(Minghui.org) I always considered myself to be optimistic and positive, without holding any negative thoughts, but over the past few days, my husband has repeatedly pointed out that I “always see the negative side of things first.” I believe Master was using my husband to point out my problem, that negative thoughts had become a part of my life, and I did not even notice it.
These negative thoughts manifested around very small things. For example, my husband and I were in the living room one weekend. I looked out the window where the morning sun was shining on the trees in the backyard. I blurted out, “These branches are getting bushy and need to be trimmed, or they’ll take up too much space.” My husband said, “Why do you always see the bad things first?”
I argued, “It’s not a ‘bad thing’. I’m just stating a fact.” He ignored me and continued his reading.
One day last week, I planted melon and tomato seedlings in the vegetable garden. On Monday morning, as my husband was weeding the garden, I walked over to check the seedlings. Seeing that he had protected one seedling with a funnel-type plastic cover, the following words slipped out of my mouth, “Ugh, even this one was eaten by bugs.”
I didn’t expect him to respond with, “Why do you always point out the bad things first?” He explained, “Your first reaction is to see the negative, instead of thinking that your husband did the right thing by protecting the seedlings.” This felt like a knock on my head.
I replied, “Hmm, you’re right, I didn’t even acknowledge that. I should correct it.” It’s true that the first thing I saw was the green protective cover, but the words that reflected in my mind were that the leaves had been eaten by bugs.
My husband continued, “The outcome already exists, so what is the point of you talking about it? It remains to be seen how you go about solving the problem. See, you planted the seedling, but you didn’t even bother to care for them.”
I wanted to rebut him by saying, “I’m the one who worked so hard to plant all the seedlings, and you’re blaming me?” But I held my tongue. I realized he was right, and it was partially my fault.
I took a moment to reflect on myself afterward and realized that I had unintentionally allowed my negative thoughts take over. I always picked on my husband, “You bought so many things and put them everywhere, leaving us less and less living space.” Although I was tolerant on the surface, I was complaining in my heart.
I realized that I behaved the same way in my job and on Dafa projects. Whenever I encountered a problem or difficulty, the first thing that came to mind was the negative outcome, and the thought of “what’s going to happen to me?” To put it bluntly, it is selfish to be concerned with one’s own gain and loss, without measuring it with the Fa, being tolerant of others, and considering things from the perspective of others as to why things were not done well.
Professional development training in western society emphasizes how personal communication is handled. When faced with an upset customer or difficult questions, one needs to defuse it from different positive angles and let the other party feel one’s positive attitude and enthusiasm, regardless, from beginning to end, which is key to a successful negotiation, sale, or trade.
These two small incidents helped me realize that as a Dafa practitioner who is tasked with assisting Master in the Fa-rectification, I should always have a positive mentality and attitude, and keep removing the negative thoughts that I have grown accustomed to.
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Category: Improving Oneself
