments that come from qing, we should take them lightly and eventually abandon them. Desires, lust, and things of these sorts are all human attachments, and all of them should be given up.” (Lecture Six, Zhuan Falun)
3. The Attachment to Entertainment
I was very attached to literature and films, especially love stories.
My attachment to sentimentality caused big tribulations in my marriage, which almost broke up at one point. Although I managed to take things much more lightly, I was still tempted by many trends in everyday society.
I still liked watching films and TV series whenever I had time. I researched all the directors and actors whom I liked and even wanted to set up a Weibo account to post comments.
I initially let go of doing this since I knew this is not something a practitioner should do; but that attachment recurred after some time. When I looked inward and found those old attachments, I scared myself.
I felt so guilty and ashamed. But when I thought of the Fa, I was determined to be diligent and move forward confidently.
Master said:
“I have said that if you fall, pick yourself up and keep going forward—Master won’t abandon you, and you mustn’t lose confidence. There are still opportunities, and I’ll save you no matter what. Now do you still lack confidence?” (“Teachings Given on Lantern Festival Day, 2003”)
Master hadn’t abandoned such a disappointing student like me, but instead, he repeatedly gave me hints and encouraged me. He helps me move forward all the time. So how could I still be not diligent?
When I was determined to let go of all those attachments, I felt much stronger. I knew I must take the initiative and negate all the old forces’ arrangements, and disintegrate the so-called “Zero-out” campaign!
Thank you, Master!
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Category: Improving Oneself
