(Minghui.org) I grew up in a family of Falun Dafa practitioners. Dafa gave me good health as well as wisdom. I was a top student throughout elementary, middle, and most of high school.
When I was little, I was not attached to grades or class rank. However, in middle school, I was moved by praise from teachers and competition among students. I gradually paid more and more attention to class rank. My desire for fame grew, and soon the old forces took advantage of my loopholes.
I was a top student for years. However, after entering my senior year of high school, my grades began fluctuating. The sudden fluctuations and declines were simply unacceptable to me. I looked for external reasons, and found there were none. Only then did I realize that there was something wrong with my xinxing. I always took my good grades for granted. Although I understood they were given by Dafa, in this toxic society where everyone pursues fame and fortune, I began paying attention to my reputation. I was pleased with little achievements. I thought I had talent and should strive to pursue material things achieve some goals. It wasn’t until I received this hard blow that I realized my desire for fame had become quite strong.
After sharing with my mother, who’s also a practitioner, I was determined to eliminate this attachment to fame. I sent righteous thoughts and repeatedly recited:
“... Not seeking a namelife is carefree and contentNot set on profitone is known as humane and righteous ...”(“An Upright Person,” Hong Yin)
After some time, I became less concerned about fame. I was not disturbed when my classmates talked about their scores, and my heart was not moved when I saw the exam results. Yet my grades did not improve. It seemed that I could never reach the high level I once had. Whenever I thought about the good grades I previously achieved and how my teachers praised me, I felt an indescribable bitterness in my heart. I thought I eliminated most of my attachment to reputation, but every time I thought of the past, I was upset. I realized I was not in a good cultivation state, and I hadn’t found the source of the problem.
I kept looking inward. More scenarios around grades emerged⸺I was upset that my grades were not as good as before; I was distressed that the college entrance examination goals were difficult to achieve; I was jealous when my desk mate’s grades were higher than mine; I worried that teachers were dissatisfied with me, and so on. I saw my attachments to reputation, showing off, a competitive mentality, and jealousy. I was sad and felt ashamed. After cultivating for so long, I still had so many human attachments, and they were so strong.
My mother reminded me, so I continued looking inward. I found these attachments were connected to each other, and they all pointed to the same source: Selfishness. Why was I so obsessed with grades? Why did I worry about my grades falling? I was sincerely happy for my friend who got a better grade than I. So, why was I so jealous of my desk mate when he surpassed me? It was selfishness, well-disguised ego—decayed matter from the old universe! It was not really me! I said to Master: It was my hidden selfishness that allowed the old forces to take advantage of my loopholes. I will never acknowledge the old forces’ interference. I will only follow Master’s arrangement! I asked Master to help me abandon the false self and return to my true self.
When I took the next few exams, there were a lot of bizarre and low-level mistakes in all my test papers. After the graded exam papers were returned, I couldn’t believe that they were written by me. What was even more unbelievable was that there were many mistakes in the exam grading, which lowered my total grade by dozens of points.
I was completely aware that the false self I dug out didn’t want to be eliminated or disintegrated, so it attacked me viciously, preventing me from improving and validating Dafa.
My mother and I decided to send forth righteous thoughts to eliminate all the evil that conspired to interfere with my validating Dafa. I shall negate the old forces’ persecution, let go off my human attachments, and believe in Master and Dafa!
In the following exam, the errors were greatly reduced and there was no grading errors on my test paper. In the next exam, my score was the second best in the class. My classmates were surprised. That night the head teacher called my father to congratulate us. This all happened very quickly. I found I cared very little about the scores, instead my heart was filled with gratitude.
Master said,
“In teaching the Fa, I have talked about the principle whereby a school student who does his schoolwork well will naturally be admitted to college, whereas a school student who is attached to being admitted to college but who doesn’t do his schoolwork well won’t be admitted. It isn’t wrong for a cultivator to wish to reach Consummation, but your mind should be on the Fa. While continually cultivating you will unwittingly meet the standard for Consummation.” (“Eliminate Your Last Attachment(s),” The Essentials of Diligent Progress II)
It’s every student’s duty to study well. Being a good student is naturally a manifestation of validating Dafa, but the prerequisite is that one must give up all human attachments and follow Master’s arrangement. When a Dafa disciple’s heart is in the right place, Master gives the best!
Just before the college entrance exams, my grades quickly improved and stabilized. During the exams, I was calm and performed well. I was admitted to a key university. My family witnessed the power of Dafa, and the beauty of Dafa was displayed to the people around us.
Thank you, Master!
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