(Minghui.org) I woke up around 2 a.m., but went back to sleep again as it was still too early to do the exercises. I then had a bad dream. I was in a place full of excrement, and my body was covered with feces and urine. It’s so filthy.
After I woke up, I felt dirty and uncomfortable. I realized that my dimensional field was not clean. But why? I thought I was more diligent now than in the past.
I was very touched recently after listening to Minghui Radio’s special articles “Getting Rid of the Party Culture” and “Eliminating Sickness Karma.” I examined myself and realized that there was a gap between myself and other practitioners. I exhibited a lot of bad behavior given the indoctrination by the Chinese Communist Party (CCP). This realization also inspired me to cultivate diligently. I was stunned by fellow practitioners’ rock-solid faith in Master and Dafa during the tribulation of sickness karma. I also learned from fellow practitioners how to look inward and believe in Master and the Fa. I can now recite the Fa much faster than in the past.
Then where is my problem? I looked inward, but couldn’t find it. Instead, my focus was resolving the crisis caused by my human attachments.
My daughter lives in another city and has two sons, a 10-year-old and three-year-old. I had taken care of the younger grandson two years ago and then my daughter’s mother-in-law took over. In the middle of August, my daughter asked me to take care of her sons at the beginning of September as her mother-in-law needed to go home at the end of August. I was very happy hearing this.
However, by the beginning of September, my daughter told me that her husband would come to pick me up during the holiday around October 1, that is, one month later. Yesterday, I asked her about the situation during our phone conversation. She said they were able to handle the children by themselves for the time being. I felt kind of disappointed.
My daughter needs someone to take care of her sons, so why do they keep pushing back the time for me to go there?
I had taken care of the younger grandson since he was little, and favored him more in my heart. My older grandson complained about this many times. After I returned home, I missed my little grandson so much and often made video calls with him. Therefore, I had been looking forward to seeing him since my daughter told me she needed me to look after the grandchildren. I had prepared various foods and other things to take with me. As the time had been pushed back again and again, I couldn’t stop thinking about this, even while studying the Fa and doing exercises.
Why am I so eager to go to my daughter’s home? One reason is to see my little grandson as I miss him so much. Another reason is trying to escape harassment from the local community. Before the Chinese Communist Party’s 20th National Congress, the local community called my husband several times to inform him that Political and Legal Affairs Committee personnel wanted to see me. Every time, my husband told them I was visiting my daughter in another city. I had been sending righteous thoughts to deny all of the old forces arrangements. I only walk the path Master arranged for me. No one has the right to test me. My cultivation has nothing to do with the old forces, and they are not allowed to use people to commit crimes against Dafa.
It seemed that I had strong righteous thoughts, but deep in my heart, I wished to go to my daughter’s home as soon as possible so the authorities couldn’t find me. This was the true reason that I was eager to go to my daughter’s home – to escape the authorities.
My dream last night literally woke me up. I should get rid of the sentiment for my daughter and my grandsons. The principles at high levels are reversed. Any sentiment and material interests that I am attached to in the human world are actually very filthy things in other dimensions. Master enlightened me through a dream that being attached to the human world is like being attached to filth in a cesspit. These attachments will make cultivators forget their vows and miss the opportunity to save sentient beings, and be destroyed.
Looking inward deeply, I am worried about being persecuted again and afraid of trouble as I don’t want to deal with them. However, our responsibility as Dafa practitioners is to assist Master in Fa-rectification and save sentient beings. The trouble of being contacted by personnel in the Political and Legal Affairs Committee is actually caused by our attachments. If they indeed came, I should clarify the truth to them as it’s not always easy to find them.
I am no longer attached to the time to go to my daughter’s home. Everything should be centered around saving people, rather than around ordinary people.
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Category: Improving Oneself
